Why do people try to discourage you? :(

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I'm almost in tears right now and don't know what to do. I have been a stay-at-home mom for 5 years now with a 4-year-old and 1-year-old. I have always wanted to work in obstetrics; however, I wanted a family first. Now that my baby is getting older I am interested in taking the pre-reqs for either an ADN program or an LPN and then bridge to ADN...depending on issues with my closest school.

I was talking to a "friend" who is always pretty negative about stuff. I was telling her about my plan to enroll for the pre-reqs soon and she was like...

"You do know that it's very competitive to get in, right?"

"High school is different than college. College is a lot different and a lot harder."

"Those people competing aren't going to be high school students. They're going to be wives and mothers and people who work that are going to be competing for your spot."

"I'm just trying to inform you since I've been there."

"I'm just telling you because I live in reality and you are dreamy."

"It doesn't matter that you had a 3.8 in high school...if there are 250 people with 4.0's trying to get into the same program and end up with 4.0's on the pre-reqs."

I told her exactly how I felt about all that she said. I felt like she was saying, "You're too stupid. Don't apply." I feel like people, usually my husband, always try to make me feel stupid or uneducated. I was in the top 5% in high school! I feel like I am a smart girl and I feel like I can do it. Does it make me nervous that there is such competition? Sure. Does it make me want to do something else? No. Do I think I'll be accepted the first try? I hope so! I told her how I felt and she just said she was trying to help and that I was being sensitive. If she was just trying to help, she could have said something like, "Well, just make sure you do as well as you can on your pre-reqs since it's competitive." But no, everything I said she kept saying something against it.

I have to admit that I am a little discouraged now and am doubting my abilities now. But, and no offense to anyone...she has an AD in Business Administration. I'm sorry, but that is NOT the same thing as nursing!! My husband occasionally makes me feel stupid because I stay at home and have no degree. But I am a smart girl! I'm not stupid! I just want to shout that to the world. Just because I did things in a different order doesn't mean I'm stupid and incapable of getting a 4.0 on my pre-reqs and getting into a nursing program! God...why do people have to try to beat you down??? :crying2::crying2:

Specializes in Trauma, MICU.

First off...you're not dumb. And like you...I did things backwards, but I think it works better that way sometimes. I'm 34, have an 18yr, 3yr & 1yr. I did TERRIBLE in high school, pretty bad in college when I was 18 and decided to go back to college when I was 29 to get my RN degree. A) It's hard...as it should be!, B) I think the older students did better than the younger ones in my school b/c they had more to lose if they failed a test/semester, C) It's worth it if you really want to be a nurse!!! Hang in there...you're gonna get more negative comments all along the way...be it spouse, friends, family, teachers, students, medical personnel, etc. Just stay the course that you decide to run! Good Luck!!! :)

My siblings do the same thing - I'll be 19 in August and am just starting my nursing pre-reqs. I get made fun of, people question my motivation, and get told over and over and over and over again that I should be "doing something else" because "Nursing isn't for me."

One thing you have to realize and keep close to your heart is what matters is what you think of yourself. Yes, nursing school is competitive. But at least you're among the faction that wants to work hard for it and can believe in yourself then the faction that thinks it's easy as cake.

If nursing is what you really want to do (and it really sounds like it is) then hold your chin high and go for it - all it matters is what you think of yourself. If you're proud and want to work your ass off to get in...then go for it! In the end, it's your accomplishment, not hers. Also, it's nice to prove other people wrong. :rolleyes:

Remember why you want to do this and go for it. :heartbeat It'll be a hard journey, but a lot of people say it's worth it in the end.

You are so RIGHT!!! Don't let ANYONE steal your joy. If you believe that you can do it and this is what you truly want to do, then go for it. It is you who will be studying and taking the test, not your husband or your friend (if that is what you can call her) Let me tell you something I am a 36yr old mom of 5 with a special needs child and I currently have a 3.87 GPA. There are people around me that can't believe it, but with a little determination and faith you CAN do it. Don't waste anymore time trying to tell them what you are going to do...like NIKE says just do it and it will shut them up.

