Coping and strategies after failing

RNsRWe, ASN, RN · Jul 12, 2014

Well, the first and most obvious one is to get HER on this forum. She needs to be able to take the reins, see what went wrong, what she can do to make it right.

As her parent, you want her to stop hurting, and that's understandable. But if she wishes to be a professional, she is going to need to step in here and talk to her colleagues, ones who can get her past this with any luck. You've posted five times now on her behalf; it's time to step back.

Show her how to set up an account, and get her online! :)

Graduatenurse14 · Jul 12, 2014

birddoghound,

RNsrWe is correct. We hurt so deeply when our loved ones hurt and need to support them and help them in any way that we can within reason.

We need and want to hear from your daughter to truly be of assistance to her during this devastating time. There are amazing people on here who can help her but can't unless she asks for it.

I'm not sure as I'm new here, but it might even be a violation of the TOS in knowingly discussing a third-party's situation in such detail. I know that on some other sites that of been on for other things, the member/poster asking/giving advice had to really be the primary person. Now, perhaps people got around that but they were in violation of the TOS that they had agreed to.

birddoghound · Jul 12, 2014

Thank you for your responses and yes you are absolutely right about me stepping back. I just needed to hear what any of you had to say because it is such a raw topic for her. I read her what you all said but she asked me not to talk about it to her anymore at this point at all. It's all too raw at this point.

OneHappyRN · Jul 13, 2014

It's so hard to watch our loved ones struggle - especially our children.

I can only imagine how disappointed she is, but hopefully she see that this is just a setback. She can study and take it again in the near future and she'll have an better idea as to what to expect. Sometimes nerves just get in the way and maybe she was just so nervous she couldn't think straight.

Most likely, 5 yrs from now she'll be working as a nurse and she'll be able to look back and see that this was just a bump in the road.

Although it's devastating right now, She WILL get past this and move on.

The best thing she could do right now is realize there is NOTHING she can do about it at this point. The only thing she can do is get up, pull herself together and prepare for the next time around.

Hopefully she'll be willing to sign in here - if not for the moral support, than at least for great tips from people who have passed or failed and THEN passed the NCLEX.

Good luck to her!

akulahawkRN, ADN, RN, EMT-P · Jul 13, 2014

What she needs is to really read the Candidate Performance Report that she will receive in the mail soon. It will tell her the areas she was not quite up to standard so that she can concentrate on those areas. Chances are pretty good that she already knows the material she needs to pass. Going through school, my biggest problem with most of the exam questions that I got wrong was simply misreading the questions. The answer I'd select was usually the right one for the way I'd interpreted the question. Once I figured out that I needed to slow down a little bit, read the question, answer it in my head, then read the answers and see if my answer was close, then re-read the question while paying attention for any key words or phrases in the question. I actually had to remember to do that 2nd reading specifically looking for key word because those were often overlooked, leading to me select the wrong answer.

She needs to plan for, and take some longer practice exams so the she doesn't get fixated on the number 75. She has 6 hours to answer up to 265 questions. If it doesn't shut off at 75, she's still "in the game" so she doesn't need to panic. It could shut off at 76...

It's really that simple. Slow down, breathe, read the question, answer it in your head, read the actual supplied answers, then re-read the question looking for key words. Then breathe. Then answer the question and move on to the next question. The only question that matters is the one that's right in front of you right now. The past is gone and the future hasn't been set yet.

For now though, let her grieve. She can't take the exam again for another 45 days, so that should be plenty of time to figure things out and go for it the next time. I'm sure we all want her to pass... it's just up to her to get on it!