am I wrong to be upset with this resident?

[Ms.RN]

okay. so here is the scenerio. i work in ltc and i have a male resident who always visits a female resident who is confused and have behavior problems due to her dementia. he visits her room everyday and talk to her. today this lady patient was in the dining room waiting for her dinner tray. all of a sudden, this male resident came to the dining room and told her to come to her room. for some reason it upsetted me, first because i'm trying to encourage her to eat in the dining room instead of alone in her room and second i didnt like him flirting with her all the time. so i told him to stop taking her to her room. was i wrong?? i mean i know they are adults and i have no business of seperating them or prevent them from seeing each other but on the other hand i feel like i have to protect this lady patient. please help!!!

[pielęgniarka, RN]

That's sweet :-) What great nurses and families to take an interest in their residents & loved ones and make it a workable situation.

I think it becomes very easy to forget that some residents still have feelings for the opposite sex. You know that old saying "Snow on the rooftop doesnt mean there isnt a fire still in the furnace" but I would definitely make sure it was documented and the families were made aware and almost pay special attention to whats going on when they are together alone. They do have privacy rights you know. Worked at a facility once where two residents male and female fell in love and they were always trying to be with each other and when they were found to be attemping sexual acts the families decided they should get married and they did and lived the rest of their lives together happy and sharing their room together.:heartbeat:D

pumpkin92356

[CapeCodMermaid, RN]

This is a delicate situation. While the man you describe may be cognitively intact, apparently the woman is not. Therefore she is not able to consent to his interests. Did she sign herself into the facility? Does she have a health care proxy and has it been invoked? Call the family and let them know what is going on. Talk to the man and make sure he understands the limitations. Certainly there is nothing wrong with affection IF she can consent. Otherwise it could be construed as (and probably is) molestation.