I am at a crossroads. I have just been accepted to an accelerated BSN

[texcat]

I am at a crossroads. I have just been accepted to an accelerated one year BSN program at a great University and I just learned from my boss that I am most likely to be promoted to a higher position in my current career. I don't know which way to take.

I am scared that I will not enjoy nursing even though I love blood and guts and all things medical. I just don't love people all that much. I always say that I would rather be a nurse to animals. However, I am really interested in possibly becoming a hospice nurse, a forensic nurse, oncology nurse...woman's health. I think I am just afraid of the unknown as I always am, even though every move I have made career wise has been a good one. I should trust myself by now. I am afraid of not having an income for a whole year and starting over in a new career.

My reasons for wanting to go are my love of medicine and a need to help people, to feel fulfilled at the end of the day that I am helping someone. I am tired of the monotony of my current desk job. The same cycle every month. I work in Research Protection for three different research committees (animal care and use, biosafety and hazardous substances). It is very interesting work from the outside looking in and when I describe it to someone, I feel very important, but the day to day minutia of it drains me. I feel my mind turning to mush. There is the possibility of moving up to a management position but not a sure bet. Even if I move up to that, will I enjoy it? Or is it just the feeling important and wearing cute outfits that I enjoy? Sad but true...Oh, and the paycheck is not bad either. But that is no reason to stay where you are.

I want something that is different every day that is hands on - not sitting on your rear all day behind a computer. I am just scared. I have worked in the medical center for 10 year, half of that time as a research coordinator in clinical research studies where I had patient contact daily. I loved working with breast cancer patients. I have a great background in research administration.

I am so scared to take a chance on nursing. I feel like I am not confident enough to handle some of the cockier doctors and some of the intensity of the job.

I have to make a decision soon so that I can offer up my spot to someone else that wants to attend school if I decide that is not what I want to do.

HELP!

[Emile]

Go for it!!! It's better to try and realize you don't like it than not try and wonder or regret for the rest of your life.

[MiahMSN, MSN, RN]

I'm so confused. You don't love people all that much but you love working with breast cancer patients and you're interested in women's health and oncology - huh?!?! You must mean the research side of nursing. If you don't love people all that much, you don't need to go into nursing, LOL, I'm sorry.

Yes, you can do the behind the scenes type work, such as research, but you will have to start off working and caring for people, even if it's only in clinicals during school.

Not that this is you, as I don't know you on a personal level and I'm sure you're a great person with a good heart, but I never understand why those that lack compassion, empathy, communication and any type of personable skills whatsoever......or those who just don't like helping others in need.....get into nursing?!?! It's like why make yourself, patients and those who really love this profession, miserable by being a nurse?!?!

[texcat]

Mya2bRN - thanks for being blunt and picking up on that comment. It's not that I do not like people, I think it is that people can affect me so tremendously at times. They intimidate me and can cut through me with their words, especially when they are very blunt. :)

I totally see your point though. You should be a nurse because you truly love working with and caring for people and if you don't then you shouldn't do it. For some reason, I keep thinking that it is an option that I should really consider but how do I rationally consider it when I feel this way?

I believe that I am better on the amdin side of things. Thank you for your comments. This is how people that should not be nurses end up in the profession...we look good on paper. :)

I did enjoy working with the breast cancer patients though. I felt for them. My patients were indigent, and did not speak English. They really really NEEDED someone to care for them. I was able to speak to them in Spanish and provide the education they needed and the care. However, not being a nurse, I could only go so far. I just felt that as a research coordinator, just taking data and not caring for them went against what I felt. I wanted to help them, not see them as data.

I guess you are more confused now than you were when you read my first post! I know I am.

Geez...

[MiahMSN, MSN, RN]

LOL - well, I probably shouldn't have said that you should not go into nursing. Maybe you would find you place within nursing as being most fulfilled in administration, where maybe you can assist in policy change that would benefit the type of patients you described above. I work for a public health care plan and we have nurses who work as directors and administrators within the organization who do exactly that! The great thing about this profession, is that there are soooooo many avenues to take, one does not have to be limited to bedside/direct-patient care nursing, although that can be the perfect niche for some! I definitely wouldn't count it out, as I think there is a place for you and what you want to do, within nursing; it may just take a little more research to determine that spot! And as far as staying in your current position, congrats on the expected promotion. However, I would think about your ultimate career goals and where you can go in your current position/field that will give you the satisfaction that you are looking for.

I know it's a lot to consider, a big commitment and sacrafice, so it's good that you are asking these questions of yourself and others! Best of luck, and congrats on getting into a program!

[Pmkn10RN]

It's not that I do not like people, I think it is that people can affect me so tremendously at times. They intimidate me and can cut through me with their words, especially when they are very blunt. :)

The patients you encounter, your classmates and instructors in nursing school, as well as your co-workers when you graduate can affect you tremendously. Just know that's a part of nursing and if you're ok with then go for it! Just let people's harsh words and bluntness roll off your shoulders (easier said than done I know).

[texcat]

Thanks y'all for responding and giving me your input. I have scheduled a time to go in and talk to the university staff about this issue to make sure that I am making the right choice. THANKS!