Old nurse won't retire

[Emergent]

I have a work friend, we'll call her Barbara, at my side job. She's over 70 and works part time in the ER of a tiny hospital. Since I've worked there she's given several deadlines of when she's going to retire, the latest of which was this October. She made a beaded necklace with the amount of beads of days left, taking one bead off at a time, sharing with everyone, even the DNS, who took her off on the Oct schedule.

I talked to her yesterday and she let me know that she's changed her mind again. She says that with the cold days approaching, this isn't the right season to retire, she'll just be sitting in her house. She said that she only has to give 3 weeks notice, and hasn't done that yet, and was upset that she was off the October schedule.

Barbara is a very likable woman, but frankly, she needs to retire. She is not very fit, and limps with a bad leg. She calls in frequently, which has a bigger impact on a small hospital. She never had kids and her husband died years ago. She doesn't seem to have hobbies.

I'm afraid that management will start writing her up for her attendance to get rid of her. Even though I love her, she doesn't pull her weight anymore. I don't want to sign up for shifts with her and have to do 3/4 of the work. It'd be a shame to see her be forced out.

One time she told me to let her know when she is starting to slip. Well, that's been going on for a while, but people are being patient since she's been sharing with all about her impending retirement. She needs to retire with dignity as planned .

[cubby777]

How is this woman any different about pulling her load than the young nurses who are looking at FB while at work,talking with an ear piece,chatting up the residents,or outrageously throwing themselves at the attending males, the respiratory crew or anything with a dick and balls.How many call bells go unanswered because Miss Chatty Cathy is too busy socializing,showing her latest vacation trip photos or describing how she cooked for 20+ for dinner and now feels so tired.Then Miss big mouth has to regale everyone with what she did in bed with her boyfriend/husband the week before and if there is any time left she will spend it looking over the schedule trying to get three weeks off when everyone else is limited to two.

It is a difficult sensitive situation and should be handled with the same respect we show for any patient off the street.How callous some of the comments here,shame on you.That nurse could be your own mother.

Well said! So many younger nurses have their faces glued onto their cell phones...it's amazing that managements allow nurses to listen and watch videos, movies, etc. on their phones when they could be doing something for their patients. Plus, it's a shame if hospitals are trying to run off more experienced, older nurses since they have to be paid more by flooding the units with younger nurses.

[cubby777]

Gee. And here I thought it was only my hospital that this went on in! Lol. :)

Mine too!

[cubby777]

Every time I read or hear someone ask, "Am I too old to become a nurse?" I tell them that ageism is alive and well. Most of the old nurses I've worked with carried a wealth of knowledge and experience. Maybe it just looks like they are slower than younger ones, simply because they spend more time with their patients, rather than rushing off to get back to facebook or something. I notice the younger ones that I personally work with do not respect older people, do not respect authority, do as little as possible, yet complain about the older workers as if THEY are the problem. OP, are you sure this woman is really that much slower than you, or do you think you might be a little biased or simply discriminate because of age?

Good comments! I so agree that many younger ones lack respect for older people or for authority...it's like the culture has decided to give way to their self absorption. It all gets back to management and the kind of culture that they instill or demand...but like so many who have positions of authority, they let the inmates run the asylum. It's ultimately up to management to demand that nurses do their jobs and put the cell phones down.

[cubby777]

A big amen to this!

Really well said!

[cubby777]

Maybe this is where part of the disconnect is happening, why we're not getting each other. Because my job in no way defines me. It is not "who I am." It is what I do while I'm on the clock. I'm good at my job and take pride in being so. I like taking care of people when I actually get the chance to do that. Supervisors and patients alike give me positive feedback.

But who I am is who I am at home with my loved ones, with friends. I work in order to support my family and have been lucky enough to find something that I'm good at and pays decently.

If your job defines your identity, I personally think that's a problem.

Herein lies the problem with today's nurses. In the past, nurses considered nursing a calling...it was something that you did because it was in your heart to do it. Nursing is unlike most other jobs...the Great Physician, Jesus, instructed His followers "to do unto others as you would have them do unto you". If nurses saw their interactions with one another and their patients in that way, their care would be transformed.

[cubby777]

Well put Aunt Slappy. Being a nurse is what I do not who I am and I'm grateful as heck for that. Those nurses that let this profession define them often seem miserable to me. My "life" is not my work. Work allows me to fund my life and that's all. This attitude doesn't mean I'm not serious about my job. I've had a very successful career in the ER for a long time and am excited to start a new chapter as an NP.

ERs are not the place for "slow". Much of what we do is time sensitive and patient outcomes are dependent on doing the job quickly and correctly. The ER is not an adult daycare center for elder nurses who have nothing to do with their life because they let nursing define them as a person. If this nurse can't keep pace she is doing a dis-service to her colleagues and (more importantly) her patients. She should be given the opportunity to retire with dignity but if she refuses she should be terminated.

a cold heart...I would not want you for my nurse. Nursing is just as much about the spirit as the physical...sad that your job is just a job to you.

