Should boyfriend help me out?

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I am attending a community college for an accelerated nursing program. I currently work at a small local restaurant and get paid only minimum wage. My school schedule only allows me to work 3 days a week including weekends; therefore, I am making no money. I'm not qualified for student aid and the school I attend does not participate in any student loan programs. I've tried applying at other restaurants such as Chili's and Olive Garden but I don't get hired because they do training in mornings which I cannot attend because of school hours. My parents are putting gas in my car, but they can only help out so much. I still have a car note to pay and credit card bill. My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 3 years. I have several girls in my class and their boyfriend is helping them out. Many girls were even able to quit their jobs because their boyfriend will give them money. I hate to work more hours and start failing school because of it. Do you think my boyfriend should be helping me out? Should he offer to put gas in my car, give me $50 or so? I don't think it is his obligation to help me out, but I feel he should.

Though I don't think he should be obligated to do so, if he could help you out from time to time it would be nice if he has the means to do so if you guys are that serious. Generosity is a good trait.

I have a similar situation, though I am a bit older with more responsibilities. My boyfriend has plenty of money, and I cannot really work much because of kids (not his) and school. We have been together for 3+ years and he hopes to marry me. There are times when I really struggle financially - I'll say something like "I have no gas in my car, or no money to buy groceries etc" his response is always the same "that sucks". It is not his responsibility to take care of me financially, so I make it work on my own. BUT here is where the problem lies, I know that if the roles were reversed I would gladly help him out especially if I understood he could not work because he was investing in OUR future by getting an education. It makes me wonder what he will be like if we ever do get married.

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Specializes in Psych.

Soooo.....you feel your boyfriend 'should'....be your SUGAR DADDY????????

That's not a relationship...that's a 'situation'.

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Thanks.

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lizmatt we definitely think alike.

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"It makes me wonder what he will be like if we ever do get married."

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"Is he financially in a place where he can help support you and himself?"

He is 21 years old in September. Trust me, he can help me out. He makes around $5,000 a month and his bills add up to around $600. He doesn't spend the rest of it.

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One can't help but wonder how a 21 yr old is making $5000/mo. And only $600 in expenses? Does that mean he's living with family and not paying rent?

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Specializes in Operating Room.

He's not required to help, but if y'all have been together for 3 years and he's not offering to help, you may want to look at what you want your life to be like in the future!!!

That's just my personal opinion....

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Specializes in ICU, PICC Nurse, Nursing Supervisor.

i do not think he is obligated, but a nice guy that had it would offer it to his girl. now once you are married that is a different story..gimmie your wallet...i'm not asking anymore , i'm broke. but i feel for you i hope you get around your situation...

"is he financially in a place where he can help support you and himself?"

he is 21 years old in september. trust me, he can help me out. he makes around $5,000 a month and his bills add up to around $600. he doesn't spend the rest of it.

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Specializes in FNP, Peds, Epilepsy, Mgt., Occ. Ed.

Have you talked to him about it? He may have a budget and financial goals of his own.

He may not have eventual marriage in mind at all.

Those would both be very good things to know.

If you still owe a lot on your car, consider selling it, paying it off, and buying some very cheap transportation until you get out of school. Keep looking for better/additional jobs, too.

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Honestly, NO he doesn't have any obligation to help you out. He's your boyfriend.

Yes it is sweet that other girls boyfriend's help them out here or there...but they don't HAVE to.

I'm sorry if you are having a hard time and I hope things get better for you. I have no objections if he wants to help you out. But you said you thought he SHOULD. It's all up to him...it's not part of his "boyfriend duties".

GL

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"One can't help but wonder how a 21 yr old is making $5000/mo. And only $600 in expenses? Does that mean he's living with family and not paying rent?"

Yes, he is living with his parents, as I am living with mine. We are waiting to get married until I finish school.

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