Be encouraged :nurse:

I appreciate the encouragement from everyone...I really do. I know this is what I want to do. I am not going to let anyone stop me from doing it! When I do become an RN, I'll make sure she knows it.

The only thing I'm struggling with is when to start my pre-reqs. I wanted to start soon to get started as fast as possible, but I am having trouble with the idea of putting my son in daycare. I really don't want to do that...wouldn't mind if he were at least 2 or 3. But I think there are options for all day Saturday classes at my college for the pre-reqs, so I will have to see about that so I can go ahead and get to working on it!

Specializes in Case Mgmt, Anesthesia, ICU, ER, Dialysis.

Some of your initial online stuff may even be able to be done online. My best friend is doing her initial stuff that way, and she's thrilled.

You are not dumb. You had the sense to seek out help and advice here. That's the mark of a wise nurse.

Lots of wisdom on here...come find us any time, for encouragement, academic help, or whatever.

Don't listen to anyone who thinks you can't do it. Surround yourself with those who can.

Do not be surprised if the harder you persevere the louder the dissenting voices become. Tune them out. All that matters is that voice in your heart.

Specializes in l.p.n.

I think the best thing to stop thinking and just do it. I had the same feeling about the day care but believe me she will love it . start with short classes like to go more days and less hours rather than less day for more hours. I started with m,w,f 8-9 am this way I will take 2classes in 2hours. some colleges offer early classes like mine 7am. YOu will take 7-8& 8-9AM before it will be 9:30am you are home with your children . work it with your husband so you will not need any daycare. Try small so they will not feel the diffrent then go for the longer classeslikeA&p. good luck

Specializes in Med/Surg/Pedi/Tele.

you need new friends!

You are going to come across a lot of people that are going to have the same attitude as your "friend", especially once you get in your prereqs - It seems like many have that ****** attitude that assumes that they are better than you and you will never make it. And you're right, it can be discouraging, but at the same time it is motivating - to prove them wrong! In your prereqs will be a lot of people all going for nursing, but you have to remember that you want this MORE than they do, and you are going to work harder and do whatever it takes! You're always going to hear about the people that have been tryign to get into NS for 5 years or whatever, or schools that only take 4.0s (which is totally not true, high GPAs, yes, but they usually want a well-rounded student) - But whatever you do, just keep your faith, and tell yourself that you are going to make it, and you will! Good luck to you, and "Keep your head up, because they'd kill to see you fall"

sounds like you need a new man and some new friends! people who should love you should encourage you! you'll find out how "competitive" it is when you go speak with an advisor. that is for *you* to worry about. p.s. an associate's degree in business administration amounts to hmmm...nothing. that degree and $1.25 will get ya a bus ticket! and your husband thinks you're dumb, b/c you stay at home all day? he's the one who leaves to go off to work and then gives money to you. you've got a good set up! ;)

sorry to sound harsh, but dude, go for it!

promise to come back here and tell us how you rubbed it in both their faces when you get your first "a"!!!

If this is what you want to do - then you should do it! I'm almost 32 and I am just about to start my second semester of nursing school. I was fortunate enough to have a very supportive husband, but I heard all kinds of things from other people. I try to just ignore them....if they aren't motivated enough to work to achieve their goals, that is THEIR problem and they can keep it to themselves. I AM motivated and I DO work my butt off to get the things that I want.

All the nay-sayers should listen to the wise words of my grandmother, "If you can't think of anything nice to say, don't say anything at all!!" :D

Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.

Most people who try to bring you down on a regular basis are doing it for one reason:

They have insecurities about themselves and need to tear you down so that they can feel superior. They feel emotionally threatened by the thought that you might become more successful (more respected, more satisfied, richer, etc.) than they are themselves. Someone who is truly confident in their own abilities and happy with their own decisions doesn't mind if the people around them are successful. In fact, if they truly care about you, they will want you to be successful and will help you achieve your goals.

The thought of you being a successful professional must really hit a sensitive nerve in your friend and husband. Just curious ... if you become an RN, will you be earning as much money as your husband? have greater career opportunities or job security? oes he have a college degree. Those types of things may be part of the reason he feels a little insecure about you going to school.

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