I apologize in advance, this is a long one - but I would really appreciate some advise from anyone who might be able to offer it. I am a new nurse. Before graduating from school I was working as a nurse tech on a specialty floor that I knew I wanted a career in. I was offered a position and I was thrilled beyond belief! Unfortunately after many long sleepless nights of talking, my husband and I agreed he would accept a position out of state that was his dream job. After all - he supported me through four LONG years full of tears, crying, stress, tests and clinicals - I could allow him to follow his dream now, right? I am a nurse - I can get a job anywhere. So I sadly declined, and had to put in my notice. My manager was great about it - she told me if we ever moved back I would always have a job there.
Well - long story short - we moved back. I called when we made the decision to move back - only to find out they had just hired 3 nurses a couple weeks before. There were no open positions. She said to keep checking the open positions posted on line and apply as soon as one came up, and that one would be opening very soon. I kept checking - but there was nothing. Finally after a few weeks I needed to work and the nurse recruiter found a position for me that she said would be great. I applied - had a series of 4 interviews and got the position. Now - during all my interviews I was asked why I was not going back to my original floor. I was very honest and said it was because there were no openings - I explained that is my passion and where I see my career going...
So now here I am today. I had my first day on the floor yesterday. I have never had to leave a patients room to vomit. Before yesterday. It was terrible. I nearly lost it 4 times and the last time did it. Please let me say I know how blessed I am to have a job. So many do not... but I did no go to school for a "job", I went for a career. I hate the floor I was hired on to. The staff is great. The manager is incredible. The unit however - is the worst I have ever been on. It could not be any further from where I want to be. I hate every minute of it. I left in tears. I cried all night. My eyes are welling right now thinking about it. I just don't know what to do. I know the patients here need and deserve kind and compassionate care - not someone who vomits while providing care they desperately need. It's pretty obvious to me I am just not the right person for this job. I am getting sick just thinking of what I saw and had to do today. I hate it. So much. I don't know how I am going to be able to get through 6 months of this so I can transfer within the hospital.
I ran into my old manager today... she asked my why I never applied to the TWO positions that were posted for her floor!! I told her I checked every day and it was never posted. She went and checked on her computer and sure enough - there were 2 positions posted - but they were only posted internally even though it was supposed to be posted to the public as well. I started to cry. All I want is to go back there - and stay there! Even though our hospital has a '6 month period before you can transfer' policy, she told me to apply anyway, call the nurse recruiter and explain how I feel (this area is my passion, and where my future is headed) and also to have her call her so they could talk. She said it probably won't change anything - but she is willing to try.
Has anyone gone through something like this? Has anyone been able to change floors right after being hired in? I am imagining the worst - if I am unable to move - I am going to have to stay on this floor and my manager will probably hate me after all this. It came down to me and 2 other RN's and they offered the position to me. If this blows up in my face it could make the next six months even worse than it will be now. Should I just start applying to other hospitals and leave the one I'm at? I can't imagine they would rather lose an employee than let them transfer, but I know rules are rules. Any thoughts?
