Dear preceptor - page 6

Dear preceptor.. I came to you smiling, full of energy and ready to tackle the last leg of my orientation journey, with your guidance of course. I haven't really gotten any inclination on where that... Read More

  1. by   naturallyred
    Once again....amen, amen, amen!!!
  2. by   Ivanna_Nurse
    Quote from respectall
    WHY was this conduct permitted or even tolerated. There's NO place in my unit that this SORT of narcissistic and condescending behavior is endulge. I am a preceptor and it broke my heart TO SEE how tretous and painful your orientation was. This preceptor should have been given a discipllinary action and sent to remidial class. As a preceptor in our facility, we are required to take a class geard specifically to accomodate the need of the preceptee and NOT to place punitive criticism. Did you REPORT this preceptor's behavior to your DIRECTOR? this preceptor has a case of CONDUCT UNBECOMING! I advice you to report this event and so NO other new NUrse has to go thru this MALTREATMENT. nURSING IS A WONDERFUL AND FULFILING JOB, YOU DONT HAVE TO HATE IT BECAUSE SOMEONE ELSE DOES.
    I went into the boss's office and laid it out... I know what happened on my end, on the preceptor side, I haven't a clue. ~Ivanna
  3. by   Ivanna_Nurse
    Quote from naturallyred
    OMG! Did you have the same preceptor as myself. AMEN, AMEN, AMEN! I actually hate to make someone feel stupid in front of someone else..........I think it makes ME look stupid for doing it. Thanks for pointing out that nurses DO eat their young.......I have seen so many nurses on here state that it is NOT true.....but believe me they are out there slashing throats every single day.
    Amen Amen Amen that I am on my own!!!! SO glad! :spin: Ivanna
  4. by   Ivanna_Nurse
    Quote from cheesecurls
    i experienced the same thing,, i'm a new nurse then in a special area.. too bad, i quitted because of her.. now i'm back to square one, looking for a job. by the way, i'm a Filipino nurse
    You can always find your specialty just remember, don't let anyone make you quit! Dig in your heels and STAY.... they want you to run for the hills! Good luck, just know you aren't alone :redpinkhe ~Ivanna
  5. by   nurse jackie
    I am a new LPN and have also had a bad experience. I am so discouraged that I am considering going back to Accounting/Finance rather than go on and be an RN. Not only is it disappointing that nurses have to be treated like this from other nurses, but also from patient's families (or the patient), doctors, etc. After being on the "inside" of healthcare, it scares me to death to think that I (or my family) could get sick. No way would I want to be the patient...rude doctors, nurses, nurses who don't know what they are doing because someone didn't want to help them learn. I am quickly losing my compassion and desire to make a difference!
  6. by   zebsmom2002
    Part of me is curious. Some facilities require nurses to perform in a "leadership" role for staff nurse III or IV status. You may have run across someone who is doing this only to complete thier clinical ladder--not because they want to do it. Also, it's sometimes really difficult to get nurses to be preceptors--potentially another case of someone doing it who really doesn't want to. Not that any of this excuses their behavior, but it may explain it.
  7. by   Ivanna_Nurse
    Quote from zebsmom2002
    Part of me is curious. Some facilities require nurses to perform in a "leadership" role for staff nurse III or IV status. You may have run across someone who is doing this only to complete thier clinical ladder--not because they want to do it. Also, it's sometimes really difficult to get nurses to be preceptors--potentially another case of someone doing it who really doesn't want to. Not that any of this excuses their behavior, but it may explain it.
    Im pretty sure that this is exactly the case ~Ivanna
  8. by   zebsmom2002
    Quote from Ivanna_Nurse
    Im pretty sure that this is exactly the case ~Ivanna
    I always feel doubly bad for the new grad when this happens. somehow it seems worse when someone isn't invested in preceptorship at all than when someone really wants to, but is just bad at it.
  9. by   RN_that_was_bullied
    this is also considered horizontal violence or bullying. This woman is a bully and then she aligns other to bully you with her when she rolls her eyes at the woman at the desk. If the woman at the desk did nothing - she also participated in the bullying. More girls and adult women "bully" more than men. This comes from a deep sense of insecurity. The best thing to do when someone treats you like this is NOT to react to their behavior. Report them and let your supervisor know. Be very specific and factual not emotional about the behavior when you describe. Address her even though she is your preceptor. Do not be disrespectful but just mention to her some of the behaviors you noticed and them also advise your supervisor that you talked with her and what the outcome is. Being around someone like that is very stressful and lead to medication errors, poor patient care, etc. SO be very careful when you are around her. Find some articles on bullying or horizontal violence and bring them with you when you talk to your supervisor about your preceptor experience. There is NO reason for someone to treat you like this. This woman and ALL nurses who act like this need to be reported and their behavior addressed. DO NOT stand by and just let this happen to you. I know - I went through the same thing with a nurse and it was very painful but I GREW so much from the experience. I actually had to get into therapy b/c I was so afraid and so hurt and so STRESSED. I have learned to address these issues the very MINUTE I see them in someone else - tactfully - but I address I them. Good luck, God bless you for being a nurse.
  10. by   RN_that_was_bullied
    I SOOOO totally agree. This woman's preceptor is narcissistic and a BULLY - I posted below comments about bullies. Nurses in leadership roles particularly with new nurses - have a long history of BULLY them. That's why nurses get the recognition as "the only profession that eat their young". Its nurses like your preceptor that gives nursing such a bad name. She needs to be reported and written. All NEW grads reading this - if you get a preceptor like this go to your supervisor IMMEDIATELY and discuss the situation - DO NOT allow this to happen you. This person is a BULLY!!! pure and simple.
  11. by   RN_that_was_bullied
    TO: Registered User
    Age: 51
    Years Exp: 22
    Nursing Specialty: cardiac cardiovascular surg.
    re: your quote: Second, most of the nurses who precept do so because they are the most senior staff. They know more and have seen more than the other nurses on the unit. As a result they tend to hold thier preceptees to a higher standard than thier peers. If I precept someone, I expect they will know almost as much as me before they take over patient care- anything else is a disservice to the patient.

