I never imagined...

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

I never imagined how potentially disturbing labor and delivery could be. I am not so sure any more that I am cut out for this. I had such an aweful shift last night. It would be inappropriate to discuss details here but I came home and got sick and wish I could wash it out of my head. I *know* that I need experiences to become experienced but I just NEVER imagined that this would be so hard. I went to nursing school to be a labor and delivery nurse... there were never any other options for me. Now it seems that I come off of every shift thinking that I never want to go back. :(

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.
Well, been a few days and I go back on shift today. I appreciate the encouragement to get back on the horse but it really wasn't like that. I accept that crazy bad things happen and I might just be that pt's nurse. My situation was involving an incomplete induced AB of a second trimester pregnancy. That is as nice as I can put it. When you dream of being a labor nurse, you don't think about the possibility of THAT.

I have been there, if it is what I think it is. And you're right....it's horrible, and hard, and heartbreaking. You pray you NEVER have to see it again. Hugs to you, honey.

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Specializes in OB.
That sounds difficult...

I've never heard the term "purpsurfer", what does this mean?

Purpsurfer was a screenname I had forever. Just a mix of purple and surfer... I am a florida girlie girl, what can I say. Decided that I wanted to change my allnurses screenname to something more "nursey". :)

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Specializes in ICU.
Well, been a few days and I go back on shift today. I appreciate the encouragement to get back on the horse but it really wasn't like that. I accept that crazy bad things happen and I might just be that pt's nurse. My situation was involving an incomplete induced AB of a second trimester pregnancy. That is as nice as I can put it. When you dream of being a labor nurse, you don't think about the possibility of THAT.

Hello there,

I am awaiting my letter for the nursing program and have always imagined myself working in L&D. Excuse my ignorance, but in your post are you referring to a fetus that died in utero? I was trying to figure out exactly what you were talking about and wasn't sure what AB meant.

If you are referring to what I think, that would absolutely be awful. I guess in our minds we all imagine L&D as this wonderful experience where the outcome is a beautiful new bouncing baby and elated parents and family and friends surrounding them.:crying2:

I remember when I was a teen a close friend of my Aunts was in her third trimester and the baby died. She actually had to go through the process of labor. I can't even imagine how awful that would have been. The worst of it (at least I thought) was that she had to continue to carry around her deceased baby inside of her for a week before the scheduled procedure. I can't even imagine:cry:

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"Purpsurfer was a screenname I had forever."

Ah...I see. Thanks...

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Specializes in geriatrics, L&D, newborns.

The really sad things is that most of the stress is caused by medical interventions in what should be a perfectly natural process. Just imagine if all women came into L&D already in labor (preferably close to the due date), and labored without constant monitoring, could walk around, could have food and drink, could get in the tub if they wanted, could squat on the floor if they wanted and were encouraged to labor without epidurals. Imagine if they had doctors who were not impatient to get home to dinner. Imagine if women were educated about the true risks of inductions or c-sections. Imagine if these women also knew what choices they had. They would have taken real classes and would have a supportive person to coach them through the labor. They would be eager to truly experience all that childbirth has to offer. I know, I am just dreaming.......:icon_roll

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Specializes in OB.
Well, been a few days and I go back on shift today. I appreciate the encouragement to get back on the horse but it really wasn't like that. I accept that crazy bad things happen and I might just be that pt's nurse. My situation was involving an incomplete induced AB of a second trimester pregnancy. That is as nice as I can put it. When you dream of being a labor nurse, you don't think about the possibility of THAT.

The situation you are describing is awful to deal with - been there. That you were able to make it through that is admirable - especially if you haven't been doing this for that long. Whatever the patient's situation I know that on some level your support and care for her really makes a difference - perhaps even more so than the "happy" OB situations.

For those who are new to L&D - the fact that you are stressed means that you are becoming cognizent of the realities of OB, not just the "Baby Story" picture. As you go on, you will become more confident in dealing with these situations, though I can't say they will affect you any less (nor should they).

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Specializes in OB.

I appreciate your words, Baglady! I have come to realize that if I quit everything in my life that I had a bad day at, I would have a pretty unfullfilling life.

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Specializes in OB.
I appreciate your words, Baglady! I have come to realize that if I quit everything in my life that I had a bad day at, I would have a pretty unfullfilling life.

That's the best attitude to have!

I've come to realize that those rough situations are the ones that I look back on and know that I was really doing what I went into nursing for and making a real difference for someone. Somehow, the more it "gets to me" the more important it is in the long run. The best growth experiences are rarely comfortable.

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The really sad things is that most of the stress is caused by medical interventions in what should be a perfectly natural process. Just imagine if all women came into L&D already in labor (preferably close to the due date), and labored without constant monitoring, could walk around, could have food and drink, could get in the tub if they wanted, could squat on the floor if they wanted and were encouraged to labor without epidurals. Imagine if they had doctors who were not impatient to get home to dinner. Imagine if women were educated about the true risks of inductions or c-sections. Imagine if these women also knew what choices they had. They would have taken real classes and would have a supportive person to coach them through the labor. They would be eager to truly experience all that childbirth has to offer. I know, I am just dreaming.......

Exactly. Just let me add that this is a possibility, people can have that care and you can be involved in it. Its called out-of-hospital birth :D!

Anyhow, I am also a new grad and when directly into L&D because my goal is to get my midwifery degree eventually. So, I have lots in common with Alisha and CrunchyLaborRN. Here is the deal-- don't change your mind based on the sad realities of hospital nursing, just take it all in as a learning experience. And to keep your sanity and view of normal birth intact take call at a free-standing birth center or work with a homebirth CNM if you can find one in your area. Thats what I did during nursing school and still do now occassionally. Its such a great reality check to how care can be. And just try to give the best care you can in your hospital work.

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Specializes in L&D.

I agree with the previous posters who suggest that you stick it out a while longer. Some things that may help you to do that:

1. Journal. Write about what happened; what exactly is it that upset you so much? What feelings did this event bring up for you?

2. Talk with a coworker. What happened, why did it happen, how could you have handled it differently, how has the coworker coped with similiar problems in the past? I suggest a coworker because it helps if the other person has the knowledge to understand what you're talking about. I hope there's someone at work that you trust enough to vent to. If not, perhaps a friend from nursing school. Even a friend who doesn't understand the details can give you a warm shoulder.

3.If it's about unit politics, there's not much you can do. Perhaps another hospital. All units have politics, some are just more toxic than others.

4. If it's about staffing problems, is your unit in compliance with AWHONN standards? If not, you could bring this up with your manager, or even better the hospital risk management team. OB has the highest lawsuit problem, if your Unit is not following our professional organization guidelines, it's risk is even greater.

5. Join AWHONN. Attend local meetings. Get as much education as possible. And network--meet nurses from other hospitals. See if what upset you is a common problem or one peculiar to your Unit. Advocate for best practices at your hospital.

6. Consider using your hospital's Employee Assistance Program. Most hospitals have a counseling service available to employees, a certain number of appointments paid for by the hospital. I've used EAP more than once and it's saved my sanity.

Good luck to you. At least after reading all the replies in this thread, you know you're not alone.

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Specializes in L&D, infertility, Level 2 nursery.

What does purpsurfer mean? (sorry, guess I'm just an old gal!)

I honestly think that everyone goes into L&D with a very idealistic notion of what it will be like (myself included, believe me!) and then your bubble bursts and real life happens. I realized after awhile that I couldn't always change bad situations, but I could at least be the patient advocate, the nurturer, the supporter...

Make sure you have a great team behind you and some good support at home (or at least a good therapist!)...good luck!

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