Latest Comments by vivere

vivere 2,738 Views

Joined: Sep 14, '03; Posts: 46 (50% Liked) ; Likes: 47
critical care rn; from US
Specialty: 20+ year(s) of experience in ICU

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    Quote from Ruby Vee
    I get it that you have a grudge against senior nurses. But a new grad is in no position to know whether or not she did a good job. New grads don't even know what they don't know. That's why they have preceptors. Sadly for you, most of those preceptors are senior nurses.
    Hey Ruby. I didn't get the impression that anyone had a grudge. I think people DO know if they have done their best, or not. Nursing is not just about the mechanics of nursing, to me. It is also about being a human being, making a connection with someone who needs your care, and trying to get along with the rest of the staff as well. I am a "senior" nurse, and I have also learned from new grads, about how to be compassionate to team members, how to go back and say "I think I came across a little harsh." I think new grads are already anxious enough, and trying to appear confident is part of it. Peace, Ruby Vee.

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    Note: To Kissunshine:

    I have seen this many times. Just remember to jot things down if you can, especially when you have a difficult day as you described. Be ready for management with your own accurate facts about what occurred and don't be intimidated by senior nurses. Sometimes we are just old hens, pecking at nothing in the dirt. You know if you did a good job. You have your head on straight. Let it go. Don't be surprised if the tables get turned one day and you have an opportunity to be the better person.

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    Fritz71 and MrsICURN14 like this.

    I'm glad you wrote....I understand what you are saying. Sometimes I have seen preceptors expecting the new nurse to completely take over the difficult gives them a break. I'm not saying it's right. Everyone learns at a different pace. Back in the stone age when I was new, we didn't have as difficult patients as we do now in ICU. It was still a lot to learn, and it took me a full year to feel comfortable, and even now, I am still learning. You cannot remember everything. Keep a notebook, or box of index cards that you can refer to, especially for the mechanics behind the equipment. If you have your information readily handy, you will become the resource person for others, even as you are learning. Nurses are greatful to the geeky among us who can pull out a policy, or a drug formula for reference. I still refer to our unit's "cookbook" when I am using a drip. I don't rely on my memory. We get busy, we could make a mistake. Always reference. Remember the basics. How does the patient look? You will learn to assess at a glance when you enter the room. How is their color? Does the breathing look peculiar to you? Don't rely on the shift nurses who came before you....when it is YOUR patient, it is YOURS, and even the most seasoned among us can make an error with IV pumps, rates, calculations. If you master the art of assessment, you will be amazed at how quickly you will succeed. I am grateful for your reminder. We do tend to get impatient, please forgive us, and don't let it stop you. The patient has a right to have the best care! So, don't feel frustrated with yourself. Turn it back on the preceptor....and then look it up yourself. You will be a fine nurse, I have no doubt.

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    carolinapooh likes this.

    Good answer above by Isabel. Sometimes this works, when it doesn't, I will usually just change the assignment. A fresh face will often make the patient feel as though they have some control, and often temperament has been dictated by an illness or situation in which the patient feels out of control.

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    carolinapooh likes this.

    This is a difficult problem in nursing. I personally see nothing wrong with what you did. Why are nurses so eager to be martyrs, allowing patients to be rude, curse, or in other ways "disrespect" them? I have had a few instances over the years in which patients who refused to be compliant with doctor's orders would ask for another nurse, i.e. one who would let them eat take-out food, not be hooked up to a monitor, and be on the call bell continuously for attention from staff. This is in an intensive care setting, no less! When the physician himself says to "have the AMA form ready" for the patient, there are probably going to be some issues. Hospital patients are just a cross section of our society. We are supposed to take care of all types of people, without regard for what kind of person lies in the bed. It remains a constant challenge, but if a patient is sane, and not suffering from an illness that affects the brain , I am just not willing to take any verbal abuse. Patient satisfaction is important, but if the nurse suffers a blow to her self respect, then what have we gained?

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    anotherone likes this.

    Great post, Jean Marie. Some things I hadn't thought of.....sometimes we are more cautious of new folks until they prove themselves to be "sane".....we have had more than one new employee come on board and welcomed them heartily, only to be faced with terminating them when they proved to be dishonest, or just plain cuckoo. It is great advice, just to hang in there....

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    Don't take it personally. If you ask a question and no one answers, it may be that they don't know the correct answer, and don't want to lead you wrong. It takes a good year to feel comfortable enough to think of yourself as a nurse, and it will be a lifetime of learning after that first year. You are right not to socialize much. Be polite, cordial, but I would caution you against becoming personal - I realize this may be an unpopular view, but in my experience, familiarity breeds contempt. Let them get to know you on the job and keep your personal life to yourself at this time. Old nurses .....I am one. I am frequently tired, have aches and pains in strange places and not much of a social life. Be happy. Continue to be nice, and use humour, it will serve you well in your career. And lastly, learn from these crones....LOL> As new people come on board, be the go-to girl. Be the one who they feel comfortable enough to go to for help, answers and assistance. I predict a great career for you.

