feeling hopeless ...(again)

[thejourney]

March 5, 2009

Well, I took the 2nd exam in the Microbiology class I am enrolled yesterday. Needless to say, this is a required class to continue in the nursing program I am in a a tech school in WI. I didn't know more than five questions. It is like I never looked at the material. Did I whirlwind myself into a panic prior to the test or were the questions more detail specific that I had ever dreamed? A combination of both I'm guessing. I just don't know what to do. I think I ate enough calories for a week yesterday, ugly face cried for an hour, and today slept until 4:30 pm (lucky me its my day off). I know the program isn't going to get any easier. What is wrong with me that I am not able to retain the information I am sincerely attempting to learn. I'm in my mid thirties and never really learned anything in high school so I feel in some regard, quite a few I suppose, the young girls have some advantages over me but that is neither here nor there. I still have parents, who I'm sure are just sick with my lack of achievements in life, perhaps even as much as I am. It has become harder and harder to have relationships with people because they want to talk about vacations and families and me, what am I doing really except school; which I hate am and not very successful at! I don't know what else to do with my life. I've lived in the same efficiency dump for like 12 years, am single, childless, and broke. I'm just so frustrated. I prefer to live in the solution not the problem but I just feel so hopeless right now.

I don't expect anyone to have the answers for God's plan for me but any feedback or just hearing from people that can maybe relate would be great.

God bless you!!

~the journey

[Miller86]

Hi,

I am currently in my third year of nursing, and trust me it took years/days of tears and endless hopelessness to get to where I am today. I have absolutely no one in my life and I have been alone for most of my life...well the last 13 years. I moved from Africa and left behind a tone of family members and have spend many years depressed trying to accomplish things on my own. I moved here when I was about 10 years old...and I have not gone home since (for many many reason but war being the main reason). However, I found nursing and it really brought back hope that I lost long ago. Nursing is DEFINATELY not an easy program and it does take a strain on a lot of people. You should be proud of yourself for choosing this program and willing to work hard in accomplishing this. Age has nothing to do with anything, there are MANY people in my program in their late 40's who have never done anything in their lives or worked at dead end jobs but what matters is that they have found nursing and that is the beautiful thing. I can't tell you what God has planned but you have to sometimes work hard to acheive the things you want most in life. Life is filled with struggles but we have to overcome them by thinking about the future rewards, nursing allows for so much opportunity and plenty of different jobs all over the world.

I still once in a while go through emotional moments where I feel like I cannot finish the program but I remind myself of all the great reasons to do it and how it has brought joy in my life. Some day I hope I can reunite with my family...until then I plan to work hard, I think you can too.

[BradleyRN]

Journey,

Rewrite the material in your own words, record the condensed version you make to CD, and listen in your car or anytime you can. Studying the material in your own writing will help. I once posted a thread of how to be successful in nursing school. Here is a link....here.

Good luck and be positive. Henry Ford once said "Whether you believe you can do a thing or not, you are right!":)

[NPs4health]

Hi, a few things I can share with you. First off, actual nursing is nothing like microbio class. Microbio and pharmacology are the most challenging prerequisites for nursing school. Actual nursing is much more hands on and less textbook/theoretical. You will use critical thinking, but not as much detail as microbiology. Given what you said about your schooling background, I would suggest trying to get into a study group with others in the class. I know it's intimidating but there's bound to be people who want to study. Befriend some people from class. See how the ones who are doing well are actually doing it. Do the assigned readings, talk to the teacher, go to TA hours if there are any offered. If you do poorly on the test, definitely go review it with the teacher. Microbio is a tough class and nursing school is a tough road. But if you think you REALLY want to be a nurse then keep that in mind and keep on going! Good luck.

[NursingRocks1998]

Just get through it- It will be worth it. I am in my second semester of nursing school- last semester I was very depressed and lonely and was feeling very sorry for myself. I was questioning whether or not I could do it and I almost quit. Luckily, I had an instructor that kinda knocked some sense into me. After I bawled on the phone, she basically told me that if I didn't have another plan in mind, and didn't have anyone to support me, I probably shouldn't quit without a Plan B. She told me to put things in perspective- it's just anxiety, its not cancer, and just to pull myself up, and she offered to help me get through it . She didn't pity me or play into my pity party, she said just keep going and I thank God for her daily. This semester is soo much better and I'm so glad I didn't quit and throw it all away. Try to talk to some of your classmates, ask your instructor for ways to improve your grade. Talk to someone- if you can't afford it, (because as students we are all broke), look online- many universities will offer free counseling from graduate students, or you can get in touch with your community mental health department. DON'T give up- you started for a reason- this forum is an awesome way to read so many caring nurses' points of view. Feel free to PM if you need to talk. Good luck- you can do it!