NCLEX psychosis

Students NCLEX

Published

I took the NCLEX this week and it was the worst experience of my life. I studied like crazy and was a nervous wreck the entire time but kept rationalizing in my head how logically I should pass.... I graduated from a school with one of the highest pass rates in Vegas, took the review which has a 98% pass rate, studied the entire Kaplan book and even studied parts of Mosby's, Saunders and Llippincott. I was about as calm as a psycho woman could be when I arrived at the testing center. The first question came up and I wanted to leave, tell them I'd like to forfeit my money and reschedule because I didn't have any idea what the first question was even asking. Obviously, I couldn't though so after reading and analyzing the question I chose what I felt might be the answer and clicked "next". The next question was the same way, I didn't feel like I knew what precisely they were asking in order to answer the question, again chose the best answer as I interpreted the question and clicked "next". It seemed like it went like that throughout the entire exam. I was nearing the 2 hour mark when I would be offered my first break without penalty of my 6 hour time limit. I wasn't paying attention to which question I was on and when I clicked "next" with the same amount of uncertainty I'd had with every question up to that point the screen went blank. I thought #&%$, just my luck.... a computer malfunction. Nope, it said I was done and to continue answering the survey questions before leaving the testing room. Leaving Pearson everyone was very nice, encouraging.... giving me a little pamphlet telling me what to expect now, when I could get my results, when I could retest, etc as they told me good bye and sent me on my way. I was still in shock that it was over and I find my way to my car, start it up, pull out of the parking structure and then it hit me..... I just failed the NCLEX. I was a wreck, called my momon the way home to tell her I failed and then I had to get off the phone because I needed to focus on not becoming hysterical so I could get home without an accident. Once home I let myself fall apart, hysterically crying, getting physically ill, laying on the couch the rest of the afternoon and then eating a small bite before going to bed. I had to wait 48 hours to get the "quick results" that would confirm my failing. The next day I stayed in my pajamas and in my room most of the day. Luckily the next day I was taking an IV class, which I went to thinking, what is the point of this because I know I failed. At lunch I checked and it said my test results were ready, my stomach sank, because I knew I'd have to face the FACT that I failed when I got home and paid my $7.95 for the results. I drove home becoming more depressed than I can remember being in a long time. I hit a few red lights which made the agony even worse. When I got home I changed into my pajamas to make it easier to lock myself in my room and let myself mourn my failure. I got my computer, put it on the table and logged on to get my results. The first time I entered my credit card information I forgot to put the expiration date so when I clicked "next" (what is it with the "next" everywhere with these people) I got an error message. For the love of God, can they at least make this part easy? I put it in again and it said I'd confirm my order on the next page so I sat there as I clicked "next".... confirmed my order by clicking the final "next" and ran away before the result could come up. I yelled for my mom to come read it but luck would have it she was busy upstairs and didn't hear me. I couldn't wait and didn't have the energy to yell or go upstairs to get her so I sat down with my eyes closed at the computer and then took a deep breath and looked. I read each line my name, the date of the test, the name of the test I took and finally the result.... pass.

After reading that I was crying, screaming and running around the house ........ I'm still in shock, but I passed! When it's your time to take the NCLEX, remember my experience and know your reactions are "normal" for someone who has worked their a$$ of for so long to be put through one last ultimate "final exam" in order to reach their goal.

gmtkings

17 Posts

reading your post gave me chills! i swear, i felt your anxiety hehe. thank goodness it was all for nothing, cuz you passed! congratulations!!!!

Silverdragon102, BSN

1 Article; 39,477 Posts

Specializes in Medical and general practice now LTC.

Congratulations and yes very normal to come out of the test center and feel as if you failed

jerzie0820

88 Posts

i love it when everyone shares their nclex experience in detailed. mind if i just ask, which materials you used? if you've done kaplan, what were your scores? on my opinion, you already did a very good job in the beginning. i have no clue what made you anxious about the exam.. hehe

congratulations!

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