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Decided not to pursue RN, may leave nursing eventually

I have had a tumultous last few weeks. I'm really stressed out today and have been feeling sick for the last 2 weeks or so. But I've decided I have no interest in ever getting my RN.

For nearly all of my 2 years in nursing I've been in home health. I've tried out facility nursing in nyc as a new grad and hated it. Home health has been OK for the most part. I've had some bad experiences with some cases.

Case 1: 3 yr difference between me and the client. This guy had gone through 4 pages of nurses. Was extremely nasty and manipulative.

Case 2: On for about 6 months or so. I was originally supposed to be a fill in. Towards the end my hours started getting sporadic because mom kept 'canceling' my shifts to give to another nurse. This lead me into the next case

Case 3: A very good case. The client had a condition similar to muscular dystrophy. My biggest issue was with their dad, who was too handsy. At the time I was too afraid to speak out because I had just found out my room was illegal. Facing homelessness and joblessness in a city like nyc is very scary. And I really didn't want to go back to the shelter.

Case 4: I had moved to a new city and took on one case. Even though I was on this case for 2 days nothing went wrong. It was pretty easy except I had an 'accident' when emptying a colostomy bag. For some reason mom was nitpicky. She had a problem with me eating on shift. I always made sure to do my notes and tasks prior to eating and I always cleaned up.

Mom mentioned being up during the night. But the second night I was there she stopped answering my texts. These were simple questions and I never bombarded her, but I never came back because of her refusal to communicate with me.

Case 5: My most recent home health case. I was there for a year. Client was also a kid. And she was difficult at times. I frequently got burnt out on this case. Mom was interesting. She drank but wasn't overly violent. At the end of my time my client was in surgery for 2 weeks. I never got an updated care plan for my first night back after not seeing her for 9 days. Mom wasn't clear on care and the shift ended horribly. Called out the next night. Mom never apologized and decided that because of 1 bad night I was no longer trustworthy. I never called out and always showed up early. She also fired a nurse because she couldn't take her daughter out to walks.

Also the agency was full of flaky people. One of the old supervisors was racist and gave me and other black nurses there a hard time. The new supervisor was nice at first until she started calling me drunk and telling me that she loved me and how beautiful I was, even though she was married.

My nursing 'mentors'

I also had bad experiences with fellow nurses that would supposedly watch out for me. One of them turned out to be pretty nasty and narcissistic. And the other one was the nurse I mentioned in the last paragraph.

I recently moved to the midwest and I'm already on shaky ground. I can't get my references to pick up. I was offerred a job and told EVERYTHING was clear a week ago. I got a text today (training was supposed to be tomorrow for me) saying my references weren't cleared and I wouldn't be hired on (apprently they didn't think one of my professional references aren't what they need) I've waited 3 business weeks to have my license transferred only to go through this.

I'm noticing that it's hard for BSNs to find good jobs. I've worked alongside 3 of them at my old home health facility and they all told me they could not get into a hospital. And one of the BSNs here mentioned that RNs don't get paid too well in the hospital.

It feels like I've had to fight tooth and nail just to get jobs and keep them in this field. Also, some of the nurses (not all) I've met online and at work are really nasty people.

My LPN job was a good opportunity for me since I went to a free program at Job Corps and didn't pay a dime. However, multiple things about the field have worn me down. I've looked at various programs and each time it hasn't seemed like the right decision to go into a program.

With this pandemic I think a lot of places especially hospitals will be forced to close. And I'm seeing that some nurses have been unemployed.

I'm waiting on a response for a new home health agency. Frankly I really wanted to take a break after everything that recently happened. And I'm finding it gets monotonous. But it seems my lack of good reference and luck will keep me out of any decent job.

Archerlpvn, LPN, LVN

Specializes in Home health, Addictions, Detox, Psych and clinics..

The home health you’re referring to is private duty home health, which is very different from intermittent home health. Maybe you could try doing a combo of private duty and visits? I like visits more, keeps you on your toes a little, use more Of a variety assessment skills, and hands on skills. Downside is the driving from home to home. Good luck! 🙂 

I’m sorry you are having a difficult time.  It sounds like you are burned out.  I worked PDN and most of the families are people I wouldn’t be friends with.  I found it more tolerable to take only coverage cases, as opposed to full time cases.  Less emotional investment from the family and me, and their were always an abundance off hours for me to get overtime if I wanted.  There are an abundance of BSN/ ADN jobs, I wonder about the experience your BSN friends have considering they tell you that finding employment is difficult.  

Thank you both. And you probably are right about me being burnt from nursing. I plan on looking for other educational opportunities outside of nursing. I don't think an RN would change anything for me.

I'm not sure why my BSN friends were having a hard time finding jobs. Being in a major city doesn't help.

Kittycool, CNA

Specializes in Home healthcare.

Off topic a bit, but I read you went to job corp for your LVN?

I was interested in the CNA to LVN route they offer, How was your experience there? How difficult was it to get into the LVN program? My local campus offers LVN at a partnered community college, so can you take additional college credits outside the trade while you are in the program?

Yea I did. There were several people in each of the classes that came all the way from California. From what I understand about the California LVN program it is even more competitive than the one in upstate NY and pretty much inaccessible if you live out of state.

For me getting in was really easy. I happened to do my CNA at the same JC location and any CNA in their program got first dibs entry into the LPN program. I also scored really well on the accuplacer.

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