I Don't Know What I'm Doing With My Life

MarkMyWords · May 2, 2020

Maybe this will pass in time. I am not a nurse. But don't let your own distress stop you from working as a psych nurse if that's what you most want and can get the job. If you change your mind, that's okay too, and take classes toward another specialty with less patient contact. Not a hospice. Can you work part-time?

And don't feel guilty because you are not working in the pandemic. Do what is best for you...old advice admonition.

cgwleung · May 6, 2020

CONGRATS ON YOUR GRAD!

It's a challenging time for you and I've experienced similar situations where I've been forced to make those tough decisions.

A lot of your emotions stem from lack of clarity and perhaps the confidence to go forth in truly what you want.

I transitioned through many careers, and ended up in nursing not because I 'chose' to become a nurse, but it was a way out of my previous career. As a result, I didn't fix the root problem. Instead, I just covered it up which is the worst thing we can do for ourselves when it comes to life changes.

Now, in addition to nursing, I help health care providers by coaching them to eliminate their mental struggles so they can live their life's mission. However, it took some time for me to reach this point of clarity.

Everything happens for a reason. Life tends to give us these crazy unsurmountable challenges as a way to see if you can 'level-up' to the next big thing. If you can't overcome those challenges then life will push the same challenge on you until you get it. See these as an opportunity, not as a detriment. You're worth it!

I'll do my best to you help you here by asking you some questions to clarify what you TRULY mean:

On 4/28/2020 at 11:19 AM, Elisabeth-33 said:
I want to work as a psych RN for about a year to get some nursing experience, as I didn't work before

Didn't you graduate as a licensed NP? Help us understand why you would want to practice as an RN and not as an NP.

On 4/28/2020 at 11:19 AM, Elisabeth-33 said:
I'm currently doubting myself and my abilities

Your nursing abilities or is this coming from the fact its difficult to land your dream job?

On 4/28/2020 at 11:19 AM, Elisabeth-33 said:
I'm feeling anxious and depressed that I'm not doing anything right now, especially during the pandemic, while other people in school with me are working as nurses or getting NP jobs.

You need to remember that you can't compare YOUR story with someone else's story. It's not fair to yourself and the other party (if they're getting the shorter end of the stick). When you're comparing yourself to others, you give PERMISSION to that person to dictate how you feel. You also don't know the other party's story. They could've simply had better connections or maybe tried 100000x before landing that job. Have you navigated other areas of your practice just to get yourself started?

On 4/28/2020 at 11:19 AM, Elisabeth-33 said:
I hate that I chose to go into psych when I can't even handle my own mental health

From the sounds of things, this is your area of weakness and perhaps you might need to take some extra measures to strengthen that area. This includes reading books on mindset, meditating, journaling, etc. What are you currently doing to manage your mental health?

I say these things because I went through the same self-doubt, emptiness, and poor self-image, but I decided that enough was enough. YOU have to give yourself PERMISSION to move forward and STOP dwelling on what you don't have. Focus on what you DO have because you have so much to offer.

Lastly, we're humans. We love contextualizing our misfortunes and that's okay. Ask yourself: How long have you been in this rut? When are you going to move forward from this rut? Then, what can you do NOW to move yourself forward?

I hope this helps you gain some insight in where you're currently at. We respect your vulnerability during these challenging times.

Best,

Calvin

Elisabeth-33 · May 7, 2020

On 5/5/2020 at 11:28 PM, cgwleung said:
CONGRATS ON YOUR GRAD!
It's a challenging time for you and I've experienced similar situations where I've been forced to make those tough decisions.
A lot of your emotions stem from lack of clarity and perhaps the confidence to go forth in truly what you want.
I transitioned through many careers, and ended up in nursing not because I 'chose' to become a nurse, but it was a way out of my previous career. As a result, I didn't fix the root problem. Instead, I just covered it up which is the worst thing we can do for ourselves when it comes to life changes.
Now, in addition to nursing, I help health care providers by coaching them to eliminate their mental struggles so they can live their life's mission. However, it took some time for me to reach this point of clarity.
Everything happens for a reason. Life tends to give us these crazy unsurmountable challenges as a way to see if you can 'level-up' to the next big thing. If you can't overcome those challenges then life will push the same challenge on you until you get it. See these as an opportunity, not as a detriment. You're worth it!
I'll do my best to you help you here by asking you some questions to clarify what you TRULY mean:
Didn't you graduate as a licensed NP? Help us understand why you would want to practice as an RN and not as an NP.
Your nursing abilities or is this coming from the fact its difficult to land your dream job?
You need to remember that you can't compare YOUR story with someone else's story. It's not fair to yourself and the other party (if they're getting the shorter end of the stick). When you're comparing yourself to others, you give PERMISSION to that person to dictate how you feel. You also don't know the other party's story. They could've simply had better connections or maybe tried 100000x before landing that job. Have you navigated other areas of your practice just to get yourself started?
From the sounds of things, this is your area of weakness and perhaps you might need to take some extra measures to strengthen that area. This includes reading books on mindset, meditating, journaling, etc. What are you currently doing to manage your mental health?
I say these things because I went through the same self-doubt, emptiness, and poor self-image, but I decided that enough was enough. YOU have to give yourself PERMISSION to move forward and STOP dwelling on what you don't have. Focus on what you DO have because you have so much to offer.
Lastly, we're humans. We love contextualizing our misfortunes and that's okay. Ask yourself: How long have you been in this rut? When are you going to move forward from this rut? Then, what can you do NOW to move yourself forward?
I hope this helps you gain some insight in where you're currently at. We respect your vulnerability during these challenging times.
Best,
Calvin

