I feel your pain, I have either developed an ulcer (most likely) or contracted botulism (had corn beef hash the day that is was stated it was recalled). Anyway - I started with really REALLY bad symptoms, slept for almost 36 hours, wasn't able to think, scared out of my mind (blood sugar probably almost nothing - didn't eat). Now I have traditional ulcer symptoms, on top of what appears to be IBS.
I attribute this to constant 7am - 10pm days 5-6 days a week. It's getting old and I've only been doing it for a month. I'm already ready to start sending our resumes for nursing home (which I swore to myself I'd NEVER do) but I'm desperate to get some time for my family which I rarely have these days.
I love the time with the patients, that's why I thought I would love this field, but the hours are way too much and I just can't continue. I feel like a failure. Only been a nurse for 2.5 years and been through 6 jobs, not finding one I like (well I like home care, just the hours is killing me physically).
Next month (supposedly) I should start my NP program, so I am praying that that is somewhere I'll be happy. I can't continue feeling like a failure, I have even thought of the worst possible thing. I've never been suicidal, but I tell you, after 2.5 years of being miserable, I have considered myself a failure and have considered it for the first time in my life.
I am just so disappointed with my life.
Sorry to ramble, none of this is your problem. I just think Im on the verge of a breakdown and I have to find some stability. Unfortunately I don't believe I will find it in this agency. *sigh* back to finding another job, yet again.