Finally a member! Need some advice

[RN112]

Hi everyone. I'm new in this forum. This is my very first time ever joining a forum. I have read a lot of discussions for quite a long long time now and never attempted to sign in. I just looked at similar topics that would help me. Majority of it did though. Well now, I feel ready to share my experience and be a part of this great and supportive forum.

I graduated at the end of 2003 and got my RN license and first job in July 2004. I was working at a transitional unit, like a step down unit from ICU. This wasn't my first choice. I had a call from this hospital the day I found out I passed the boards. I thought it would be a good start since they have a good program. My first choice was Peds. I had offers but turned down b/c failed the first time taking the boards.

During two to three months in the job, my mother had a stroke and I had to adjust changing shifts. I was precepting in the day and then switched to nights since that's my shift. It was a hard transition because at the same time I experienced panic attacks and would cry a lot before going to work. I was also extending preceptorship because I was so scared to start by myself. I talked to my boss and there was a time where my boss was going to transfer me to a Med-surg floor but never got to it. So then I started taking Prozac and was taking turns with my Aunt with taking care of my mother at home. The depression got worse, family intervened and they took care of my mom and I ended up quitting my job after working for four months. I also realized that the environment wasn't for me b/c I was the youngest one there, a new grad, and there was just no one to talk to at my same level.

The next thing was to focus on myself to get better with group therapy and seeing my psychologist and psychiatrist. About four months later, I had a bad reaction to the Prozac and started a new mood stabilizer. I recovered from the bad reaction to Prozac and continued the mood stabilizer. Then I got married and got another job.

This time it was Peds and it was the place where I did my senior preceptorship. It was cool because it was day shift that I liked and this was a surgical floor. I actually did better when I was by myself off orientation for almost a month. The crying came back and I was having trouble coping with the stress. I quit the job after a bad shift and I have been regretting it ever since. I tried getting my job back and my manager couldn't do it.

Right now it's been almost five months not working and glad to say that I'm not taking any medications anymore. I want to work again but not sure where to go. I thought about Med-surg adults, since that's a good area to start in to increase my skills. The thing that holds me back is lack of motivation and self-confidence. I also have this big fear of trying again. This time I want to work for much much longer than just four months.

What do you guys think?

[traumaRUs, MSN, APRN]

Hi and welcome. The first thing that struck me as I read your post was that you need to be stable first - both personally and mentally. Are you still seeing a psychiatrist? Are you in counseling to cope with the added stressors of ill family members on top of a stressful career? You have stopped meds, are things better now? Since you have had problems with coping in the past, what will be new about this experience? I think (IMHO) that getting yourself to the point where you can deal with additional stress would be the first step. Good luck...I'm sure when you are ready, you will do great.

[NaomieRN]

Hi and welcome to allnurses. One tip for you: never burn your bridges.

Before you quit a job, make sure you have another one line-up. Also, always give two weeks notice because you never know someday, you may want to come back. When you walk out of a job after a bad shift, they wont hire you back because in the future, you may do it again. They dont want to take a chance again.

I wish you would take care of your problems first before you seek another job. You can try praying and reading the bible. God is the greatest healing, the Great I AM.

Good luck to you.

[Daytonite, BSN, RN]

Start off slow. Try a part time job if you can. Sometimes taking things slow, being able to have a few days off to cogitate on what went on during a shift helps out a lot. Obviously, it takes you longer to adjust to stressful situations. There is nothing wrong with that, it's just that most hospitals want you saddled and out of the barn ready to go within a few weeks. Something else you might consider is home health nursing or private duty nursing where you have only one patient to concentrate on at a time. I commend you for not giving up. The start of my nursing career as I came out of nursing school was one rip-roaring roller coaster ride not much unlike yours, I imagine.

[jenrninmi, MSN, RN]

I just want to hug you! I think starting part time is a great idea! Take it slow...and know we're here for you to vent.

[shannonleighann]

I work med/surg otho/neuro I always thought that I would like to work in er or something like that. I am a new grad may 05 (not so new anymore). I love my experience on the floor, I have learned so much and continue learning all of the time. My fiance is in nursing school to graduate in dec. I have told him that I think working a med/surg floor is the way to go in the beginning. I have learned time management to the nth degree and learned how to deal with patients with various illness. The skills that you learn in nursing school for example catheters and IV's you get to do and practice, practice, practice. I am ready to move on from there with my skills but I am glad that I started on the floor and feel prepared to move to an acute setting. On the other side the nurses I went to school with who started in ICU settings are excellent nurses and feel prepared to go anywhere. It's all your decision, good luck!!

[RN112]

Hi and welcome. The first thing that struck me as I read your post was that you need to be stable first - both personally and mentally. Are you still seeing a psychiatrist? Are you in counseling to cope with the added stressors of ill family members on top of a stressful career? You have stopped meds, are things better now? Since you have had problems with coping in the past, what will be new about this experience? I think (IMHO) that getting yourself to the point where you can deal with additional stress would be the first step. Good luck...I'm sure when you are ready, you will do great.

Yeah, I know what you mean about being stable personally and mentally. I'm working on it. Yes, I'm still seeing a psychiatrist and also my psychologist. Right now I'm taking a therapy class on coping skills and so far it's working out great. Since I have stopped meds, everything is alot better. I just want to be more stronger as a person (like how I was back then before all of this) and to go on with my life. I know once I get used to better coping skills and reaching out to my support network again, I can balance work and personal life. --That is the biggest struggle, which is leaving work at work and not dragging it home.

Thanks for the advice everyone!!!!!