Venting

[pink_princess11]

I'm not sure if this is the right thing to do but, I don't know what else to do anymore. I became a nurse almost a year ago and had the highest hopes for all the good I was going to do for my patients. In reality, it's a day full of being yelled at by both patients and other staff, getting phone calls on your day off because you misread an order and because a doctor didn't talk to you about said (apparently that's my fault too), having aching feet and legs literally all the time, and constant exhaustion. And it only gets worse when you try to defend yourself and why you did what you did. I did not sign up to be everyone's punching bag or to be spat on by patients. I didn't sign up to be blamed for not being a perfect nurse by misreading an order. I didn't sign up to be blamed for not having labs flagged when they weren't in the first place. I didn't sign up to wonder why I even started nursing in the first place. That's truly where I'm at, wondering why I even put myself through this day in and day out. I wanted to do good for my patients and now I just feel like a legal drug dealer and to be abused by almost everyone I take care of. I knew that it would be different than clinical but, I didn't expect this. I didn't expect the bullying or the supervisors that expect you to be perfect. I'm just wondering if every nurse goes through this or if this is what nursing is really like or if it's just me...

[Horseshoe, BSN, RN]

I'm not sure if this is the right thing to do but, I don't know what else to do anymore. I became a nurse almost a year ago and had the highest hopes for all the good I was going to do for my patients. In reality, it's a day full of being yelled at by both patients and other staff, getting phone calls on your day off because you misread an order and because a doctor didn't talk to you about said (apparently that's my fault too), having aching feet and legs literally all the time, and constant exhaustion. And it only gets worse when you try to defend yourself and why you did what you did. I did not sign up to be everyone's punching bag or to be spat on by patients. I didn't sign up to be blamed for not being a perfect nurse by misreading an order. I didn't sign up to be blamed for not having labs flagged when they weren't in the first place. I didn't sign up to wonder why I even started nursing in the first place. That's truly where I'm at, wondering why I even put myself through this day in and day out. I wanted to do good for my patients and now I just feel like a legal drug dealer and to be abused by almost everyone I take care of. I knew that it would be different than clinical but, I didn't expect this. I didn't expect the bullying or the supervisors that expect you to be perfect. I'm just wondering if every nurse goes through this or if this is what nursing is really like or if it's just me...

I get that this is a vent, but if you misread an order, you should in fact "be blamed." Hopefully in a way that helps you figure out where you went wrong and how to prevent it in the future, but yeah, you made a med error and need to be called on it. We've all done it and it stings for a second, but at the end of the day, there is no acceptable number of medication errors. You should be "misreading" zero orders, every single day. Don't get me wrong, I've absolutely done it-but I don't throw my anger towards the person who dares to point it out. It's myself I was upset with.

What you are describing as "nursing" absolutely does not have to be the case. I'm never abused, yelled at by patients, or anyone else for that matter. I've never been bullied and I don't view being expected to give every medication correctly every day as being expected to be "perfect." The field of nursing has many many different avenues. Get your experience, work to improve your practice so that you are seen as an attractive candidate in a field that appeals to you more, and make a change for the better. There are all kinds of ways to make a difference that don't involve being abused.

PS-why did you post this in the HIPAA forum? You'd get a lot more support and responses if you'd posted it in the general nursing forum.

[pink_princess11]

I saw nursing challeneges and thought that it was for people with struggles in nursing.

[Horseshoe, BSN, RN]

I saw nursing challeneges and thought that it was for people with struggles in nursing.

It's actually Nursing Challenges relating to HIPAA. If you notified one of the mods, I bet they'd move it for you.

[nursel56]

Generally speaking, when you first start out in any career, it's normal to feel stress, discomfort and to be challenged. The first year of nursing is pretty intense, no doubt about it. When you think of the responsibilities you'll be expected to handle, this period of time is normal and necessary.

You have to hang in there for long enough to truly see glimpses of what the job might ultimately be, and also some of the rewards you envisioned when you were in a more idealistic state of mind.

I do understand that there are vast differences in how one employer orients their new grads and others. Some places really are toxic and ultimately impossible to grow into feeling like you are contributing something positive to your patient's care.

I couldn't say based on your post if you work for such a place, just that "growing pains" are normal when you are in your first few years, and that this job is not representative of all nursing jobs.

Not sure if you've looked over the "First Year After Licensure" topics located under the Nursing Career Advice heading, but I would really recommend doing that, as you may see your situation in some of your fellow new nurses, which could lead you to some solutions you might use in your own career.

Just know your feelings right now will change with time. Hoping you find a more supportive and fulfilling job.