backstabbing co workers

liljsmom02 · Feb 26, 2006

is there a "soap opera" in every hospital? the bully on my floor is the only male nurse (the other two good ones left the unit because of the drama). last night our only LNA was in the ER because she got hurt. he sat on his rearend while i answered every bell, toileted all his patients and had to do a full bed change. i had a 7 pt assignment which included awoman dying of kidney failure and a young girl detoxing from heroin. i realized as soon as i got home that i didn't sign offf a nitro patch that i had removed so icalled the nurse who relieved me and told her so she could leave the med sheet out for me to sign when i got there tonight. so tonight i had a onw patient assignment because it was a one on one mentally challanged preson who just had surgery and was pulling out all of his iv's and tubes all day. i was relieved for a few minutes to call the surgeon. this nurse started ranting and raving that if i wasn't so concerned with calling my kids to say good night i would have signed the sheet off. he went on and on about people like me who spoil their kids.(by the way he's in his 50's and still lives with his mother) i didn't realize iwas spoiling my 2 yr old by telling him i loved him before bed every night. later on the surgeon called me back so i went to the nurses atation in front of the room to speak to him. my patient was asleep and i could see him. when i hung up the phone, the pt rolled over and started to slide out the foot of the bed. this nurse was walking by and watched me run into the room and catch the pt before he totally fell out of bed, looked me straight in the face from the doorway and said "wow that was close" and kept walking. when i lifted the pt's legs it startled him and he woke up and started kicking. he kicked me in the abdomen and the nurse never helped me. i am 4 1/2 months pregnant. i am okay but it's the point. what next, is he going to say i am spoiling my child by letting it spend nine monthes in the womb?

i apologize. i read this thread and needed to vent.

firstaiddave907 · Feb 26, 2006

i agree with you tweety .You stand up for yourself. You call them on every nasty move they make, if they make it to you otherwise you have to mind your own business. You don't give them power over you. You use the chain of command.

i would stand up for my self and anyways it sounds like this bully nurse needs a job change or an attitude adjustment

EDGRADNURSE · Feb 26, 2006

this nurse was walking by and watched me run into the room and catch the pt before he totally fell out of bed, looked me straight in the face from the doorway and said "wow that was close

Not only does this nurse make the work environment miserable (with his comments, etc) but he actually put you and this patient in danger. It's bad enough that people have to waste their time and energy "defending" themselves against such people but now it affects patient care. He should have helped you to protect your safety and the patient's safety. Glad you are ok.

smoke over fire · Mar 15, 2006

Ok these are all great posts, but how can I learn to confront someone without crying? It seems like I start of great and then the tears come out. I end up feeling miserable, and weak.

liljsmom02 · Mar 16, 2006

i don't know if anyone has suggested this or not yet but i say confront that person. bullies don't like confrontation. the bully in my post who wouldn't help me was actually confronted by another co-worker which caused others who have been in the same situations woth that person to also speak up. he gave his resignation.

funnygirl_rn2 · Mar 16, 2006

i don't know if anyone has suggested this or not yet but i say confront that person. bullies don't like confrontation. the bully in my post who wouldn't help me was actually confronted by another co-worker which caused others who have been in the same situations woth that person to also speak up. he gave his resignation.

I agree with you liljsmom regarding confronting the bully. At the previous facility where I used to work at there was one nurse & the unit secretary.....who both continued to bully whoever they could. I was polite and figured ignoring them, they would stop. They continued with their charades, and since I avoid confrontations, they continued, thinking I wouldn't say anything. I was missing mail out of my personal "In" bin and often I would not get a copy of the latest nursing minutes from our meetings and/or upcoming events etc.. I would ask the secretary if she had forgotten to place a copy in my bin like the other nurses received, she would say..."No, I put it in there". This continued & I told my nurse manager several times & she brought the two of them in her office & questioned them, of course they both denied it. A few weeks later I had enough of the nurse's bullying and the secretary not putting mail in my bin, then I asked them both to step aside that I wanted to talk to them. They both looked at each other & smirked. Once I got them alone, I told them both that I was tired of their CRAP & if it doesn't stop now, then I had no choice but go to HR and file a harrassment suit against the both of them and that I had been documenting their behavior towards me. They both looked at me, I think they were in shock,...lol. They both told me they were sorry (I know it wasn't sincere), but none the less, they stopped picking on me. The bad news is they continued picking on any nurse that was hired (young, old, new, experienced...it didn't matter). I eventually resigned after a year or so when that occured and found a much professional working environment with some great people. Best of luck to you.

