Difficult classmates - how do you deal?

[JettaDP]

We just got lectured by our instructor about the tension in our group. There is tons of tension and eye-rolling at every little thing. My group is beyond immature. And the funny thing is, most of us are over 26. What happens to maturity when a bunch of girls get in a room together? It's really frusterating and I am afraid my grades my become affected by the tone of our classroom. What should we, as a group, do to make the next two years go smoother?

[DA314]

The best things you and your classmates can do is act like adults.

Try not to react to the rudeness of others. You can only control your actions, nobody else's. Try to lead by example. Even if nobody follows suit, your instructors will notice your behavior.

The people that are there to learn will soon straighten out and act maturely. The people who are there to act like idiots will flunk out.

[Daytonite, BSN, RN]

what should we, as a group, do to make the next two years go smoother?

there is no "

we

". it starts with "

me

". sounds like the instructor pointed out one behavior that needs to stop: eye-rolling. unless the students want to start policing each other, and i don't think they want to do that, it starts with each person starting to act like an adult, being respectful of each other and not gossiping.

a really interesting book to read about how people manipulate and try to get the upper hand on each other is

games people play: the basic handbook of transactional analysis

by eric berne, m.d. it is a scholarly work that has been around for many years so it should be in any library. it is required reading for most people who become counselors. the description of the games is very interesting. power, control and recognition is generally what the formation of cliques is all about. some people, however, go steps beyond and turn it into nastiness.

i would imagine that since the instructor addressed this that she is going to be keeping an eye out for troublemakers. good for her for protecting the people and putting her foot down on the bullies. future nurses have no business bullying others.

[Hanna0225]

Ignore their stupidity, do what you are assigned, and act professionally. Don't let these girls bring you down, it's not worth it!

I honestly don't have any expectations when it comes to making "friends" in an academic setting, I just want to get in, achieve my goals, and get out.

[missjennmb]

I have run into this issue already this year. There are some very two faced, just plain MEAN trouble making people in my classroom. I started out wanting to get along with everyone.

But ya know what I realized? The amount of time and energy spent being part of that toxicity is much better spent worrying about my next exam. I just removed myself from the situation. I talk to people who talk to me, but I refuse to allow myself to get sucked in to all that. I just don't have time for it.

Be professional. Worry about the topics of the class and avoid getting involved in the drama. Let them roll their eyes and act like high school kids. And really... dont set out to make friends. Be friendly, but make your studies and school the ONLY thing that is important. Because in the end, when 2 years have passed, THAT is going to be what it best for you. The drama and chatting and paying attention to the difficult classmates will only get in the way of your dreams.

[TessaMae]

My class has over 100 people, I think maybe 10 men (not really sure). our mediam age is 28 I think and the same thing happens at our school. 90 differing female personalities clashing with each other, little time to get to know each other due to the intensity of the program, judgements being made based on one comment, rolling of the eyes, bickering because your stress tolerance is ZERO due to lack of sleep, time, energy, etc. I personally try to just due my own thing and be who I am, yes it still bugs me but I have more important things to worry about. Plus I try to rationalize and give people the benefit of the doubt nursing school is stressful, I know I have taken things out on my husband that are not his fault because I am stressed out. I think the advice of the other posters is good, worry about your self and your own actions that is all you can do, you cant change the others but if your professors are aware it will catch up to them!

[Meli08]

We are like 35 in my class, and even they are many nice grrls, most of them are super competitive, they always wanna know other's grades to see were they score. So, I guess u got a good group after all

[dorselm]

I know what you mean about the immaturity in class all too well. At my school, whenever a student talks about an experience they had in clinical that relates to the topic from the lecture, you would think someone is letting air out of a bunch of tires. You hear a alot of hisses and teeth sucking. The good thing about it is although there is lots of eye rolling and snickering in the back, we more mature students don't see it because we sit in the front. The clowns are left in the back to form their little high school mentality cliques.