male nurse

BJA · Nov 8, 2000

Buckboomer:

Yeah! What Shodobe said!

Charles said it well too.

buckboomer, BSN, RN · Nov 8, 2000

I have been a RN for 10 years. During nursing school, I had a very good experience in OB, and considered OB nursing. I was told, FORGET,it, even male OB docs are going by the wayside. I have worked agency, ER, and of course Med Surg. Ask other male nurses some of their experiences. I would get anyone over 200#, behavior problem, in isolation, or does not speak English. That was a given! I have taken anger management for men, Passive aggressive behaviors are rampant in nursing. Men and women communicate differently, and generally work together differently. I brought this up in another nursing discussion, and was told it is NOT cultural, but genetic. When I ask a female colleague for assistance, I say,"If it is not too much trouble, and you're not too busy, would you mind assisting me?" To another male I might say, "Get off your bum, I need some help here." I worked nights for many years, and often I was called to codes to lift, etc. I asked the nursing supervisor who is looking after my patients? In the area that I now work, ER, there are other males that have had many similar experiences. I choose not to go into great detail, but there are regular reminders in my work, that are almost daily occurrances. Nursing school was another place where there were daily reminders as well. I do NOT think my experiences are that much different from other male nurses that I talk to. Why should I leave the profession, because of my feelings, cynism, or expectations from my female coworkers? My problems and other male nurses agree, are NOT the patients, but our female coworkers. Back stabbing, bitching are not common in male dominated work places. They sure are in nursing, however. I am sorry to relay my negative experiences, but if this topic continues, I will divulge more. When nursing students were around regularly,"I asked why are you always asking me to help?" I was told, that I was the only one that would help. It has come back to help me numerous times as an agency nurse. The student nurses remembered me, and were, are very helpful to me now. Right now, with the shortage of RNs, we must nurture and help the newer in these difficult times. I would HATE to be a new grad now. I have learned to lower my expectations, so as to be NOT disappointed. I am not perfect, do not do every task, that I would like to accomplish, but have learned to do what I can. I do not need to be reminded by others. What about being told once in a while to a coworker, good job. Not, "Why did you do that instead of this." I am getting off target but, team work comes easily for me and other males. Lift your games, females and grab on to the concept as part of your practice. Now more than ever we must work together, NOT bicker. CIAO

shodobe · Nov 9, 2000

It is to bad that the nurses in your hospital treat you the way that they do.I never have had a problem getting any of the female nurses to help me in any situation.Now, I have no problem letting a nurse know that if they are relunctant to help me now then you know the story, "what goes around comes around".Most of the female nurses in the hospital know that I will help them the best I can and I don't always expect it in return.I have no problem letting them know how much I don't appreciate them ignoring me. I do have a reputation for being NOT suttle about anything and I know some nurses think I am one big pr**k.You know even my nursing school experience was positive, I can't think of one incident, except the time I went to clinicals and drove through a snow storm to find out I was the only one to show up!I really wasn't that dedicated.Like I said maybe you need to get into a different area of nursing.The OR is a place where males do well because they work so closely with MDs, who are usually male.The ladies tend to get yelled at more than me because the Docs know I can beat them up(just kidding!).We did have one guy try to work in OB here and that did not work out at all. He was very qualified, but the OB docs felt it was not appropriate, he left.Try to hang in there and don't let the ladies get to you. Mike

mustangsheba · Nov 9, 2000

Buckboomer: First off, I am female. Second off, I am small. Therefore, when I have to do something that requires height or strength, I go to the tallest person (leverage) and most of the time that person is another woman. I usually barter "help me with this and I'll help with your dressing changes". Which is a bit selfish because I love to do dressing changes. I do agree that working with a preponderance of females can be challenging. Keep in mind, we are from different planets and approach things differently. Ultimately, we are all there for our patients and we each bring our unique personalities into this arena. You're not going to like all your patients and you won't like all you co-workers, but teamwork makes it easier. I don't spend a lot of time talking about personal stuff with my co-workers. In fact, I feel lucky if I get a bathroom break and I can't remember the last time I took a lunch break. I promise you this, if you ask me to lend a hand, I will be happy to. MS

patches · Nov 10, 2000

I am going to graduate nursing school in 5 weeks and some of our best friends and nurses are in my class. I also work in a trauma center in the Emergency Dept, which have several male nurses. I used to wonder about why they chose nursing, but after becoming a nurse I realized that they chose nursing for the same reasons I did. I have learned many things from male nurses as well as females, but I feel males can be just as compassionate and caring as the next gal. I actually have been surprised how unstable a lot of female nurses are and that is kind of embarrassing for me as a female. Nursing is a profession and I as I further my career in nursing I am confused at how some of my counter parts behave.

sonnie · Nov 10, 2000

Hi Guys!!

