Leaving nursing

wandering_rn · Jun 4, 2004

Past employers don't give negative feedback. Typically when a prospective employer calls a former employer, they verify dates of employment and position. The only "negative" info they can give is a NO to the question on if you are eligible for rehire. And it sounds like you're not, so the former employer is simply being truthful.
How about not listing those employers on your job apps? Does the time frame allow you to do that and potentially explain that period of time with something else? (moving, new baby, school, personal reasons?)
Other areas of nursing to consider are ambulatory care centers, insurance, etc. One nurse I knew didn't do well clinically so she immersed herself in academia - and thrives as a pathophys instructor. There are many options.

Yes- past employeers do give negative information- especially in a small town like this one- they may not do it officially- but they do it. Yes, I could lie on my job apps- but this is a small town and people talk- I don't want to go somewhere- be doing fine- and then get fired for lying on a job application.

I am currently trying to get on with a hospice here in town, we'll see how it turns out.

Thanks for the advice and encouragement though.

barefootlady, ADN, RN · Jun 10, 2004

Please do not let these experiences determine your value as a nurse or your value to the profession. It may mean you have to drive a little farther to work, move a short distance to find a job you fit, and get some stress counselling. I am sure there are brighter days ahead for you in nursing. Best wishes for your future. Please, keep us posted.

wandering_rn · Jun 11, 2004

Thanks to all who have given me such great advice and tried to lift my spirits. I may have found a position here in the area I now live in- where I wouldn't have to drive an hour each way to work. This hospital seems very big on education- the manager who I'm hoping will hire me used to be the education coordinator- so she's very big into educating her staff and answering questions for people without critizing them for not alreadly knowing the answer.

So I hope all goes well with this. It's just very easy to believe the worst things people say about you sometimes- the real challenge is picking yourself up and not letting them get the best of you.

shel_wny · Jun 11, 2004

Thanks to all who have lent their sympathy to me- it does mean a lot. But I have decided to try and go back to school to learn something else- if I can. Yes, nursing may have different career paths in it- however I can't find a job within any field of nursing it seems. I have looked for a job for over a month, but when potential employeers go to contact my last two employeers- they hear very negative things. I don't know how to combat this negative information in interviews. Any suggestions?

To my knowledge, it is illegal for an employer to verify anything more than the date you started working there and the date you stopped working there.

I just researched it a bit and found this link that might be helpful.

http://www.getinterviews.com/modules.php?op=modload&name=Sections&file=index&req=printpage&artid=5

If I were you, I'd contact the HR person at my past job and call them on their bluff. If you're wrong, you just scared the hell out of them and you're not burning any bridges that were already there.

If you're right, the bad references just might stop.

If it's actually your listed references that are making the poor comments about you, find new references! Either way, keep your chin up. Nursing is very multi-faceted and all it takes is one new job to give you a good reference and boost your self-confidence.

Shel

mattsmom81 · Jun 11, 2004

It's just very easy to believe the worst things people say about you sometimes- the real challenge is picking yourself up and not letting them get the best of you.

You are so right. Do not allow these recent negative events to define you. You are much more than that and you will learn and grow...hope this new job works out for you!

nursemike, ASN, RN · Jun 11, 2004

Try to remember, also, that there's nothing like depression to undermine your self-image. You may feel pretty inadequate at the moment, but it's hard to do an objective self-eval when you're down. Even though it sounds like you have ample reason to feel depressed, getting rid of the depression can put the reason in a better perspective. A little cognitive therapy could go a long way toward breaking the cycle, but if that isn't available, I hope you can lean on friends, family, a minister if that's appropriate, or any support you can get to ride it out. But I wouldn't recommend any life-altering decisions while you're down in the dumps. Of course, if you do decide to get out of nursing for awhile, you could still keep your license current.

Many of my classmates and I have had major anxiety during our first year. For a while, I was mentally paralyzed with it. It's hell, but my instructors and friends got me through it. Bear in mind, I'm 47, so major life crises aren't a new thing to me. I didn't notice your age, if you gave it, but if this is your first experience with "failure", it probably seems pretty huge. In truth, it's a setback, at worst, and you will overcome it, one way or another.

Maybe you could talk to one of your nursing instructors, or even a past employer if you are on decent terms with them. Good luck.

nursemike, ASN, RN · Jun 11, 2004

On a practical note, my nurse manager and my instructors just love it when I "take ownership" of my errors. If you can tell an interviewer, "this is where I went wrong, and this is how I would avoid it in the future", even a fairly big mistake can look positive. Not that I would necessarily volunteer that there ever was a problem, but if you're pretty sure it will come up, taking responsibility pre-emptively looks a lot better than making excuses. And the problem could be as simple as, "I think maybe I wasn't ready for as stressful an environment as the ICU. I might have done better to have spent a couple of years in med-surg, first." Or something to that effect--it depends a lot on the actual problems. "My previous employers were jerks," sounds really bad, even if it's true.

wandering_rn · Jun 12, 2004

Thanks to all for their advice- it's nice to see nurses supporting one another rather than finding fault. I am still hopeful this new job works out- she said I was hired and that my contract was just waiting to be signed by her direct manager. Hopefully I will get a chance here. I am planning on taking some positive steps as far as educating myself- taking a dysrythmia class, planning on taking a critical care course- over the space of the next year. This new job will be in an ICU stepdown environment-which makes me a little nervous. But, the manager has assured me a 6 week orientation, plus she says staff here are very helpful- to quote her- "the only dumb question is one never asked" and "people who do well are the ones who ask questions". I'm hopeful that this will allow me to learn- but not be a trial by fire- as it seems so many areas in nursing are.

Also- I am getting counseling- this experience has left me shaken- I hate to admit it- but after the last nurse manager and the risk manager got through with me- I doubted my ability to be a good nurse. But I am going to give this 150%- and see where it leads.

Rep · Jun 12, 2004

Don't quit. Nursing is a career where one can be competent in one and perform poorly in the other. Try to look for a nursing specialty that would be comfortable to you and do your best to learn the ropes. Always be positive and learn from your mistakes. Good Luck!

mattsmom81 · Jun 12, 2004

On a practical note, my nurse manager and my instructors just love it when I "take ownership" of my errors. If you can tell an interviewer, "this is where I went wrong, and this is how I would avoid it in the future", even a fairly big mistake can look positive. Not that I would necessarily volunteer that there ever was a problem, but if you're pretty sure it will come up, taking responsibility pre-emptively looks a lot better than making excuses. And the problem could be as simple as, "I think maybe I wasn't ready for as stressful an environment as the ICU. I might have done better to have spent a couple of years in med-surg, first." Or something to that effect--it depends a lot on the actual problems. "My previous employers were jerks," sounds really bad, even if it's true.

Your post touches on what I was getting at too, and this is how I solved a problem with Group One stuff in my area. I took ownership of what happened, choose to spin the situation myself...I bring it up every interview and show I have grown from it. It took some practice to get comfortable....I did some role play with my hubby to get comfortable prior to the real interviews. Many employers DO appreciate an honest discussion and are willing to give someone a chance to show maturity and honest self evaluation skills..

It's generally NOT a good idea to badmouth previous employers..except in a few special circumstances where there is a competition and you know the new employer WANTS to hear bad things about your former employer...LOL!

To the OP: when I ran into negatives on my Group One and found I couldn't really do anything about them, I chose to deal with it head on like described. I initially thought about just leaving nursing too, but am glad I didn't.

Like the song says "It just showed me how much I can take." We do get stronger from these types of things IF we don't allow it to define us in a negative light. Best wishes to you. :)

wandering_rn · Jun 13, 2004

I keep hearing about Group One in the Texas area. What exactly is it?

Your post touches on what I was getting at too, and this is how I solved a problem with Group One stuff in my area. I took ownership of what happened, choose to spin the situation myself...I bring it up every interview and show I have grown from it. It took some practice to get comfortable....I did some role play with my hubby to get comfortable prior to the real interviews. Many employers DO appreciate an honest discussion and are willing to give someone a chance to show maturity and honest self evaluation skills..
It's generally NOT a good idea to badmouth previous employers..except in a few special circumstances where there is a competition and you know the new employer WANTS to hear bad things about your former employer...LOL!
To the OP: when I ran into negatives on my Group One and found I couldn't really do anything about them, I chose to deal with it head on like described. I initially thought about just leaving nursing too, but am glad I didn't.
Like the song says "It just showed me how much I can take." We do get stronger from these types of things IF we don't allow it to define us in a negative light. Best wishes to you. :)

mattsmom81 · Jun 14, 2004

https://allnurses.com/forums/showthread.php?t=60901

This thread discussed in the past covers some info on Group One for those not familiar with it. It pays to know what people will say about you when they don't think you will 'find out'.