Published Sep 23, 2013
YourHero
38 Posts
I've been with my girlfriend for about 2.5 years on and off and I realize that is difficult to maintain a relationship and be a successful nursing student. She never seems to understand the toll this program has taken on me and I somehow secretly wish she experiences it soon. She graduated school, but wants to cross over into nursing. If I'm studying and can't give her the attention then she must go out and hang with her friends. I'm not looking to control her, but I wonder how would it be if the shoe were on the other foot. I have a ton of work, and she changes her plans from wanting to cook to wanting me to get out and take her to the movies or bar. WoW
Mandy0728
578 Posts
Sorry to be so blunt, but get rid of her. My boyfriend knew from the day we met that I eventually wanted to be a nurse, as I was taking a few classes here & there. Now we've been together 3 years, we love together, we both have kids, and he let me quit my job so I can focus on school full time. I just applied to a BSN program for spring. Bottom line, she should be supporting you. How does she expect it to be if she wants to do nursing as well? She will experience the same thing you are!!
HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD
9,051 Posts
It would seem that you are at two different stages of maturity. Your focus is on education at the moment and hers is not. Maturation is not something that can be forced - it just 'happens'.
NICU Guy, BSN, RN
4,161 Posts
I agree with the previous posters, it is a maturity problem. She is unable to see the long term picture. You are attempting to better yourself and have a better future for the both of you. She is in the "me" stage of life. She wants to do what she wants, when she wants and you can't accommodate her whims. School is your number one priority. If she expects to be your number one priority, then there will continue to be a problem. If she is not saying "it sucks that we can't spend more time together, but I understand that you need to focus on school. If you need my help, let me know otherwise I will find something else to do while you study." then you need to take a break or go your separate ways. She needs to be your number one cheerleader and encouraging you to do your best and not put any relationship stress on you. On the other hand, you need to set aside "couple" time, even if it means an hour for dinner together or a couple hours to rent a movie (then back to the books) once or twice a week. Also involve her in your studying for tests (quizzing you or making of flashcards) and help writing or proofreading of papers. My girlfriend and I have dinner together on Wednesdays and then she goes home to let me do homework. Sundays it is out to eat or dinner at my house and rent a movie, then back to the books. She understands that it is temporary sacrifice for the good of our future. If I don't graduate, it destroys our game plan for our future, so she is doing everything possible to assist me with schoolwork and reduce my stress.
You made a real good point! Thanks for the advice!
dudemursebrah2b
14 Posts
definitely try to get ur points across and hear her out before you suddenly end it lol. good luck brah.