Do any fem. nurses here have Stay at Home husbands/SOs ? - page 6
I know, i ask tons of questions - but i can't help it. I want to know. Do any of you have husbands who are staying at home looking after children and u are the breadwinner? I'm 27, my son is... Read More
Jun 8, '02Joined: Dec '01; Posts: 29; Likes: 3I stayed home with the boys, cause DH was a dairy farmer on the family farm, and I didn't want to milk cows.
I've always said that nursing has been the most wonderful thing for me. I stayed home when I wanted to, and found work when I wanted to.
I've always been able to come back to nursing in one form or another, and now that our sons are grown, I am going full tilt again, doing things I want to in my career.
Dh was a great dad, and good provider and we've had a good life up until now. I think you have to take the path that life hands you. If Dad can stay home and Mom work, why not? It doesn't matter as long as the kidlets are loved and made to feel secure, and not a nuisance or hindrance.
ShandyLast edit by Shandy12 on Jun 30, '02
Jun 11, '02Occupation: Owner Joined: Oct '01; Posts: 28; Likes: 3I have been the bread winner in my household for 5 years now. I went to school, then nursing school with 3 kids at home ages 3 DAYS, 7, & 14. My hubbie was a truck driver that was gone for 2 weeks home for 2 days. He never could understand the struggles I had to finally graduate with honors. He came in off the road, & I started my new career. He was wonderful with the school parties, he coaches a softball team for our middle child now 13, he cooks, cleans, & shops. My job is to work. He has now completed HIS 1st year of nursing school & still manages to keep up with the house. I work 40-50 hrs a week so he doesn't have to work. My income covers it & sends us on family vacations so far to Jamaica & Cancun. I'm really gonna hate it when he graduates in May of 03 then i'll have to do some work around the house again. My 2 oldest got to be home with Mommy, & the youngest, now 6, was home with Daddy. They are very well devolped kids so I don't think it matters in my case who the keeper of the kids are. But the youngest girl does like to fish, & play with bugs. I guess she gets that from her dad. haha
Jun 11, '02Joined: Jan '02; Posts: 6,855; Likes: 8,512Live & let live I say!!...Whatever works best for us as individuals & /or couples is the way to go.
So long as one partner is not having " a life" at the "expense" of the other. The only thing children really need is love, consistency, someone to depend on & trust & be a good role model. Whether that be a male, female, heterosexual, homosexual, Mum, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa... is irrelevant.
Happy working & Happy parenting folks!!
Jun 11, '02Joined: Sep '01; Posts: 16,606; Likes: 680Found out from my youngest daughter that she wants to be the one who works while her hubby stays home with their three children. She told me that my son-in-law has the patience for the children, and so he should be the one to stay home with them full-time. Whether or not hubby agrees to do this or not is yet to be verbalized from him. :chuckle So....guess that's one child down and two to go for opinions on hubby vs. wife staying home with the rugrats among my three adult daughters. My oldest one loves working part-time, but her hubby wants her home full-time. So far, she is winning that war. My middle daughter is a divorced mom with a son about to enter kindergarten. She has a S.O. who she wishes WOULD get motivated enough to earn a decent living instead of surfing from one job to another. She's a LPN going for her RN and will more than likely dump him when he no longer serves a purpose. She's my strongwilled independent watch out for number one daughter. I find all three of my daughters KNOW what they want and KNOW how to go about getting it, so maybe I didn't do too bad a job raising them afterall. :chuckle
Jun 13, '02Joined: Jan '02; Posts: 5,673; Likes: 159They're not nurses, but my brother stays home with the kiddos while my SIL works....she is a teacher...teaches music and directs high school Band.
He is a professional musician and picks up some gigs on the weekend (weddings, church services, etc) when she is home.
They have made this work well for them...they have 3 boys all in diapers (say a prayer for my brother's sanity, guys...LOL!) and the cost of daycaring all 3 could not be offset by my brothers work...so it makes fiscal sense for him to stay home with 'da boys'.
Jun 16, '02Occupation: Nurse Unit Manager Joined: Jun '02; Posts: 1From an Australian point of veiw, being a nurse has always been an advantage when raising my four children. I had 4 children over 11 years and managed to work all but 12 months of the whole 4 pregnancies. That is 12 months maternity leave out of the allowed 48months. I have found the advantage of shift work a Godsend. My husband has managed to work fulltime while I usually managed to work around his work and doing 3-4 casual shifts a week. We have never used childcare of any sort. My youngest is now 9 and my husband and I are both working fulltime-he works in the afternoons and I work mornings. We have 1 full day off together and 2 evenings at home together. We rarely see each other but maybe that's why our marriage has lasted 23 years, because we make the most of our time when we are together. The kids say they prefer it this way as well because they receive more quality time from the parent at home because the other parent isn't taking away the attention from the children.
Aug 30, '04Occupation: RN Specialty: 22 year(s) of experience in Critical Care ; From: US ; Joined: Aug '04; Posts: 3What works for some families may not work for others. I have to beleive that whats good for the kids and family is whats best. This is 2004 lol not 1950.
I have a nursing degree and the capability to be able to work 24-36 hrs a week and still bring home a decent paycheck. My husband does not have a degree, he is a simple high school educated fella, any job he could get that would pay anything would require him to be away from home frequently forcing our 3 kids into daycare, and then a majority of what he made would be spent on childcare. He also has a bad back and neck limiting the types of work he could do. My husband takes care of the kids, takes them to and fro to school, takes care of the house, takes care of me, keeps the yard up and works in his shop woodworking or keeping the vehicles running. I help with the house on my days off, and we do the shopping and stuff together. He has time to do fun stuff and so do I since I'm not burdened with everything I can enjoy my days off. I make enough to keep us comfortable, he makes things easier for me, I don't have to pay a daycare and I don't have to worry about whether my kids are being taken care of. That in itself is worth it to me. Is he lazy? No he's not, he's often more tired than I at the end of the day.
To us it is the fact that it is more profitable for me to work than him at this time. It works for us.
Aug 30, '04Occupation: RN, surgical floor Joined: Jan '03; Posts: 203; Likes: 14I work while my husband stays at home with my 11 month old and 5 year old daughter. I am a little puzzled at how anyone could think I am working and letting him sit on his duff. In the morning I come home and he has already gotten the oldest off to school with a full tummy and kept the baby happy through the commute and he takes care of everything including keeping the house quiet so I can sleep. Staying at home with kids is WORK and I am shocked that this is such an issue what does gender have to do with this? I stayed home the first two years with the oldest and there are many days I look at my husband and say it is hard isnt it? I remember and now he knows!
May 16, '09Occupation: Oncology Nurse - Solid Tumors Specialty: 2 year(s) of experience in Oncology ; Joined: Jun '07; Posts: 23; Likes: 2I am going through a similar situation even though i dont have any kids yet. We have been married for almost a year and i would like to start having kids by the end of this year (im 31). My job is wonderful and i dont mind working the extra shift to make things a little easy on the financial front. My husband is working right now but has agreed to stay home and raise our kids. Boy did this cause some talk among my family and friends! Why did we even have womans lib if we didnt want to share all the responsibilities? I dont see anything wrong with the wife being the breadwinner, i think it makes perfect sense. My husband is caring and wonderful and will be an amazing father. Thanks to this post im feeling a lot better. Im going to do whats right for my family, never listened to society so why start now? I love this website