My brother in law is diabetic and won't take care of himself. Last year he quit his insulin and medical care. He came to visit last fall with his foot horribly infected. He had a 12 day stay in the hospital, two surgeries and lost half his foot. He has stairs, lives alone and doesn't drive, so he stayed with us for five weeks recovering.
He still won't take care of himself. He had yet another crisis last week, and I drove four hours to his home and took him to ER because he wouldn't go to the clinic. (He was planning to come to our house, and I didn't want a repeat of last fall, so I went to his house.)
He's very lonely, and I'm starting to think he is neglecting himself so family will give him attention. He has emotional and probably mental issues. We've tried hard to get him to get SSI, etc., but he won't for a variety of reasons. He's very frustrating.
My husband and I are quite upset with him right now. If he chooses not to care for his diabetes, that's his choice and I can accept that. But I'm upset that he keeps wanting me to "fix" him, and it is imposing on my life. Occasionally is fine - he's family - but it's getting to be a habit.
I'm not sure what to do the next time he has a crisis. Let him lose a leg? If he loses a leg, I don't want him to come live here. I'm having trouble knowing how to set limits. Any ideas?
