Feeling abused, disrespected and unsupported

[Nurse Beth, MSN]

Dear Unsupported,

I am deeply sorry to hear you are experiencing such difficulties in your new nursing position. I wish I could say that your working conditions are entirely unusual, but they are not. 

You deserve a supportive and respectful work environment, and taking steps to address the situation can lead to a more positive experience as a new nurse.

Stressors

You are facing several challenges all at once:

• the steep learning curve of being a new nurse,
• transitioning the gap from student to working RN,
• unrealistic real-world workload expectations, and
• impatient and unkind colleagues.

It's not uncommon for new nurses to experience a steep learning curve and encounter difficulties as they adjust to the job demands. Trust me that does get better with time. It is important to remember that you are not alone in this. Most new nurses experience these same challenges. 

There's no excuse for coworkers being unkind. Still, the experienced nurses on the floor are likely overworked and stressed, which might explain why they seem to have limited capacity to assist.

However, it's essential to prioritize your well-being and ensure you have a supportive work environment.

Reach Out

It is important to contact your colleagues, manager, or educator for support. It would be best to do some reality testing by speaking the words out loud and gauging reaction. This will validate your feelings.

Firstly, try to have an open and honest conversation with your immediate supervisor, educator, or manager. 

Share your concerns about the lack of consistent support, the misinformation during handoff reports, and feeling disrespected or unsupported. 

They may be able to provide guidance, offer additional resources, or address the issues with the staff involved. Communication is critical, and your supervisor should be receptive to hearing your concerns and working toward a resolution.

Your union probably can't address poor handoff reports or coworker relationships or bring about change in those areas. Still, they can help advocate for fair workloads and ensure compensation for working overtime.

Support

Right now, you probably don't have a professional support system. Building relationships with trusted colleagues can provide a valuable support system and help alleviate some of your challenges. Having one trusted friend or colleague who understands can make all the difference. 

Where I worked, we facilitated regular debriefing sessions with our new grads for six months for support and to know they weren't alone. 

You could also seek support from a more experienced nurse who may be willing to mentor or guide you. There is probably someone on your unit who is at the one-year mark and still remembers their onboarding experience. They may be able to support you. 

Self-care

To summarize, here are some specific things you can do to address the underlying issues:

• Talk to your manager, educator, or trusted colleague about your concerns.
• Seek professional help from a counselor or therapist.
• Connect with other new nurses. Read My Preceptor is Mocking Me
• Take care of yourself by getting enough sleep, eating healthy, and exercising. Manage stress with hobbies, mindfulness, and support.
• Set boundaries with your work, such as setting a goal of leaving on time and ensuring you have time for yourself and your loved ones.

Remember that you are not alone, and there are people who can help you.

Changing jobs

It is essential to keep learning and working hard.

Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to stay at your current job is a personal one. I would not recommend staying in a toxic environment. Still, it's important to determine if it is toxic or simply a situation that is bearable for a time to benefit you in getting to the one-year mark.

Other options other than leaving include transferring to a different unit or shift. Different units and even different shifts on the same unit have different mini-cultures. Sometimes night shift can offer a slower pace with time to read the chart and think about your patients and the plan of care.

If you can, stay with the organization for at least one year. This will make you more marketable when you do decide to leave. And have another job lined up first.

Remember that you are not alone in experiencing these challenges; seeking support and advocating for yourself can lead to a more positive and fulfilling nursing career.

[Peachpit]

I haven't worked in a hospital setting in several years but the OP concerns/complaints seem to be the norm now in a lot of hospitals for the new nurses. Upper leadership needs to really get a handle on this kind of thing or they are going to find no nurses willing to work the units.

[delrionurse]

Nurse Beth said:

Hello Nurse Beth,

I'm a new nurse working days on a MedSurg floor. I had 6 weeks of training under a preceptor and have been on my own now for about the same time. Some days are good and others are horrible. I've been in tears twice on the job and have had up to 8 patients to care for. Many of the experiences are new to me and I've asked for help relative to bedside procedures and/or computer documentation and for the most part I've gotten help but not all nurses are happy or willing to help.

I've been thrown into situations without consistent support so I walk away learning a piece of it - if I learn - from IV placement to using interpreter phone to doc prep for off-site procedures to irrigation procedures and so forth. I've been misinformed by nurses during hand-off report which negatively affects my day and makes me responsible.

I've stayed late several times to try and support the night nurse because my patients have so much going on and I walk away feeling insulted for trying to do the right thing. I feel like the new kid on the bus who's "hearing" all the right words (e.g., are you okay, do you need any help) yet being talked about behind my back. Do all new nurses go through this type of treatment?

I feel abused, disrespected and unsupported. Do I talk to management, supervision or union rep? Or no one and just go through the motions to continue to learn? I was so enthralled when I took this job and now I'm ready to walk. I look forward to all feedback!

Abuse and short staffing? I'd walk.