Thanks for your response. I'm trying to find a psych RN job to work on my nursing skills and gain experience. Even though I graduated with a master's, many places consider RN experience when hiring. Since I didn't work as an RN while in school, I want to make sure I'm actually putting skills to work and doing it now. In addition, I have to study for boards and I want to expand my knowledge about child/adolescent psych in particular.

Red Shirt 6, CNA · May 7, 2020

If I understand correctly you are over qualified/educated for the experience jobs you want. you want to work at for a year. your main Interest is a future with child/adolescent as a specialty.

Most employers are going to want more than a year. So I will suggest looking for fixed term and or focus on locations and employers that have a harder time getting qualified people. As for the specialty I would find a mentor read through the specialties section on this site before I stress myself out trying to ask the perfectly phrased question.

madeline125, BSN · May 8, 2020

Elisabeth-

I feel this in my bones. I am a new grad BSN (Dec. 2019 graduate) who chose not to work during school to focus on academics and nursing -related extracurricular activities. After a long-awaited opportunity fell out from under me in mid-March, peak pandemic, I scrambled and started applying everywhere I could. It has been a month and a half since I started applying. Although I am very happy for them, I am just shattered when I see my former classmates posting their "nurses week/covid hero" pictures and I am at home, unemployed. Not where this honors student thought she would be!!

I fear that it is because my classmates spent more time being a CNA in a hospital while they were a student instead of focusing on academics. I applied to 8 jobs, and I have 3-4 maybes/hopefuls, and a couple in the works. I was recently rejected from a few as well. What do you think is a reasonable amount of hope/realism when it comes to how many jobs do you have to apply to even get an interview? Why did my classmates all get jobs right out of school, was it timing because it was pre-covid? Or am I just not aware that most people go through this because they only advertise success on social media?

Also, my mental health tenuous at best. I can relate to the deep feelings of doubt about skills and abilities. I am doubting everything at this point!!

I did hear that mental health care professionals will be the next frontline workers to have their moment. I know for one that NP's are the best type of psych professional out there, you guys are rare as unicorns! I want you to succeed :)

barcode120x, RN, NP · May 15, 2020

On 5/7/2020 at 10:12 PM, madeline125 said:
Why did my classmates all get jobs right out of school, was it timing because it was pre-covid? Or am I just not aware that most people go through this because they only advertise success on social media?

Multiple factors affect one's ability to a job. Big two are prior hospital experience and the most important, networking. It might feel hard to get a job during this COVID crisis because many cities across the US were not hit "as hard" as the center of NY. Like my place in SoCal isn't hiring at the moment because we are way overstaffed and due to the stay at home orders, patient census is low aside from the somewhat decent about of covid patients. This means less money for the hospitals which means they're losing money.

2020 and the last few years has seen social media exponentially grow and become a big part of each person's life. You just need to take control of it and stop comparing yourself to others and looking at other's success and focus on yours, even if you success is lagging a bit behind. No good comes from focusing on others' success.

Guest1142305 · Jun 5, 2020

On 4/28/2020 at 1:19 PM, Elisabeth-33 said:
Hello everybody
I'm graduating from the OSU grad entry NP program on Sunday with a masters in psych/mental health nursing. During the grad entry program (3 years), I made the personal decision not to work to focus entirely on school. I got my RN license after a year and a half in the program and traveled for clinicals both fall and Spring semesters.
Now that I'm done with school, I want to work as a psych RN for about a year to get some nursing experience, as I didn't work before. Other people in my cohort are going straight into being an NP. I'm proud of them, but I'm currently doubting myself and my abilities. It also doesn't help that many of the jobs I'm looking at want someone with a BSN.
I know I'm young (just turned 25) and this is my first career ever. I'm feeling anxious and depressed that I'm not doing anything right now, especially during the pandemic, while other people in school with me are working as nurses or getting NP jobs. I feel lost and that I made a horrible decision going through all of this schooling. I hate that I chose to go into psych when I can't even handle my own mental health. I know what I'm supposed to do to help myself, but I just want to know if there's anybody else out there who has experienced something similar and can share their thoughts.

Apply to a pmhnp residency. There is one at medical college of Wisconsin.