I work in a small 40 bed hospital that employs approximately 30 RNs. Of these 4 are male and we have 1 male CNA. We love our guys and wouldn't trade them for the world! Yes, it is true men and women work differently, and sometimes it makes for fustration for both parties. We all work together for the good of our patients, but like I have said before that is one of the perks of a small facility. Some of our men would dearly love to work in OB and we "girls" think they would be a wonderful addition, but our patients did not respond favorably to this idea. We "girls" do not expect any more or any less of our male counterparts. We have managed to learn to work as a team. I for one would not trade my brothers in nursing for anything!!! They are part of the spice of nursing and should be embraced. Nurses who ask for help ( "Sonnie help me lift this guy" ) always get my help no matter if they are male, female, RN, CNA, MD, or ????.

MrRNMedic · Nov 12, 2000

Hi There! I've been a nurse for 2 years and in Pre-hospital as a Paramedic for 6 years. I think (and hope)that we as nurses are there for the patient's comfort. As a male nurse, I ask my female patients if she's comfortable with a male nurse assisting her with her bedpan or placing a foley cath. I give my female patients an option...and in the hospital, where most options are removed from the patient, they are grateful! I feel a great majority of patients are comfortable with male nurses, mostly from a gender stereotype of strength and confidence. I am either called "doctor", or I'm considered "gay" for doing a "woman's job". So what! Male or female, We're a team working toward a common goal...the patient's comfort. Chris

babs_rn · Nov 12, 2000

Originally posted by buckboomer:
Never had a bad experience as a male nurse? What a crock! I daily get bad experiences from my female colleagues. The problem with nursing is that there are TOO many women! We get poor working conditions, poor salary, pensions, and lots of responsibility. But now we have job security, WHOOPEE!

Job security? where do you live? Only a few short years ago, nurses were being laid off in droves! Now, with the profit-based corporations taking it over, they staff as minimally as possible and then send you home if it's not "busy" (meaning, busting your ass) forcing you to eat up your vacation time just to keep a normal paycheck. Hey, I'm a woman but I fully agree with you about the problem with nursing being the fact that it's got too many women in it. That's part of the reason I'm back in school to get out of nursing and into *ahem!* construction management.

Good luck to ya

Babs

fergus51 · Nov 12, 2000

The problem isn't too many women! It's too many bitchy women and bitter men coupled with sexist patients and doctors. I have always worked in female dominated areas, from libraries to the hospital and it is which women you're working with that makes all the difference. Some are great, some are horrible, just like the men. I think that male nurses are a great thing for the profession and patients who don't want them to be their nurses because they're men are as bad as rascists who don't want black nurses. What I can't understand is why do women have no problem with male gynecologists, but then don't want a male nurse?

We had 6 men in our nursing class and they all did fine on their rotations through ob/gynecology. I say men are a welcome addition. Maybe nurses will be taken more seriously when we have more men in our ranks.

sixela21 · Aug 7, 2012

This was truly moving, and so well-written! I myself have completed a CNA course last year. Mostly just to get my feet wet and to see if my passion to be a nurse was something I could do in reality. I have taken a year to think about it, and your post just sealed the envelope. Nursing IS for me. I have not been practicing as a CNA because as sad as it sounds, I can not afford to lose money, and I make more at my 2 retail jobs. I know the experiences would be extremely helpful, I just do not know how to schedule a third job in for myself as a single mom. Anyway... THANK YOU for this post, it was motivating and deeply touching.

Thank you so much for your kind response. I am really glad you enjoyed reading it. I completely understand your situation as far as "losing" money goes. I currently work with kids, and although it is rewarding, it pays next to nothing, and nursing assistant would definitely be more than just a step up for me, and I would also be gaining much needed experience while still in school. I'm so excited and very moved that this helped to solidify your decision! We all know money is a major factor because we can't live without it, but no amount of money can make you enjoy something you really don't have the heart for. Good luck to you and your son! =) Thank you so much for reading, take care.