How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

Published Apr 19, 2003

by spineCNOR

HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?

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Golden Retriever:

The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

Border Collie:

Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

Dachshund:

You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

Rottweiler:

Make me.

Boxer:

Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

Lab:

Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

German Shepherd:

I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

Jack Russell Terrier:

I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

Old English Sheep Dog:

Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb?

Cocker Spaniel:

Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

Chihuahua:

Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

Pointer:

I see it, there it is, there it is, right there...

Greyhound:

It isn't moving. Who cares?

Australian Shepherd:

First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

Poodle:

I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

The Cat:

"Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is: How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?"

ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF.