Men in Nursing

[Agnus]

I always correct anyone who referrs to a male collegeue as a "male nurse."

This will not revolutionize the world's thinking over night. Yet, we have to start somewhere.

The term "Male nurse" suggest that men in the profession are some how differently qualified. They are not. They take all the same nursing classes and pass the same NCLEX. There is no "male nursing school."

The idea that men should not care for female patients is redicilous. The idea that men should not be in OB is well....

S'cuse me the Vast majority of OB and or GYN physicians are MALE.

If it offends to have a man provide care to a woman who's medical issue is primairly OB or GYN then might I question why the person who's head is between the woman patient's legs is a male physician.

Think about it for a second. I am not suggesting that physicians are uncareing. However, they spend less time with the patient than either the nurse or midwife. Consequently a MUCH bigger part of thier time is not spent face to face but face to genitals.

Frankly I would think that a nurse who does spend time with the patient and who is holistically focused (by the nature of nursing) would be less offensive.

Have you never had the sense that when good ol doc is down there that the patient is seen as an object. Especially since he can see only a limited part of this person and it is not that part (face) that projects who this patient is.

Saying that women nurses, or older women nurse, or doctors, or any other catagory you can think of discriminates againt men who are nurses is falling into a trap.

When we refer to general catagories like these we failing to recognize and acknowlege that these are individuals not catagories that are detracting. This is what the detractors do. They catagorize men who are nurses. You can't win if you do the same thing your opponent is doing.

Educate. There are probably people out tthere that do not know that men receive the same education as women in this profession.

Educate your collegues, physicians and others. They probably never thought about it the way you do. Sometimes a word or two from a nurse can wake up these professionals.

[Dayray, RN]

Nicely put Angus

I'm sure people are reading this thread and saying "oh no another one!" I however like seeing these posts as this is a subject that needs to be beat to death.

If you are getting sick of these posts thats a good thing. I at times get sick of the subject but it is inevitably one that follows me around. Just as I realize that people will continue to ask me "so how did you (as a man) decide to be an L&D nurse" I realize that this subject is still one of interest to others and to myself really. I also realize that just as people continue to ask me that question there are still people on this board who aren't sure what to think of "male nurses" and some who feel that we are weird.

I have know that no matter how many times I answer the question or how many times I post on this board there will still be people that ask. For a while I was offended by it but now I just see it as opportunity to educate/make them see that I'm just a nurse.

So here I go again. I decided to be a nurse at age 18 got 1/2 threw the program and dropped out because my wife and I had another baby on the way and I needed to make more money. went back 8 years later. When I decided to start nursing school the first time I really had no idea that it was seen as a female role. I remember when I told my wife I'm going to go to school for nursing and she said "really? well ok". As I went to school and started working as a CNA I found out that men were not only less common but seen as strange.

When I went back the second time there was a student in my class that made it her mission to drive off all male students. I'm not sure why but she was a huge source of stress for the 4 of us and she nearly succeeded.

During my OB rotation I was told to take vitals and stay out of the way while my female classmates assisted in labors and cared for the patients. If it had not been for a great instructor and a very special patient I wouldn't have gotten to participate at all. The patient asked me to stay for her babies birth. I hadn't thought I would be allowed much less asked (after all I had been told that patients wouldn't want me). The patients nurse refused but my instructor talked her into it. I did stay and I loved it, to get to see how OB required so much of both medical and emotional care was awesome. It was the strongest nurse/ patient relationship I had ever experienced and I learned so much about interventions and the A&P of what was going on.

I was hooked and I really wished I wasn't. I wanted to be an OB nurse but I was a man. I had been an EMT and was planing on working in ER or ICU like all the other guys. After a few months I got up the courage to talk with my wife about it. I was worried that she would think I was crazy or be worried about me working with naked female patients. I was surprised that she (without hesitation) told me I should do it. I was able to get a job on post partum as an LPN while I finished nursing school.

