I hate being a nurse

Nurses Stress 101

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Hey all. I'm really struggling here and need some advice. I am a new nurse at my first nursing job. I graduated May 2017. I just got out of the residency program at my hospital just last week. The closer it got to the end or orientation, the more anxious I got. Now that I'm off orientation and on my own, I'm absolutely miserable. I get paralyzed with anxiety before going into work. I work night shift on a cardiac/stroke unit, and I just wait all day making myself worried and sick until it's time to go to work. Even on my days off I get waves of anxiety just thinking about going back. I've thought about not showing up and having a no call no show so I don't have to deal with it. I'm so miserable. I hate it. I love everyone I work with and I they are all very willing to help as I work at a teaching hospital. I just don't think this is the right job or career for me. I don't want to quit because I think what if it gets better? I've been wondering what could I do with nursing that isn't this stressful and overwhelming?! I don't want to waste my degree, but the stress and anxiety I get working as a bedside nurse with 5-6 patients a shift is too much. It's crippling. I only have a few months experience as a RN, so I can't easily work somewhere else like a clinic. I just need something that doesn't make me feel like the world is ending every time I have to go to work. Please help!!

On 11/7/2017 at 6:45 PM, Nursenotslave said:

I completely understand how you are feeling. I've been an RN for almost 2 years now and still trying to find my fit and what works for me. Starting out I worked the night shift (11pm-7am) on a medsurg/tele unit. I've never had serious anxiety before in my life (except nursing school exams) until this job. I cried before work, thought about calling out all the time, HATED it and questioned why I chose this profession in the first place. I still question myself and this choice I made to be a nurse but I just keep telling myself that it's because I haven't found my place yet in the profession. I just accepted a new position in an MD office and hope to maybe go back for my MSN and become an NP in the next few years. The hospital craziness just isn't for me and I want to have a life again. I want weekends off to see my friends, I want to spend the holidays with my family, and I want to be human again. Nursing is NOT my life, it is just a part of it. I think the nights burnt me out really quick. They are not for everyone and I have NO shame in saying that they are not for me. Don't give up just yet. This is not a position that you have to stay in for the rest of your career. Just gain experience, take it for what it is and all the while, continue to look for something else. Find sanity in your coworkers and make the best of the situation. Hope this helps, and just remember that many of us know exactly how you are feeling.

I concur; I graduated in 2015 and have worked med/surg, community, and perioperative; in each, there was something to make me stressed, anxious, or consumed by the work. I kept hearing the recurrent phrase "nursing is not a career--it's who you are." Not for me. I was a person with an education separate from my nursing degree, and feeling like my identity was consumed by my work is a horrible situation mentally and emotionally. In each workplace, from small hospitals to big city, I've been thrown in despite a lack of confidence, wound up shortstaffed in every environment imaginable, and told that "this is just how it goes." Now I try and consider what I can add to my learning in each environment, instead of constantly telling myself that I'm not good enough or I'm failing at this somehow. Don't give up--just try and learn and decide what is and isn't for you. It does get easier.

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Specializes in Surgical Specialty Clinic - Ambulatory Care.

I agree with everyone here saying that if you stick with it; it will get better. And it is true that most of us felt this way our first year or two as a nurse. I would argue that I still have these feelings but have learned to push them away. More importantly is the question as to if it is valuable to your life to continue to put yourself through this? Like just because you can learn to live in the hostile, depressing world that is medicine doesn’t mean it is best for your life. As someone who stuck with it, and still is a decade later, I can tell you the advantages are that I don’t ever have to worry about having some kind of income. But that is really the only advantage. I would like to tell you that helping others was this soul fulfilling experience, that improving my nursing skills and abilities have lead me to want to do more, and that I can’t see my life without identifying myself as a nurse; but I can’t. Nursing has made me like humanity less, made me disillusioned by what passes for healthcare in the USA, and a decade out has left me emotionally bankrupt. I don’t even see myself anymore when I look in the mirror. I say leave now, as much money as you can make as a nurse and as nice as it is having no worries about the ability to have an income; it isn’t worth the loss of myself. I say leave or see if you can do Home Health or a clinic now.

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Specializes in Surgical Specialty Clinic - Ambulatory Care.

Sorry

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If you can survive you may be happy later on that you took the position, because it can help you get a better position or the one you want. Very few nursing positions are a bed of roses, minus the thorns. Stay for 6 months and transfer to another position in the hospital. I know the feeling. I worked on an oncology/medsurg floor in the inner city and it was challenging but I overcame my struggles. Anyone who has viewed my resume has always commented on how useful the experience was and how it applied to me getting future positions. Make your money and plan your escape. However if you just can't take it, then go but weigh the decision carefully.

