I don't know how I could've handed this differently

[remotefuse]

I was reprimanded today after a family complained about me. The pt is in the icu with sepsis and multiple unstageable pressure ulcers

Family members decided they would take shifts to call every 2 hrs, on the hour, 24 hrs a day to remind the nurse to turn the pt. Not only would they call to remind, but the different family members would also want a complete update on the pts condition. So after spending a lot of time with them over the phone, I told them, in a vey polite and professional matter that I would appreciate if they didn't call to remind me to turn, and to talk to each other more about updates. So, they were not happy at all

And escalated their complaint to the DON. I'm in my last month here, so it doesn't bother me too much, but I was very annoyed that I had to listen to multiple lectures on my behavior, but honestly, I don't know how I could've handled it differently. They were calling constantly and taking up so much time.

More of a rant I suppose since the situation is over, but I am curious about how others would handle the same situation.

[RJ 55]

I understand your frustration. I am a nurse and I have had family members repeatedly call to check on their loved ones and ensure quality standards of care. I have found that my designating one family member to be the recipient of information and the communicator to the rest of the family it does cut down on phone calls and questions that I have to repeatedly answer. I think that the family response isn't an attack on you or your nursing skills bit rather from the fear and stress of their loved one being in ICU. Maybe it is their only way to feel a sense of control in this situation. Usually I will encourage family to come and visit with their loved ones. When my sister was in a coma in ICU after a bad car accident, my mom and I would stay with her in shifts so that she would never be without one of us. It gave us a sense of control and peace in a terrifying time. I was not a nurse then but my mom was a medical professional. I was so grateful to her nurses that kept her alive and gave us information on her condition. It was heartbreaking for our family. The nurses would give us "jobs" such as rubbing lotion on my sister's feet or reading her favorite books or braiding her hair. It gave us some form of purpose and control.

[vintagemother, BSN, CNA, LVN, RN]

I understand your frustration. I am a nurse and I have had family members repeatedly call to check on their loved ones and ensure quality standards of care. I have found that my designating one family member to be the recipient of information and the communicator to the rest of the family it does cut down on phone calls and questions that I have to repeatedly answer. I think that the family response isn't an attack on you or your nursing skills bit rather from the fear and stress of their loved one being in ICU. Maybe it is their only way to feel a sense of control in this situation. Usually I will encourage family to come and visit with their loved ones. When my sister was in a coma in ICU after a bad car accident, my mom and I would stay with her in shifts so that she would never be without one of us. It gave us a sense of control and peace in a terrifying time. I was not a nurse then but my mom was a medical professional. I was so grateful to her nurses that kept her alive and gave us information on her condition. It was heartbreaking for our family. The nurses would give us "jobs" such as rubbing lotion on my sister's feet or reading her favorite books or braiding her hair. It gave us some form of purpose and control.

When my dear Grandma was in an ICU, I didn't call. I just went to her bedside. I wanted to get into her bed...but I didnt. I, instead, spoke with her nurse who was kind enough to explain her current situation.

[Irish_Mist, BSN, RN]

Calling every two hours is excessive and ridiculous and NO icu or floor nurse has the time for that. You did nothing wrong other than try to set boundaries. Stick to your guns.

[Irish_Mist, BSN, RN]

I'd like to answer, the pt did come from home where she was left in horrid conditions. Hair was completely matted and she smelled like she had not had a bath in ages. It was an incredibly sad situation. But that Just made it all the more frustrating when the family treated is that way.

Either this family feels guilty or they're trying to make it look like they aren't responsible. So their attempt at absolution is menacing the nursing staff.

[TriciaJ, RN]

Either this family feels guilty or they're trying to make it look like they aren't responsible. So their attempt at absolution is menacing the nursing staff.

Much more common than you would think.

[Elibri]

this gets to me-if a loved one is in ICU, why is the family calling? why isn't a family member at the bedside who could receive updates live and give updates to other family members? I rarely have time to speak to family members over the phone, so I keep it short, sweet, simple, and to the point very politely where they understand that they don't have to call, but instead would visit. like the other posters have said, we do have social workers and nurse managers who end up dealing with these kinds of situations, because they understand the nurses are busy.

Exactly. I understand that people must work, take care of children, and have little time for a variance in their schedule but how about having some of these family members rotate their visitation schedule throughout the stay? If its that important, someone will be there.

[Jennerizer, ASN, RN]

You can't even really blame admin because it's our govt that came up with these unrealistic patient satisfaction surveys in which the hospital always loses money because it is impossible to achieve perfection in healthcare when the survey is based on perception only.

Still though, the hospital should have a policy in place and back their nurses who are simply trying to care for sick patients.