That was a long tough year. I was the first male to ever work that floor and there were nurses who weren't happy at all. I wont go into details (as I have already in countless posts) but I was raked over the coals and humiliated in every way I can imagine by other nurses. It really messed with my head and I wondered if they were right. Was I doing something wrong by working there?

I stayed and it was because away from the nursing station when I was working with my patients things felt right. I had more positive calls to the patient feedback line then anyone else. I got card after card (some I dug out of the brake-room trash) thanking me for my care.

I did leave that hospital and now work full time on L&D at another hospital. My coworkers are nice and I haven't had any of the nasty things I did at the other place.

in the almost 2 years I have worked in OB/GYN I can count on one hand the patients that have not wanted me as there nurse because of my gender. Patients are sometimes surprised to see a man as there delivery nurse but most of the time they don't know that its unusual. the ones that are surprised don't stay that way for long. Still I know (from experience) that if those same patients were asked before they met me if they wanted a male nurse they would say no, as the asking implies cause for concern. I know with all confidence if you asked them after they would wonder why you asked at all.

People often assume I am gay and I just let them go ahead and think that as I really don't care. Some times its really funny too. there is a resident that moves when I sit next to him and wont make eye contact with me. I think he thinks I like him lol. I

Get the "why aren't you a doctor" thing allot and all the other things you can imagine. When I get asked the question "why did you become an OB nurse?" sometimes I have to take a breath and remember that it might be an honest question.

So to sum this all up again "male nurses" is a stigma placed on us by other nurses not by patients. While some in the public are unaccustomed to male nurses and believe some myths about them they are much less concerned with this issue then are other nurses.

I'm writing this post (and will continue to in the futer) for the ones out there that are trying to decide what to think about men in nursing. I also hope that it shows other guys that they aren't alone. nursing is not a female role. Being caring and nurturing are not exclusive to women. just as women can mother a patient men can be a father to them. It took an enormous amount of sole searching and personal evaluation for me to be ok with my self as a male nurse. hence the saying at the bottom of my posts.

[cawhappy]

I just started nursing school and the instructors have been pounding into our heads about the need to spell correctly as it is a direct reflection on our professionalism as nurses. I agree we should all be mindful of spelling as it does show lack of knowledge and/or laziness.

[CCU NRS]

Good Job Agnus and Dayray I couldn't agre more and actually just finished posting on the other thread that was what to do about opinions of male nurses.

[Agnus]

Originally posted by cawhappy

I just started nursing school and the instructors have been pounding into our heads about the need to spell correctly as it is a direct reflection on our professionalism as nurses. I agree we should all be mindful of spelling as it does show lack of knowledge and/or laziness.

When I first started comming to this board I was a student too. I was very critical of spelling and typos.

Then I began to realize life is too short. Yes, I am very careful about this in correspondence and charting.

However, not all of us are great typist nor even great spellers. This board is very informal communication and If I can understand the gist of someone's message I don't care how they spell or type.

Posters here offer their insights they are not required. IT IS FREE. If that causes you to value it less they so be it.

Life is too short to worry about a constant "professional" image. Believe me if you read my post regularly I think you will see the evidence that I present a highly professional immage where it counts.

Of course you count. However, keep in mind this board does not offer a spell checker. Posters' time is limited. Some posts are very long. If you feel I am unprofessional then that is OK.

Consider this as hastily scribbled notes between friends.

If you read this board enough there will be people whom you will wonder about as their grammar seems terrible. Some times it si because they are not american. Yet they are very fluent and well educated in thier own language. I challenge you to speak another language in a techincal field like nurseing and be understood.

Please lighen up. This is one place where we will not judge you if your spelling is imperfect.

MY daughter is a copy editor by profession. They are absolutely anal about getting it correct. That is thier job. Yet even she would say life is too short to worry about that in a place like this. The reason for copy editing is that NO ONE catches all thier mistakes.

I pay her company to do all my copy editing when it counts (which is most of the time) I assure you she has very little editing to do by the time she gets my work

Now was there something you wanted to say on the subject of Men as nurses? If spelling is your only issue start a thread on that subject if you must pontificate.

