Messaging an ex patient

[NewRMN21]

I just want a little advice 

im a newly qualified mental health nurse and work on a female acute unit 

An discharged patient(about 2 months discharged) has messaged me on facebook. While in the ward we had a good rapport while on the ward and I was wondering what the policy was regarding speaking to patients outside the hospital environment. It is not a relationship type at all purely platonic friendship. 

[Orca, ADN, ASN, RN]

I wouldn't do it. Mental health patients can be dangerous once released. They are notoriously noncompliant with medication, and they often have skewed perceptions. You were around this patient in a controlled environment, when medications were closely monitored and the patient was actively under a physician's care. Once patients leave, this tends to change, sometimes drastically.

I read a story of a nurse in the US who simply hugged a patient and wished him well as he left the unit. The patient perceived this as romantic interest. One night he waited in the hospital parking lot, followed her home after her shift, and killed her when she didn't return his advances. Other nurses have been stalked and assaulted by former patients.

Patients are also not "friends". They are customers for whom you provide a professional service. It is best to leave any contact within the confines of the professional environment.

[amoLucia]

Well said ^^^^^^

[GrumpyRN, NP]

Talk to your Charge nurse, let them know that you have been contacted. DO NOT reply to this person. You have no reason to and you can get caught up in any problems/drama they have ongoing, they may also try to guilt trip you. 

Also remember that facebook is not private and your friends will get to know that person and their health issues.

In the ward this person is a patient not a friend. Remain professional. Also have a look at the NMC Code of Conduct, I'm sure there is a bit in that about contact with patients.

 

[guest1163268]

Absolutely have no contact with this person. And absolutely report this to the nurse manager with an email and a cc to yourself! 

I don't work adolescents for exactly this reason. Unfortunately because of my looks, I have lots of female patients who have transference issues and I ABSOLUTELY will not be around them unless I have a witness or it's in an observable space. Even old female patients get up to the nonsense. You have to be careful! 

You don't know the pathology involved, even if the patient is completely sane and the contact is innocent, it can be misconstrued! And what about if there's a relapse? You would be so compromised! 

[amoLucia]

DON'T DO IT !!!   Above responses are excellent info.

I don't know if OP is male or female, so that could be a whole can of worms to worry about.

I don't understand the compulsion that so many nurses have re contacting ex-pts outside the work place. It's one thing if you ran into them at a tomato stand at the local farmers market. But otherwise, NO!

To quote TV NCIS Gibbs' rule "when the job is done, walk away".

[DavidFR, BSN, MSN, RN]

Agree with the above posters.

Psychiatric patients can often be "revolving door" patients and the time may come when this person is once again in your care. You are both compromised if you've had an outside relationship, even if it's just on facebook.

Even in the general nursing setting, patients are patients and the relationship remains professional. They're not your friends, they're only work.

I've been asked to come over for coffee, I've been asked out to dinner. I've politely said that my code of conduct doesn't allow it and that even if it did, mixing work with personal life is not a good idea for anybody.

 

Don't do it.