How to manage other students who rely on your notes and study guides?

[FutureNICUnurse88]

To give context, I came into nursing school with no study habits. Failed my first semester came back the next year, did a lot of growing up and now I consistently gets 90s on my exams. (Praise the Lord) 

I love helping others In my class if they are struggling cuz I've been there and have a solid routine of studying now. I make a big study guide for each exam. Half of what makes it helpful for me is just creating it since rewriting material helps me memorize. 

before exams me and my classmates will find time to study together. They caught on to the fact I'd make my own study guide and wanted a copy of it. No problem cuz I want to help if I can. Now before every exam our group chat always asks for it super far in advance. I don't always have time to 100% finish it before exams especially if we have multiple in a week. Again half the reason I make it is cuz making it helps me study. Then they started getting angry if I didn't have it done in a certain period of time. I usually had it fully done 5-7 days before an exam, and they'd get mad saying that wasn't enough time. 
 

they are all my close friends. I love each of them and love to help them. But I don't like feeling responsible for their studying. I feel like I've been very generous. I've tried to explain that the study guide was part of how I studied and not meant to be ready at a certain time. They just think I'm gate keeping it. Any advice on how to set good boundaries? I want them to succeed but also don't want to feel responsible for them

[chare]

You started helping them by sharing your study guide.  Now, when they don't get it in what they consider a timely fashion, you're the bad guy.  While you consider them "close friends," I'm not sure they view you the same. 

Based on what you've posted, it seems to me they are taking advantage of your generosity.  You overcame failing your first semester, subsequently developed good study habits, and are now doing well.  And they can do the same.

In my opinion.  While I understand your wanting them to succeed, it isn't your responsibility, and their expecting you to share your study guide is a stretch, and in my opinion borders on using you, and your generosity.  Do not get caught up in this drama, and definitely do not let this affect your success.  And, unless you get something other than aggrevation from partipating in these study sessions, stop

If it were me I would show them what worked for me and share my study habits and techniques; but not my study guide.

Best wishes.

[FullGlass, BSN, MSN, NP]

An important part of being a nurse, and something many nurses struggle with, is setting boundaries.  Most prospective nurses and practicing nurses want to help people.  Unfortunately, this can result in difficulty setting and keeping boundaries.

It is NOT your responsibility to create study guides for your classmates.  It doesn't matter if they are your friends.  In fact, it is hurting them as it is robbing them of the opportunity to maximize their own learning.  As you stated, making the study guide is an important part of how you learn and why you do well on the exams.  Just tell them you are no longer going to provide your personal study guide.  It doesn't matter if they get mad.  Yes, you read that right - you are in nursing school to become a nurse, period.  You likely will never hear from these folks again after you graduate.  

However, in the interest of diplomacy, you could say something like:  "My schedule has changed and I am no longer able to produce study guides for the group.  I suggest the rest of you make your own guides, as this will aid in your learning and then you can have them ready on your schedule.   Or you can take turns making the guides up for each other."   

Frankly, these folks don't sound like good "friends."  Go find some better study mates.

If you were really mean, you could even create crappy study guides for them and that would teach them a painful lesson.  With everyone touting AI, tell them to use Chat GPT to create their study guide!

Good luck in school.

[C.Love, MSN, NP]

I would ask them to participate, take turns doing the study guide or divide up the portions and each contribute, otherwise, forget sharing with them. It sounds like they are taking you for granted and using you. I keep hearing so much nonsense in nursing that is bad for our profession. 

[Gratefulbutnotstupid, ASN, LPN, RN]

I have to agree with C. Love, MSN, NP.  Ask everyone to contribute.  If they are not willing to do that, then they are not willing to learn and are just using you for your well put together study guides.  Tell them you can not find the time to finish the study guides for them and also study yourself for the needed time to pass.