I think I'm professional, but now I'm not so sure, after I told some American friends that as a male nurse, I don't catheterize women.
'That's sexist' was one of the kinder comments, while one of the more rational comments said - "We are professionals. As long as we behave in a professional way, then we should all have to do the same job."
I naturally asked 'does this mean we're nurses first, and men/women second?' and they didn't give a concise answer.
Am I the only male who thinks that it is harder for a female patient as well as for a male nurse to do such an intimate procedure?
Am I the only nurse who thinks that gender does matter? What harm does it cause if I choose not to do a procedure when there are capable people around who could do it just as well, plus make it easier for the patient. As a male nurse, I need a female chaperone if doing such a procedure on a woman anyway, so why not make it easier for everyone and simply keep the male out of it altogether?
But what does being a "Professional" mean? From what I'm hearing from others it sounds like I am a sexless machine capable of doing it all because that is what I am paid to do. Instead I think of myself as a caring carer. I have my faults and biases. I make mistakes and I sometimes let my feelings help make my decisions. But I have a big heart and I do the job because I care first. I enjoy making people laugh when they're sick. I enjoy being able to make a difference in people's lives. I also do the job recognizing my faults, and if I ever think that my views/faults may jeopardize a patient, I know to get someone else to take over that patient's care. I guess I'm not a very successful Sexless Professional. But I can live with being called sexist and unprofessional, just because I sometimes refuse to do female catheterization. I'm sure there's a lot worse things I could be.
A couple of extra points to mention:
For the record, the female staff used to ask me to catheterize the men, and they'd do the same for my female patients, and we never had a problem.
Also it's strange, but apparently I'm allowed to catheterize little old ladies, but not young women. Sounds a bit ageist to me. Do the feelings of older people not matter as much as those of young people? Naturally I'd never contemplate such a procedure on a young woman.
"I naturally asked 'does this mean we're nurses first, and men/women second?' and they didn't give a concise answer. "
The answer is yes. You are hired as a nurse. Your license says nurse. It doesn't say 'male nurse'. The pay rate, unlike many other fields is the same for men as it is for women.
You seem unaware that men won't talk about it, but many are uncomfortable with receiving care from a woman, they are resigned to it, because that's what they expect. I think refusing to perform caths on women is a dereliction of duties. Actually you seem to miss the mark on a lot of things from the male point of view.
It is quite responsible and self aware of you to examine your feelings.
The blessings of nursing are the countless options. With you working in schools, you've matriculated to a position that likely suits your strengths and also allows you to avoid daily dealings with direct, medical touch.
I think being self aware like you are is so important to be empathetic and provide good nursing care. However, I think we are forgetting how to provide patient centered care and tayoling what procedures we do to our patients. I think as male nurses, we are responsible to be competent in all the same care as our female counterparts. In that regard we are equal, but we do bring a different perspective and the male gender has a certain meaning in our culture. In cases of intimate care suck as catheters or peri care we need to ask the patient tpher preference. Script it iut. Maybe something like, " I am able to perform task x, are you comfortable allowing me to provide that care?". This way we are being professional, men, and not over tasking other nurses.
I will! say this though. As nurses it is our job to be comfortable providing care to all people regardless of how their anatomy differs. Maybe ask yourself why you are uncomfortable performing such care. Is it because you are uncomfortable with female anatomy? Is there an assumed level of being uncomfortable by the patient? Are you trying to legally protected yourself?
As a male nurse with 20 years experience I work like a male. I remember as an 18 year old student being sent in to help a 16 year old girl with a broken arm and full arm POP to have a shower. I was embarrassed, she was embarrassed, and I decided that I would not do the procedure. I spoke to my preceptor and said she would be better having a female nurse. I got some eye rolls, but she took the girl for her shower.
As a nurse we advocate for our patients. Sometimes the thing that is in their best interests is actually to have one of our female staff help them instead of us males.
I work all over our hospital but I choose not to do maternity as I feel that it is better for a new mother not to have some big guy come in to help them with breast feeding or check cervix dilation pre birth.
However, I do work with female patients and I will always tell them that if they need a female nurse for something I will try my best to get one to help them but it may not always be possible. Most patients are happy with this, and very rarely do I need to find a female nurse.
Farawyn
12,646 Posts
*holds the HCP*
It's a DNR. Just let it go.
Shhhhh...