Parenting, Nursing and Emergency Situations?

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I'm not sure I titled that right, but here's my question:

Does anyone have/had children with both parents in emergency services? How do you handle it? Do you have other people who watch your children during a conflicting situation?

My husband is a software developer and is part of the emergency operations center (EOC) for the county whenever there is any type of critical/high crime situation. (like hurricanes or bike week or any other situation where there are a lot more people than usual in the area...we held a debate earlier this year and Obama and Clinton were here and they were activated as well)

I am a nursing student, and currently my job seems to always play second fiddle because I make about minimum wage, and thats somewhat understandable (although not so much to my boss of course :(). I had not really thought about it before persuing a career in nursing, but I have no idea what I'm going to do, or how we are going to decide who goes and who does not. It cannot always be me that backs down, because as it is, I'm trying the patience of my boss. We have daycare but its only days during the week and have no family or friends here due to being transplants from another state.

Any thoughts? Similar situations that you were able to resolve?

We have a similar circumstance- my husband is an active duty Air Force nurse and I am a nursing student. My best advice is to try to make friends with your neighbors. If any of them have children as well maybe you can swap childcare in the evenings when you need it. If there are no neighbors- how about fellow classmates?

Good luck in school!

Its not the day to day stuff that bothers me so much I guess, but the emergency situations. Having grown up in Florida the idea of being away from my loved ones and having them not be w/ either of us really puts me on edge (was hit w/ 3 hurricanes including being flooded one summer before we moved).

I guess its a two fold problem that I'm having. I don't want to always have to be the one to call in to work due to a hurricane/family emergency but I also don't want a stranger to be responsible for my children in that situation. If its just some rain sure, but if people are panicking/power is going out/high wind/etc there's just nobody that I trust in this area enough to expect them to put my kids before themselves if the need arises.

You wouldn't think it would be a bit deal, but as I said, we were hit w/ 3 big hurricanes in one summer, and right now, as I sit home from work due to a hurricane hitting tonight (its not bad but schools and daycare centers are all closed), I am also having to figure out what to do for NEXT weekend, as a SECOND hurricane is planning to visit us.

Specializes in ED, ICU, Heme/Onc.

DH is a police officer and since he has a crazy amount of vaca time & sick time, he's usually the one to call out when we have a sick kid or if a sitter flakes on us. I work 12h days, he does 8hr. 2nd shifts. We've never had a "state of emergency when we've both had to work but our agreement is, whomever is home, stays home (and doesn't answer the phone to be "called in") until arrangements are made for the kids. We have a person designated to go get them at school in case of extreme emergency and will keep them until we can get there. It's highly unlikely that this will ever happen, so I just don't worry about it.

Blee

What advice would you give to someone who asked you this question?

Life is tough.

Make a list of your alternatives and go with the best one(s). One thing is to take the kids to work/school with you. Tell your boss, only if and when it becomes essential to tell him, that you have to bring the kids with you. Give no reason other than your usual sitters are not available and that you will be glad to work or come to class but you wouldn't be worth a darn if you didn't know your kids were safe, so you'll be bringing them along.

In the long run, it sounds like building a good social network is a priority so that there are people who you trust who can help out if need be. Easier said than done, I'm sure, but you gotta start somewhere. Maybe joining a church, if that's your thing, or some other local groups where you can meet people and start to develop the kind of relationships that you can count on. Once you develop some close relationships, you could suggest making explicit emergency arrangements to take care of each others kids if need be (have each other's emergency numbers, kids' medical info, etc). In addition to building relationships with other families with kids, there might also be some local older folks without family who would enjoy the opportunity to be surrogate grandparents and have the availability to step in and help out since they don't have their own family to take care of. Of course, this is not a quick solution, but it could be a good long-term goal for your family. It's great that you're thinking ahead about this; with that kind of foresight, I'm sure you'll come up with a workable solution!!

Specializes in OB.

Once you are a working nurse, find other nurses on your unit with similar situations, for instance single parent nurses and talk to them ahead of time about emergency (disaster) coverage. It will help if 2 of you can go to your manager and present a plan where one of you will be on each disaster team (response/relief or whatever they call it there) so that the other can be watching the children of both, then trade off. Sick children, etc. are a little different - you and your husband need to work that out or see if you can find a sitter who takes kids with minor illnesses (I've seen a couple of hospitals that actually had this as part of their daycare system - wonderful idea!)

Specializes in ICU.

we too were an island when it came to childcare and disaster. my husband and i took turns......he called in, the next time it was my turn. hospitals don't want to hear you have responsibilities to your children. just do what you have to. they will do what they have to. :smokin:

Specializes in Psych/Substance Abuse & School Clinics.

How far are you from nearest family? If it was an impending emergency, is family able to come get kids to stay w/them or are you able to bring them to family? What state did you move to? I'm in Fla. & it sounded like you moved from here to get away from the hurricanes, so what emergencies are you thinking of?

How far are you from nearest family? If it was an impending emergency, is family able to come get kids to stay w/them or are you able to bring them to family? What state did you move to? I'm in Fla. & it sounded like you moved from here to get away from the hurricanes, so what emergencies are you thinking of?

I'm outside of Myrtle Beach, SC and my nearest and really only family is in Weeki Wachee, Fla (thats just north of Tampa/St Pete) But then, my mom is in the National Guard, and she gets mobilized to help whenever there is a hurricane too, so that doesn't help me much.

Thanks for all the tips. This has never been an issue, but I've never had a job where someone's life could be impacted by my calling in sick (always did desk jobs...software support, training, etc)

In the end, my family has to come first and I'd take the time I needed and let the chips fall where they may. I just hate that this is such an issue. I could not even give my boss a heads up the other day before chosing to stay home because if I were allowed, then everyone else could too, and they'd have nobody to take care of their patients. It would be great if there was some sort of employee benefit that dealt with this sort of thing. My husband's job has a shelter specifically for their families so they can work without worrying about them, but no childcare or anything involved, so that would be great if I was still a stay at home mom, but now, not so much.

I'm starting to think that I may need to find a job that is more doctor's office/outpatient surgery or the like in order to meet my family's requirements. I have time though. :)

Was just curious what working healthcare workers did in this situation.

+ Add a Comment