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    I can SO relate to you, beeker. It is one of the biggest frustrations of my nursing career to have to deal with family members who either do not understand the visiting policy, or just don't want to! I had an intubated patient with pneumonia, and his girlfriend (who uses a wheelchair) had been allowed to sleep in the room for two nights before I took over his care. Our policy is open visitation during the daytime, and the unit closes at 9 pm for the night. After that, we do let visitors back by request, to check on the loved one or get updates, but we prefer to keep the room clear for patient care, particularly since the unit has less staff at night. At some point after I had done my initial assessment, the wheelchair bound girlfriend appeared at the bedside, box of chicken in hand, and settled herself in. I decided to leave her be, after speaking to the charge nurse about it. I gingerly let myself in and out of the room all night, taking care not to DISTURB the visitor! Occasionally, the visitor would ask me to be sure to shut off the lights so that she could sleep. When we did the patient's bath, we had to pick up chicken bones from the floor next to the bed. In the morning, I spoke to the visitor about our visiting hours, and told her about how we encourage family members to stay in the waiting room and check on the patient as needed. She told me that previously the staff was "nice" and let her spend the night. I apologized for this and told her that It was not our policy. About this time, the attending walks in and the guest asked to speak to him in private, of course. Not only did he make things worse, he gave the visitor money! He said he felt sorry for her, because she had no money! This guest had stayed in the room two nights before I came on duty, and was getting guest trays sent up during the day, and was also asking staff for help, snacks, etc. So, you might say, you get two patients for the price of one! I am frustrated by this situation. On one hand, I want to be helpful and compassionate to others and at the same time, I want to concentrate on my patient care, and not this kind of BS from visitors. I am open to any suggestions. It doesn't help to be undermined by the doctor, who now has made me seem like "the bad guy" . Why do we bother with policy if it is not going to be adhered to, and why are nurses so hesitant to speak to visitors about visitation policy? It gets harder to enforce the longer the visitor is allowed to stay.

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    Equestrian and Liddle Noodnik like this.

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    nursemike and leslie :-D like this.

    I just want to say thank you to all who took a minute to support me, or just to comment about a similar situation. It crushed me a little to have this happen, because I am very proud of my nursing care, and have always received good responses from families and co-workers as well as from patients. Perhaps I just need to develop a tougher skin, but I was so incredibly insulted by the suspension, that felt I had no choice but to leave. I think it was time for me to leave, the hospital broke out in scandal after I left, and perhaps it would have been even MORE stressful, so God took care of me by allowing this to happen. I now have much more understanding of how a patient complaint will adversely affect the staff, as well as how devastating it can be to have management that does not support the nurse. I still believe that nurses should ALSO have respect and one should feel that they can curse at a nurse, or yell at him or her, or in any way abuse the nurse, and the nurse should not feel her job is in jeopardy if she is the target of a patient complaint. Yes, I could have appealed, but at the time, my hot head took over...and I quit. It's all water under the bridge now. I feel physically better, I am sleeping better, and I am not stressed out on the way to work any more.

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    Quote from southernbeegirl
    omg we work for the same woman!
    LOL....i don't think so...but its crazy to think that just because someone has an advanced degree, they can move into management and do a good job. my manager had no clue. She loved to talk about how she loves ICU nursing, but she hadn't taken care of patients in YEARS! (thank the Lord)

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    Quote from Batman24
    Your manager is a moron. Consider this a blessing in disguise.
    LOL Thank you. I am considering it as a blessing and although I miss my co-workers, I am now relieved about the ending. I am still concerned about the pay cut, but got rid of my boyfriend also, so I will actually end up just fine. Lots of changes going on, and I am glad about it. Thanks for your support.
    memento vivere

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    P_RN likes this.

    It will take time, just remind yourself that they are missing out on knowing YOU, a really terrific person. Do not doubt yourself. Another positive route is to help out someone else the minute you see a need, no matter what it is. Believe me, they will quickly grow to love you. We are not much higher than the animal kingdom, who sniff each other out. So stand tall, and let the sniffers sniff....they will learn to trust you.

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    wooh likes this.

    Quote from scootertrash nurse
    people complain thats the short of it. But suspended ***! thats why auntie should of been made to leave if not regular visiting hours . if your care was on target the you peers should of backed you up but all and all probley did do you a favor to get out of that job
    thank you, my co-worker did back me, but she chastised her as well, didn't believe either one of us.