Help! Just barely hanging on!

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I am a single mom, of two great kids 6 & 8, in my 1st semester of the ADN program. I am looking for part time employment, but I haven't found anything that works around my schedule and my children. I have been divorced for 4 years, but I do live with my boyfriend of 3 years.

I have always been an A or AB student and able to handle whatever came my way, but now it's all I can do to keep up and I stay stressed to the max! I love nursing and this is what I've always wanted to do and I understand the material. But on my Fundamentals tests, I seem to stay somewhere between a 76 and an 88, which I have to have an 80 to pass. My boyfriend has always been supportive but since his work has diminished and I've started the program, he doesn't understand my lack of time for him or housework and stays aggravated with me. I don't have time to spend quality time with my kids other than "mom duties" like baths, homework, etc. I get up in the AM, take the kids to school, I go to school, get out of school, p/u kids from daycare, do the daily duties (kids homework, baths supper, etc) and by the time I get that done its 10pm and then it's time for my boyfriend to vent about his day or problems (if it hasn't already started-not to mention drilling me b/c I don't have time or energy to spend w/ him or his "needs") and its 11 or later b/f I can start studying & by then I'm exhausted and absorb nothing & usually fall asleep in my books about 1 or 2 AM. Then on my clinical day, I'm always running late getting my assessment & documentation done, because I was told that I'm too nice and my patients take advantage. Really, I'm just trying to take care of their needs, because I know what it's like to be a patient and I don't want to be rude, but I got fussed at this past week for "time management" b/c my patient was going to surgery and I kept getting interrupted everytime I started my assessment. My midterm clinical review was great and the only bad thing was "time management". I'm beginning to just stay upset and discouraged, just barely keeping up and getting nothing accomplished or done good enough. I'm struggling in school, my boyfriend asks if I'm the only one that neglects their family and responsibilities and has no life, and I just don't know what to do anymore. I want this so bad, but I feel like I am just banging my head against the wall most days. Help!!!:crying2:

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I can understand being slow on documentation, but what keeps you from doing a "good" five minute assessment?

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I always tried to grab the vitals as soon as I went in for the first contact with the patient in the morning. I would get that info and do a quick assessment then ask if they needed anything as I left. I would let them know I would be back shortly with meds or to help them with am care and I would try to document whatever I could if I had time. If they had a hard time letting me out the door, I would let them know I had to get the "vitals machine" back out in the hallway for my classmates or they would be after me. :-) That way, I always had my BP, pulse, resp, etc for med pass, too.

As for the rest of it, I understand. I have two kids and my husband is military and deployed my whole last year of school. I can't tell you how many times I cried and how much I stressed. I felt like I was "neglecting" the kids and felt a lot of guilt. I just explained to them what I was doing, that it wouldn't always be like this, etc. Well, now, they are so proud to tell their friends that their mom is a nurse. :-) I think them seeing what you are doing for you and for them will be good for them in the long run and may motivate them in their education. DO NOT GIVE UP! It is definitely worth it!

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My question is, does your boyfriend help around the house at all? He needs to pick up some chores. Put him to work! As for the kids...can't they take their own showers/baths? I put my 3 year old son in the bath and he can wash himself, his hair, get out and towel off by himself. He can also pick out his jammies for the night, get dressed in them, comb his hair and then it's ready for bed at 8pm. He cleans up his own toys (sometimes he needs a little prodding) and he even helps me with the laundry. And he JUST turned 3 earlier this month. All I'm saying is that maybe everyone can pitch in and help around the house. Your boyfriend can have the duty of helping the kids with the homework as you prepare dinner. The kids can come home and vacuum the house when they get home from school. It really helps in our family! Maybe you can have time on Saturday to go to the library or someplace on your own to study while he watches the kids. Maybe you can pick out a special day (like Friday evenings) to spend just 2 hours with the kids so they don't feel neglected. Just some thoughts. I hope that it gets better for you! Good luck!

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I was wondering the same thing myslef CalebMommy. Can't your boyfriend help out with homework? Or pick up the kids since you drop them off? If he hekped more with the kids (and him) maybe you would have more time to study and be with him. Maybe you can explan the "bigger picture" to him - this is not forever and it will benefit you both in the long run.

Good luck.

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forget it, guys don't get it............... you need to learn to PRIORITZE what needs to be done first, for example say u have a test coming up and a careplan due which will take longer...........? which is first? if plan due fri and test wed than work on plan a bit at a time, alternate with studying until wed, than concentrate on plan........... also really housework will go out the window. trust me by the end of school u will b happy just to have clean undies, never mind a clean house. it is very stressful and aggravating but so worth it.... same with clinical PRIORITIZE! btw, if the boyfriend is not part of the cure that he is part of the problem ;)

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