[cubby777]

It seems like you have taken her retirement on as a personal issue. However, it is actually a management call if she is not able to pull her weight or continues to call in. It may be that you have taken on "tunnel vision" and have lost ability to see how she actually benefits the team. There may be other options for her, such as decreased hours, revised job role.... but this would not be yours, as a co-worker, to determine. In my years of nursing, I have learned to focus on cleaning up my side of the street and staying in my lane. I do agree if patient safety is a concern, this should be voiced to management.

Excellent answer! It does seem strange that Emergent is so focused on a coworker when don't think for a minute that management will let someone stay on the job who isn't up to par...it's all about profits...if they're not willing to staff the hospitals correctly, why in the world would they allow someone to be paid at top dollar (since she's been there a long time) who wasn't keeping up?

[Luckyyou, BSN, RN]

Herein lies the problem with today's nurses. In the past, nurses considered nursing a calling...it was something that you did because it was in your heart to do it. Nursing is unlike most other jobs...the Great Physician, Jesus, instructed His followers "to do unto others as you would have them do unto you". If nurses saw their interactions with one another and their patients in that way, their care would be transformed.

Oh, honestly. How's the view from that high horse?

[cubby777]

At 69yrs..., 46+ years of nursing........ I have failed retirement 4 times...... boredom's and I still have "game"

Thankyou Jesus I have found a local home health company+ that recruited me.."

It is fun and laid back ...... most staff crusty ole bats....

Love, love my DON.... she is the bomb-- this may be the perfect end of career job...

No drauma......& they recruited me..".

Until I am no longer cognitive, or physical impartment..I choose to work

Sure I have critical care " game".....

but this is laid back and majority staff , like me crusty ole bats....

I'm not sure I'm still up for 12 hr shifts, except ER....... but today I don't have to do that...l

Thank you Njesus finding job that recruited me...... I can do this for a while...how long ? Maybe 3-5 more years

Best wishes for OP

Nursing is the perfect job for semi-retirement!

[Emergent, RN]

I'm bored with this thread but will make one more comment. First of all, I'm not ageist, I'm over 60 myself. I'm extremely fit due to the fact that I take excellent care of myself, but I really don't feel like picking up the slack for a coworker who can't keep up anymore. Barbara calls in at 4pm for a 6pm shift OFTEN. This a one nurse ER at night. I do a mid-shift house sup and ER position and this is a huge PITA to try to fill a shift at the last minute.

I'm very annoyed with this woman for ignoring my communications. I don't like when people do that, and I think it's because she knows what I'm going to say. This is someone I considered a friend, we occasionally do things outside of work.

Barbara has also admitted to me that she takes opiates every day, she has a chronic problem with one of her legs, and hobbles around. Frankly, I think it's irresponsible to risk patients just because you can't let go graciously.

Someone mentioned the president. I'm wondering, did he always lack a filter or is that a sign of cognitive decline with age? People say Reagan was showing signs of Alzheimer's in his second term. Hillary is another one who appears affected by her age. I personally would rather a younger, healthy person in the presidency.

[KarenMS]

How is this woman any different about pulling her load than the young nurses who are looking at FB while at work,talking with an ear piece,chatting up the residents,or outrageously throwing themselves at the attending males, the respiratory crew or anything with a dick and balls.How many call bells go unanswered because Miss Chatty Cathy is too busy socializing,showing her latest vacation trip photos or describing how she cooked for 20+ for dinner and now feels so tired.Then Miss big mouth has to regale everyone with what she did in bed with her boyfriend/husband the week before and if there is any time left she will spend it looking over the schedule trying to get three weeks off when everyone else is limited to two.

It is a difficult sensitive situation and should be handled with the same respect we show for any patient off the street.How callous some of the comments here,shame on you.That nurse could be your own mother.

wtf even is this response?

[KarenMS]

I also find it very sad. Older nurses are often just as physically capable of handling the workload as their younger counterparts...plus, they have a lot of experience to offer...which is something that doesn't come with a new license but only thru years of nursing. Sad that in today's world, there seems to be such a lack of compassion and warmth in peoples' hearts...including those of nurses.

Look at the President - he's 72 and going like gangbusters! He works all of the time! So do many of those in Congress and they are up in years as well! Their jobs are as demanding as that of nurses, only in different ways. So many older people keep working and no one seems to mind unless they are nurses. Why is it suddenly shocking that an older nurse is still on the job?

Actually, it's pretty admirable!

It's not about older nurses in general. It's about older nurses who can't physically perform. That's not really hard to understand. An 86 year old took care of my daughter in NICU and she was awesome. I wouldn't expect anyone to try to push her out. But if she was shaky, slow to respond, etc, then yes, she should have retired. As should any 26 year old who is slow to respond, or physically unable to keep up.