Terika9 · Mar 25, 2006

Im a nursing who happens to work on a labor and delivery unit and I'm telling you that you are going to find those types of people at every hospital. They kinda have there own cliques. I've worked at three hospitals trust me I understand. Pray and move on.

LPN1974, LPN · Mar 25, 2006

Sometimes trying to talk it out with bullies doesn't work. There are those bullies who are going to bully until the day they die.

I work evenings, and we have 2 bullies on the dayshift, when they get together they talk about everyone else. They think no one else works but them.

Another nurse on days, who actually started out on evenings then went to days... got into it with one of these bullies. The bully threatened to slap her and told her that she if fell outside that door onto that concrete sidewalk she wouldn't stoop to help her up. The other nurse said she knew that she [the bully] wouldn't help her, and that she [the bully] has hated her since the first day she came to work there. The nurse being bullied has recently come back to the evening shift. And she is a joy to work with. I don't understand how anyone could hate her. We don't have any fussing and fighting on evenings.....I thank God that right now we have a wonderful crew to work with on pm's. But the bullies remain on the dayshift and some of their bullying does spill over onto evenings, because they like to talk about everyone.

I'm glad I am as far from it as I can get right now.

bughouser · Mar 25, 2006

I think taking the high road and remaining professional is always best. After first party communication, deal with your supervisor and get out of the loop.---Bug

k-yeager · Mar 28, 2006

My heart goes out to Liljsmom02. First i want to thank you for your dedication as a nurse. This world wouldn't be the same with out people like you. I hear your riggor and then find that you are pregnant and on top of that dealing with another nurse who should be assasinated, (I hope he's reading this...!) How can you be spoiling a child when you work a fultime blank blankety Jooooooobbbbbbbbbbbb!!!! Where is he? Let me at him? Just let me get my hands around his little dweeby throat! You just keep your chin up Superwoman, because that's what you are, a super woman! I predict that you'll have your baby and be out of there soon and somewhere that you'll be much happier. Good luck and God Bless you.

emilynurseaide · Feb 24, 2007

I am a nurse aide right now (starting nursing school in the fall) and have been having a similar problem. I get along with all the nurses on my unit and can tolerate and understand someone having a bad day. But there is one nurse on my floor who, in my opinion, is abusive towards me. She talks to me like a dog, snaps and me and gives me death glares when I work with her. I have told one of my fellow aides about this and she said that the nurse has bipolar disorder and is very moody and irritable. I work very hard and just want to come to work and care for my patients, not fight with people. Yesterday, I came home from work and cried after working with her. This is the first time in my life that I have had to deal with someone like this and I am really having trouble standing up for myself. She seems very volatile and I am afraid of what she would do if I did stand up to her. I want to go to my nurse manager, but part of me would be terrified if she knew I had complained about her because I know that she would confront me or complain to other nurses about me. I used to love my job and now I get sick before I go to work for fear of working with her. Does anyone have any advice? I'm really trying not to take it personally and let it roll off my back, but again, she is beyond nasty.

caliotter3 · Feb 24, 2007

Emilynurseaide:

If you are truly dealing with someone who is exhibiting mental illness, there is nothing you can do to change the situation with her. You have to work on your reaction to her behavior. And take the advice from the other posts on this thread. Document, document, document any contacts with her that are inappropriate. Avoid her as much as possible. And think about what steps you might be able to take to insure that it is clear that you are indeed following your job duties as you should. If you have to, take your notes on her treatment of you to the next supervisor. And learn some relaxation exercises, sounds like you need them, from being around her. Good luck.