Dreams about Passed Patients.

[MiddleT]

I need opinions on what I should do. Here goes. I had a dream/ vision of the home of one of my deceased patients. ( Who passed 5 years ago) In the vision I clearly saw me driving up to the house. Instantly I recalled the name of the pt., the name of this wife, and the address. I have not thought of, saw or had any contact with these people. Then a few days later I mentioned this at work and the HHA that took care of the pt. , had the same vision. Should we contact the widow?? I know from experience that some family members would rather not see or talk with passed hospice staff because it brings back such bad memories. Please help. Thanks

[emmRN]

I probably would. When my mom died, we were touched that Hospice people checked in on us every once in a while. One lady called every day for weeks....that was annoying. But those that called occasionally.....I thought it was a nice gesture.

[tattooednursie, LVN]

That is strange!!!

What happens to me when one of my patients die, at night when I go to sleep, I hear something in my head that reminds me of them, If they played the gutar, thats what I'd here, If they made any distinctive noises, I heard them. It is strange.

I think you should contact the widow!

[rosemadder]

This is kind of on topic but off topic. When I used to be a patient volunteer after a very dear patient passed I frequently asked myself if I had done enough or done all I could do for the patient. One night I dreamed about my patient. He was sitting up (rather than bedridden) and was smiling at me. He looked healthy and he told me he loved me. After that dream I never questioned myself again. I am still in touch with his family. On the anniversary of his death I mail his family a card and we return cards at Christmas with each other.

[Agnus]

You mean your hospice does not do follow up care with the family?!!! Follow up is very important. Hospice is often more for the family than even the patient.

[renerian, BSN, RN]

I still dream about my favorite clients who have passed on.

renerian

[Scavenger'sWife, RN]

I think you should try to call the widow, even tho, or maybe even *because* it has been 5 years. Most Hospice programs only follow for a year, and then send a remembrance once a year after that. I think the widow would be very touched that you called. Just maybe say, "I have recently been thinking about you. How have you been?" My brother was a hospice patient...I would love to hear from his nurses.

[Wren]

I used to be a Hospice nurse and I occasionally still dream of some of my patients! It is interesting work and several of them will live in my memory until I die.

I like the approach mentioned to just call and say "I was thinking about so and so" and then see how things are going with the deceased's family.

Off topic, I once got to a new patient's house (who kept putting off the first appt) and she hugged me when I got there and said, "oh, it's YOU....I dreamed about you several times and I wouldn't have made you wait if I had known it was you"... I still get chills thinking about it and I had never seen this lady before.

Let us know what you find out!

[debbyed]

Call the family and tell them you were thinking about them and ask how they are doing. Judge from the conversation you have and the "feel" that you get deep down in your gut as to whether you should talk about the dream.

If you were a nurse that took care of my father or grandmother, hearing from you would be a comfort to me.