I'm a new RN 3 months on an oncology unit, also low level monitoring, neuro, med-surg (we get everything). I just read the thread about 1st year med-surg posted by EDGRAD. Those replies were helpful and inspiring, but I'm really feeling stuck.
I went back to nursing school because I was working in a doctor's office and felt "stuck" there, nowhere to move up, since I'm not interested in management in any arena. My intention was to go to the OR, but after interviewing anyone who would listen, I decided on a year of med-surg. I worked on the floor I'm on now as an aide for 1 1/2 years while I was in school, so I kinda knew what I was getting into.
So the heart of the problem: I don't look forward to going to work AT ALL. I dread it. I have no issues with the people I work with, I love the patients, I felt my orientation was sufficient, etc. But I just don't feel "cut out" for floor nursing, especially with 10 patients on midnight. I have to look at my paper to remember the patients Dx while I'm in the room!!! It is so unsafe, and it's my patient's life and my license on the line. And I feel stuck there. The community college I graduated from had a perioperative program, so I thought I'd do that, but they no longer have it--training surg techs only now. I don't think I'd get alot of support if I went to my manager and said "how do I get to the OR?", since there is such a shortage of bedside nurses now. I'm afraid to let anyone I work with know how I'm feeling, because I don't want to be ruin any chance I have of moving on within the same hospital. On the other hand, I don't like feeling like I'm "putting in the time" on med-surg when I really hate it. Our sign-on bonus is paid out at 6mos, 1yr, and 2yrs. I know I can't do this for 2years, so I'm feeling rushed to make a decision by the 6 month mark. Do I spill it or keep plugging away? All replies will be greatly appreciated.