I once heard from a great RN teacher to always remember...Doctors go to school to treat illness, Nurses go to school to treat PEOPLE. It is most felt in situations like this..the bad news department!
Some Docs are great with this...same with some nurses...but depends on the individual I suppose. I have no probelms with giving information..good or bad, but I need to communicate with the physician and get the real infomation, the real facts, then I will arrange for a meeting with the Physician. See, as a nurse I have to consider this family dynamic and patient in all of this first...so if I don't see a Doc giving a Dx and explaining things...I go to them first to make sure all the tests are in, the Dx is assured, and then remind or schedule a meeting (or have their office do it)..that is my job as a treater of PEOPLE, and as a Docs back up
I am very sorry for the situation you and yours are in...and I hope that communication is established...you are going to really need the information given to you in a way you understand (some docs..even nurses can still talk over you at times of stress...stop them and ask questions if you don't understand...). If communication is not being established, then you ask for a specialist consult and deal with the specialist...if that specialist isn't cutting it either..find another! Sounds harsh...but heck, I don't know about you...but when it comes to my family...I can do 'harsh' really well!!!!!!