embarrassed by former preceptor

[heavenwith7]

First I have to explain that I was formerly an LPN. 15 years in long-term care. In my former position I had gained much respect from my co-workers, nurses assistants, LPNs & Rns. I worked as a charge nurse quite often, and received a job recommendation that brought tears to my eyes. I graduated 3 months ago, and am now an RN! I am so excited to finally be an RN. I'm working on a med/surg unit in a hospital, something I've always wanted to do. I usually don't tell anyone about my LPN experience, and I quite often feel very intimidated at my new job. I know I often ask questions that I really don't need to ask, but I'm feeling insecure, and just want reassurance that I'm doing the right thing. I'm really enjoying my job very much, I've been there 2 and 1/2 months, and I've been off orientation for about 1 month.

My preceptor has been there for 20+ years, she is charge nurse, and is very respected by all the nurses. She is also quite negative, and is rather grumpy.I feel that she's burned-out. I've been trying to not ask so many questions, but sometimes feeling insecure, they just blurt out. The other night I was asking her a question about something she had just said (non-nursing subject) and I didn't really hear her. It was change of shift after a very difficult shift for all of us. d/t staffing mistakes, we were short-staffed, and had numerous admits. There were 3 of us with 22 patients, 8 were mine. Her response was, " If you ask me one more dumb question.....", and she said it in a very loud, annoyed manner, while flailing her arms in the air. There were about 5 other people there, and I just wanted to crawl under a rock. Now I'll feel humiliated when i return to work tomorrow. And I'm not confronting her, I'm the newbie, & she's very, very experienced. But, I'm certainly not asking her anything unless it's absolutely imperative. I'll try to find someone else to ask. I'm a very positive, happy, and, I feel, professional woman. I've worked with various different personality types in my healthcare career; but I'm feeling quite embarrassed right now. It certainly can be exciting, but difficult to start over again.

[pookyp, LPN]

How rude of her! Smh.

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

That was inappropriate and rude of her. If you have a question about what you honestly don't know, then you should be able to ask it. As charge, part of her job is answering questions. With that being said, you are no longer on orientation, and if you are asking questions that you already know the answer to, but are not confident in what you are doing, you need to take a deep breath and move on from that. If there are procedures and such that you are not confident in, perhaps write them down and when you get home, look them up. It has only been 2 1/2 months. You will come into your own. But I would be very careful about asking questions to which you know the answer to triple check. Not knowing is one thing (and always ask for patient safety) but knowing and not having confidence in your skills is quite another.

[uRNmyway, ASN, RN]

I do agree, it was unprofessional of her to respond to you that way. However, we ARE human, we do get tired, and having been responsible for a few very unsure LPNs(and RNs, and CNAs), it CAN get a bit tedious.

Here is a little suggestion I was given when I started my first med-surg job as a new RN lacking confidence in my skills and knowledge, and getting on lots of peoples nerves with my multitude of questions.

If you have a question, approach the person with a possible solution. IE Instead of "My patient has chest pain, what do I do?!". Go with "My patient has chest pain, no history of MI, no other associated symptoms. I am thinking about calling for an EKG and putting O2 via NC on him in the meantime. What do you think?"

See, instead of just running to someone with more experience when you are unsure, which we ALL want to do sometimes, you are A)Showing a little initiative B)Showing your critical thinking skills. Even if you are WAY off for your suggested interventions, at least it can give your colleague or superior something to work on when they do want to show you appropriate interventions. It helps us know what your knowledge base is, what you need to work on, and it might also help your self-esteem. Because personally, if you come to me with your assessment and what you think you should do to intervene, and you are right on the money, I will tell you so, and depending on the urgency of the situation, I will congratulate you on your thought process. And if you are wrong, then I can simply redirect you, which I wont mind doing if you didn't come to me initially just completely dependent on MY decision making.

On that note, I know you said you did not want to confront her. But maybe you should, BEFORE a shift(not after when frustration and fatigue might be an issue again). Just calmly mention to her the situation. Don't be accusatory. Mention that you are still lacking in confidence, butter her up by saying that you have been asking her so many questions because you think she is a great nurse and you aspire to being as skilled as she is. Apologize for the incessant questions. If you are willing to try my above mentioned recommendation, then tell her this could be a possible alternative when you have questions for her from now on. And tell her, that while you do understand how we all get frustrated at times, that saying what she did to you in front of colleagues could affect your work relationship with them. That although you understand that she was upset with you and you appreciate any constructive criticism she might have for you, that doing this away from prying ears would be preferable if she has any further issues.

Anyhoo, just some suggestions. Keep us posted to let us know how it all works out! Good luck!