Why "failed" is the wrong word.

  1. For those of you who didn't pass:

    I want to encourage you to stop using the word "failed". Failure is reserved for those who are never courageous enough to try. That is what failure is. The inability to put yourself out there, to stick a toe in icy water or to walk a path you have never ventured down before. Everytime you take out your books to study...you have tried. By trying, you will never be a failure. When you don't pass, you have an opportunity to review your mistakes, try something new and start over again. When you fail, you throw yourself down a rabbit hole and convince yourself that you can never do something you set out to do.

    None of you have "failed" this exam. Not one of you. You simply didn't pass. One question can send the teeter totter in one direction or the other. Whether you missed passing by one or one hundred and one, you haven't failed. The people who fail are those who never venture forward. The ones who fail are the people who stay in one spot for the rest of their lives because they are too afraid to reach out to unfamiliar territory.

    Not passing and failing are not the same thing.

    If you didn't pass the NCLEX, life is not over. There are hundreds of thousands more days in your future to change your strategy, to learn, to grow and to, most importantly, try again.

    There are some horrible nurses out there who just happen to be great test takers. You've seen them. You've run across them in hospitals and doctors offices. You have even wondered "how can this person be a NURSE?" Simple. They passed an exam. Nothing more. You all know being a nurse is so much more than being able to pass a test. It is a test everyday you put on your uniform. It is managing to keep a smile on your face even in the most painful and unfortunate times. It is knowing when someone needs their hand held or someone to talk to.

    Passing a test does not give you that instinct. Many of you who haven't passed your exam fit the bill for nursing. You are kind, considerate, thoughtful of others. You are smart, capable and competent.

    You just don't take tests well. That's all. Nothing more.

    Not passing a test doesn't mean you shouldn't be a nurse. You SHOULD! It doesn't mean that your dreams are over. They AREN'T. It certainly doesn't mean you should give up.

    You shouldn't.

    Find new strategies, learn new ways of thinking, consult people who are already in your field, go back to your nursing instructors for help. Do whatever it takes. This is your dream. This is your goal. This is your life and what you are meant to do. The fact that you feel so passionately about not passing only shows how much it means to you. Dust yourself off and try again. It's only an exam. You are bigger than it. You are stronger than it.

    Anyone who has ever sat for the NCLEX can by no means ever be considered a failure. No one. It is one of the biggest challenges you will ever face. Rise to it. Stand in front of it and stare it down. Then, attack it.

    Most importantly, never give up. Giving up your dream is what makes you a failure.

    Around here, there are no failures. Only future nurses who didn't pass yet.

    Please remember that.

  2. Visit Cherybaby profile page

    About Cherybaby

    Joined: Aug '02; Posts: 634; Likes: 979
    Specialty: 10 year(s) of experience in Derm/Wound Care/OP Surgery/LTC


  3. by   Leilah75_RN
    amen to that.!!!:bowingpur

    thanks again cher :flowersfo for lifting our spirits up. yes! we didnt fail, we are future nurses waiting to pass nclex.:caduceus: :caduceus: :snow:
  4. by   trekjudy
    Cher your too awesome.....I hope someone makes this a sticky note.....
  5. by   Cherybaby
    I hope so too. There are too many people walking around here or reading the boards all discouraged and hurt. I can't bear that...because everyone deserves to have their dream come true. I hate the word "Fail" with all my heart. We are all just nurses who have yet to pass...that's all.

    I hope everyone reads this, those who have taken the boards and are waiting, those who have not taken them yet...and those who have taken them and did not pass this time around.

    They need to know how valuable they are...

  6. by   S.N. Visit
    I agree, this should be a "sticky ".......Those are beautiful words of encouragement and wisdom!
  7. by   rissa47
    wow cher that was soo nice....i highly recommned this to each and everyone it is so darn uplifting...and i must admit i was i an awe...it gives me more courage to get through and everything you said was right!! i am soo down right now thinking that i was not able to make it and i am beggining to lose my self-esteem but because of your inspiring words i was able to reflect and realize that...it's okay to stumble and don't be discouraged but instead to fight more for your dreams and believe in yourself....thanks cher!!! what you have said is so inspiring!!! keep it up!!
  8. by   fire storm
    Thank much, since of late this is the word that is in path. I really feel encourage to keep on trying
  9. by   renri4
    yeah,your'e right!!! try and try until we succeed... never give up! because this is the only way to reach our goal... :roll thank you... :angel2: your'e like an angel,touches people for sharing you inspiring words...:spin:
  10. by   muffie
    smart lady

    great words of wisdom

    you'll make many feel better
  11. by   ex-smokerwhoserved
    Wow! I am new here and I have been worried about learning how to become just a CNA. Your post brought tears to my eyes. Very encouraging and well put. Bravo.
  12. by   jayann
    hi cher,

    congrats to you!
    thanks for your inspiring words. i've recently didnt make it with my NCLEX (Jan 7) but somehow it didnt make me depress.it is sad but maybe it's not yet the right time.. it's just an exam and it's not a measurement of my capabilities being a good nurse. right now i am picking up the pieces, in fact i have just sent my re-application to CA BON, and that's a good way to start...and after a week i'll start to pick up my books again, double my effort. it's very hard to work and study at the same time and i am not in my own country..

    thank you for such a nice words..it's inspiring..this is just a temporary setback and hopefully i am going to bounce back..nothing will hinder me to achieve my "calling" being a nurse...
  13. by   Cherybaby
    Jayann - I am glad to hear it. don't let anything deter you or stop you from what you want the most in life. We only go around once. We have to make the best of the time we are given on this earth. That means, no giving up or giving in on your dreams. Focus on your weaknesses in nursing and double up on the studying of those subjects. Do thousands of questions. The NCLEX is not so much a right or wrong as it is what is the best thing to do in a given situation. Think critically. What would YOU want done first, if you were the patient in the question? Whatever you do, don't let your nerves get the best of you. Pretend you are in your own home, just practicing.

    You can do this. I know you can!
  14. by   kemerick
    That put the icing on the cake!!! I have read many inspirational stories, but I think what you wrote really touched me! I have not passed the test so many times (5) and it does make me "feel" like nursing isn't for me, but the thing is I "know" nursing is for me. I know that's what I'm here to do and I will continue to try as many times as needed. I hope this will be the last time, since I've been studying since September, but only God knows! Thank you again for your words!