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On 7/24/2018 at 12:17 AM, matwpac7 said:

Hi KNC

I want to begin by saying I know EXACTLY how you feel. Second, I want to say QUIT NURSING RIGHT NOW BECAUSE IT DOES NOT GET BETTER.

I'm on my 8th year as a nurse and I literally just googled "I hate being a nurse" and found this thread. It's been nice to read some comments from people who are on our level. Some think they are, but not really. After 8 years working everywhere from ED, LTAC, Med Surg, Pre Op, PACU, Clinic I can say without a doubt I ******* haaaate nursing. It's the biggest mistake of my life and my only advice is to get out ASAP. I've moved around many times hoping that there really is a good fit for me and I've been disappointed every single time. Unfortunately for me, I've dug quite a big financial hole and I can't just quit and work a lower paying job. I've very much ****** myself and I'm desperately trying to find a way out.

I feel your pain more than you could ever know. Do what I haven't had the guts to do and leave nursing and your degree in the dust behind you.

Yes! I agree... I became an LPN in '08 and I feel the exact same way, like I made a mistake choosing nursing. I wish I had chosen a different career path when I went in to nursing (radiology, teaching, business, anything really but nursing)... I decided to get my medical coding certificate in 2016 in hopes of working from home as a medical coder, but haven't sat for the CPC-A yet, so I'm not working in coding yet. I'm hoping to in the near future possibly. I am also currently substitute teaching at my youngest child's school, and taking classes towards a degree in teaching now, incase the coding falls through. My husband says I am all over the place with my career and education. Maybe he's right, but I will have my Associate in applied science of teacher education this May. I plan to continue to get my bachelors in teaching over the next few years as well. Everyone who knows me has basically put me down saying, "you're an LPN, why on earth would you throw all of that education away and not want to work as an LPN?! Why do you keep changing career paths?!" I'm tired of people saying that to me... It's really no one else's business. I have learned do what YOU want to do in life that makes you happy! Don't listen to others! If you do, you'll never get ahead. If you loathe nursing, and can't find your fit, change careers! Your health & body with thank you in the future when you aren't sick with stress... I wouldn't have my Associate degree in teacher education this May if I had listened to everyone else.

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Nursing is one of the most respected professions out there to those that are on the outside looking in. Little does anyone tell you that caring for sick people 12 hours a day is mentally exhausting (not to mention physically). I have worked in about 3 different clinical nursing settings, and now I work in an office environment. My job is mind-numbingly boring, but at least i don't have the stress of having to cater to demanding patients all day (sadly that is what ER nursing has come to in most cases). I am looking every day for a transition out of nursing. If I could go back and do it all over again, I NEVER would have even considered nursing. Sadly, I'm making too good of money to leave and do something I might actually enjoy.

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On 7/29/2019 at 9:22 AM, andreasmom02 said:

Yes! I agree... I became an LPN in '08 and I feel the exact same way, like I made a mistake choosing nursing. I wish I had chosen a different career path when I went in to nursing (radiology, teaching, business, anything really but nursing)... I decided to get my medical coding certificate in 2016 in hopes of working from home as a medical coder, but haven't sat for the CPC-A yet, so I'm not working in coding yet. I'm hoping to in the near future possibly. I am also currently substitute teaching at my youngest child's school, and taking classes towards a degree in teaching now, incase the coding falls through. My husband says I am all over the place with my career and education. Maybe he's right, but I will have my Associate in applied science of teacher education this May. I plan to continue to get my bachelors in teaching over the next few years as well. Everyone who knows me has basically put me down saying, "you're an LPN, why on earth would you throw all of that education away and not want to work as an LPN?! Why do you keep changing career paths?!" I'm tired of people saying that to me... It's really no one else's business. I have learned do what YOU want to do in life that makes you happy! Don't listen to others! If you do, you'll never get ahead. If you loathe nursing, and can't find your fit, change careers! Your health & body with thank you in the future when you aren't sick with stress... I wouldn't have my Associate degree in teacher education this May if I had listened to everyone else.

Yes, you are all over the place! And you have done the right thing. Find what makes you happy and go on your own path. The medical system and nursing as well is in such a different direction than years ago. ( I am an old retired nurse). It is sad to see so much talent and dedication walk out the door of nursing. But your health and the needs of your family are most important. So the choices you make now are right for you , your family and considering the current everchanging job landscape. My personal feeling is that if all the levels of nursing (LPN through the Doctorate level) do not speak with one voice firmly , the work conditions will remain short of staff etc. The focus should remain on patient safety , and nurses all need to speak with one voice to improve conditions. Failing improvements ,it is up each individual to decide whether continuing in nursing is what is best for them...

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