Having trouble with one particular CNA

[Katiebug96]

I work as a CNA every other weekend. I do my job, and do everything I'm suppose to. But, there is this 2nd shift CNA, who absolutely despises me for some reason. She picks out everything I do wrong, or something that could've been done, etc and she doesn't even work on my hall. I wrote a post about another situation with her a couple weeks ago. I worked this weekend, and today we had an agent come in to take over my spot. She was there the previous day, taking care of my same patients. When it was time for me to give her my report, I asked if she was okay with everything and if I needed to tell her more about the patients (since she worked yesterday) but she proceeded to say she was fine and I told her what they were doing at that time, etc. I walked by the CNA that always gives me a hard time, and she commented to me that if I already gave her my report. I continue to say yes, and she just kept being smart, and saying how she doesn't know anything etc. And how I needed to say this and that. But, I made sure the CNA from the agency was fine. What does everyone think about this situation? I know we all deal with difficult coworkers, but this one in particular picks only on me.

[JBMmom, MSN, NP]

I would probably confront her directly, or it might be more effective to request a meeting with her and either your charge nurse, supervisor or administrator. I've found that sometimes when people are called out directly, a positive outcome can be reached. If nothing else, it will bring to the attention of other coworkers that you're making a proactive move to improve a work relationship. Good luck.

[Katiebug96]

Yeah, I was thinking about doing that! Thanks!

[mmc51264, BSN, MSN, RN]

i had an issue with another nurse, and it got a little ugly. I had a meeting with the other nurse and my manager so that we could be professional. To my shock-the other nurse went OFF on my in front of our manager. Got her finger in my face and all that. For nothing. My manager's mouth just dropped! I don't think the issue would have been resolved if we hadn't met with a third party.

Try to be the bigger person and bring your concerns to your supervisor in a professional manner. Hopefully something can be worked out.

[Apple-Core, ASN, BSN, RN]

I absolutely would confront this issue head-on and directly. I would suggest arranging a meeting with a third person (manager) in a private office. Stay calm, be polite but direct: "I have called this meeting because there appears to be some friction between us. I am not sure where it has come from, so I would like to give you the opportunity to let me know what it is so that we can work together to resolve it and move forward."

She will either deny it - in which case you have confronted it directly and if she's rude to you again you can say, "I'm sorry - I thought that there wasn't a problem?" *or* she will tell you what the issue is and hopefully you can deal with it and reach a mutually agreeable outcome.

[Davey Do]

I wrote a post about another situation with her a couple weeks ago.

And I will give you the same reply:

Negative critiques of our performance is a difficult thing to take, isn't it Katiebug, especially when we attempt to do, in the very least, an adequate job?

The only concept that helps me deal with these kind of negative reactions is to remember that all behaviors stem from the two basic emotions of love or fear.

People react the way they do because they want to positively express their emotions by showing love for someone or they behave negatively out of fear. A lot of People have low self esteems and increase their self esteem by putting others down. "At least I'm not as bad as him or her" they seem to say, "So that means I'm a good Person!"

These People are expressing the need for love of self and also the fear that they are not in control of others or falls short of their standards/expectations.

We will deal with this negative reactions constantly throughout our lives, Katiebug, and we cannot allow others' perception of who we are be more important then our own self perception. We have to sleep ourselves, so it's best that we like ourselves as much as possible. And the way to like ourselves is through practice. And, as we all know, practice provides opportunity for possible improvement.

So, Katiebug, take this thread you've started as the first step in practicing to make your opinion of yourself, in the very least, as important as what others think of you. But not more important than your own.