[cawhappy]

The only reason I posted a reply to your message was for us to be mindful of the fact that you never know who is reading our messages and it could be the very person you want as your boss. My message was not to be critical and apologize if you and others took it that way.

[Agnus]

Apology accepted and I understand your position. However, most of us have taken pains to insure our identy is kept secret on this site. Because as you said you never know who lurks here.

The last place I would refere a potential employer is to this site. They would have a hard time identifying me anyway.

I am an employer and I would not condem you for bad spelling a web BB. Relax you are among friends.

[cawhappy]

Thanks. I guess it is the teacher's job to scare the PJesus out of us new students. I find myself misspelling common everyday words on tests (words I have known how to spell since high school) and get marked down for it. I am just a nervous nellie. Thanks for understanding.

[sharann, BSN, RN]

Hey Dayray,

I thought your story was something else(a good something). I am a nurse who is female and I have paused at times when giving male patients assistance with a urinal. Some of our more seasoned gentelmen have difficulty with the jug because of "shrinking" in certain anatomic places. Well,I always ask if I can "help" get it in there. I also ask female patients if I can help, but not in the same way. I never had a refusal yet. I am outraged at the OB nurses you worked with. Just so you know, there are stupid nurses who are male or female, white, black, Christian,Jewish, Muslim,Buddist.....you get the point. NO ONE ever questions why a male DOCTOR dares to be an OB-Gynie. As for the # of "male" doctors who hate women and thus have chosen this particular field.....thats another thread for me.

Said it before and will say it again. I want a good, caring,competent, compassionate, andskilled nurse. PERIOD.

[Agnus]

Originally posted by cawhappy

Thanks. I guess it is the teacher's job to scare the PJesus out of us new students. I find myself misspelling common everyday words on tests (words I have known how to spell since high school) and get marked down for it. I am just a nervous nellie. Thanks for understanding.

That is why there are copy editors. As no one, not even your teachers catch all thier own errors. Just do your best and don't sweat it too much. You'll be fine.

Now I'll stop so we can get back on topic.

[tmiller027]

I'm a male student starting the nursing program in the fall. I'm taking anatomy and some other prereqs right now. THere's only 4 guys in my anatomy class and 3 of us are going into nursing. The women in the class have all been great, so I hope I don't have any other problems. I'm sorry some of the other guys have had problems.

Sounds like in my current field of law enforcement, my best friend is a female officer who works there goes through similar things being one of the only females. Anyway, some people are just impossible. I look forward to starting nursing school and learning all about this great field.

Tim

[CCU NRS]

Originally posted by cawhappy

I just started nursing school and the instructors have been pounding into our heads about the need to spell correctly as it is a direct reflection on our professionalism as nurses. I agree we should all be mindful of spelling as it does show lack of knowledge and/or laziness.

I won't harp I just have a couple of little things to say.

There was a study (don't ask me by who or why) that showed that as people continued to recieve higher education they had more trouble spelling small common words. The theory was that as we learn more of what my Grampa called "twelve dollar words" we are more aware of spelling these and making certain that we are using them correctly and spelling them right. So by default the small common words suffer.

2. I wil be the first to admit that I am typing as fast as I can and often make mistakes and often leave out those small words I was talking about, such as of, it, as, and sometimes even when typing I get my thought ahead of my typing and think/feel that I have typed the entire phrase and when I look back I left out part of the thought. I also have a bad habit of typing the wrong letter first such as cna for can or hvae for have. When time is not a concern I proof read my psots and fix these annoying little things but if time is a factor I post away.

Next on your next test read each question carefully and look for just the type of thing I mentioned leaving out if or of and small words mispelled and if you find one ask the instructor if s/he is giving extra credit when these mistakes are found and if not then it is hardly fair to take away point for mispelling.

Lastly I went ot my mailbox and looked but could not find an email I recieve awhile back that had this long explanation of how Americans don't even need al of the letters as long as most of them are there and we can make out the gist we continue reading and even getting ahead of the writing.