    I'd like to comment on that most nurses who precept do so b/c they are most senior staff. They know more and they have seen more than other nurses... this is such a "general" statement. In some hospitals this is NOT always the case. The preceptor this woman is talking about does NOT sound like "senior staff" person with leadership skills. She sounds like a bully. A nurse in a leadership role would NOT roll their eyes at their nursing student/preceptee or talk about them behind their backs. A good preceptor would address issues directly with her student - not behind her back. This nurse sounds like she might indeed have good qualities but by no means is she a good preceptor. She really should be written up - she is basically a bully.
  12. by   KarenBuley
    Wow! Glad you perserved, and I hope your smile and energy were waiting for you at the end of your orientation. My best to you!
  13. by   phoenixfire
    This made me laugh, and cry at the same time as I considered my own experience, so I thought I would share.

    Dear Preceptor,

    I came to your unit full of eagerness and excitement, willing to take whatever tasks you felt I was capable of. You dutifully gave me report and then vanished into thin air, leaving me with a critical patient while you filed your nails and texted on your cell phone. I want to thank you for that, because it gave me the opportunity to practice thinking on my feet, fending for myself, and reaching through my mental rolodex for facts I learned in class that applied to this patient. Thank you for making me realize that though I may not be ready to care for a critical patient on my own, I am no where near as incompetent as you made me feel. When I asked for help, you were nowhere to be found because lunch is so much more important that patients, but I appreciated the opportunity to learn to help myself and not depend on you. I thank you for the way you said "You need to drown" when I said to you "Help" because it illustrated for me what type of nurse I DONT want to be. Thank you for the scathing remarks about both my appearance and my intelligence, because it reminded me that it is only my opinion of myself that matters.

    Thank you for telling my instructor that I was a loose cannon, because it forced me to work twice as hard to gain her respect after I was reassigned to another preceptor. Thank you for telling me to my face that my patient would not have survived the shift without the care I provided while you stabbed me in the back by telling my instuctor that I had no skills with patients or their families. Thank you for doing absolutely no charting whatsoever because it gave me that chance to prove that I can document my actions and rationales more thoroughly than ever before. But most of all, thank you for remining me why I will be the best nurse I can be: because I care.


    Your Nursing Student.