OMG! I am a new lpn graduate.I got hired last week for the midnight shift (I preferred afternoons but no opening yet for that shift).I just had my first 3 days of orientation and it was so hard.FYI, in our unit,we only have 1 nurse for the midnight shift and 57 patients(the manager already asked me if I'm ok being on my own with 50+ patients). I just had my first 2 days of my 1 month of orientation and I feel very overwhelmed with everything.
My first 2 days I had to learn skills.it was ok until I got to learning to do the paperwork.I got confused with learning how to do nursing audits,med reconciliation,charting doctor's orders.None of my nurse orientors had enough time to teach me those with 50+ patients.
Worse of all,on my 3rd day,I had 1 seasoned nurse train me.She already knew I just graduated but still she just told me since I already got my license,I can pass meds on my own,made me do the narcotic count even if I NEVER knew how to count the narcotics and do the treatments.No wonder there's the saying nurses eat their young.She did not even tell me where the meds are in the med cart,so I had to try to manually find those meds.She just threw me cluluess on the floor.As a result,I was left still passing meds when my shift ended at 7:30.I apologized to the oncoming day nurse that it took me time because it's only my 3rd day being a nurse and my nurse orientor threw me on the floor without teaching me how to do anything.Then the oncoming nurse even had the nerve to say I better hurry up next time, knowing I'm a new graduate.
I feel so stupid and incompetent and very slow.But what can I do? It was my first time passing meds on my own.Then my orientor later said she threw me to the wolves in purpose so I will know how hard it is on my unit and she even said "I hope you won't leave this job". IS that even legal to make a new graduate nurse orientee pass meds on her own and even count narcs without knowing how to do them?? I thought orientation was supposed to be a time to learn and not to be thrown on the floor until I get done with orientation.It was only my 3rd day.Its either this nurse is too lazy to teach me or she wants to put my hard-earned license at risk.I shouldnt be thrown on the floor to pass meds on my own until I'm done with orientation right?
I dont wanna lose my job because it really pays me good.I spent 8 years of my life trying to get this license.But OMG! How can they expect a new graduate be on her own with 57 patients.I dont feel it is safe.What if I have questions or if I have an emergency and I dont have any other nurse to help me? I prefer the afternoon shift coz at least they have 2 nurses.So I can ask another nurse if I dont know how to do something.But there's no opening.I wanna report this to my manager so bad,how I really feel unsafe if I'm left on my own and that my nurse orientors aren't teaching me properly,but I dont wanna be unemployed again.Should I insist on just going to the afternoon shift and if the manager still says there's no opening,just find another job?But at this economy,it is very hard to find another job.I wish all seasoned nurses could just remember and never forget that they were once new graduates too who didnt know much so they know how scared and intimated we,new nurse graduates, feel.I'm very confused now.Should I keep this job risking my license?Do you think my manager might fire me if I really tell her how I feel about my orientation?or should I leave this job if there's no open afternoon shift?Any advice from all nurses I would really appreciate.Thanks