Called In because my coworkers are complaining about me

[nursinghopeful23]

I need some advice.

I was recently called into my managers office. It was after a fall occurred with one of my patients.

As she spoke to me, she told me she was getting complaints about me. I then asked who it was and what were the issues they were bringing up she told me my charge nurses were sending observations about me. She would not specify what they were saying. I of course felt incredbily dumb and caught off guard, as none of my superiors have been saying anything negative about my performance at work and I make sure to check in with them as well.

Over the next few shifts, i spoke to my different charge nurses one and one.

But none of my charge nurses could tell me anything specific and one was suprised( he said he had no complaints about my work).

All I was told was to answer my call lights and be a team player.

What is confusing is the way my manager spoke to me and made me feel as if I was making serious errors. I know for a fact I answer my call lights (unless im on the toilet or working with a different patient).

This is the second time she brought up my charge nurses complaing and several months earlier I spoke to each of them individually. And I could not get any feedback that required me getting called into the office or that there were questions about my work ethic.

At this point if I get called into the office again I am wondering if there is any way to escalate it? I don't feel comfortable with my manager and I do not feel supported by her.

Any advice!

I guess what Im saying is how am I supposed to improve if my charge nurses aren't communicating with me??? Am I missing something here?

FYI I work nights. So my manager does not get to see me work often.

[canoehead, BSN, RN]

Legally, if a complaint is not in writing it doesn't exist. If your complaining coworkers haven't been specific about their issues, theres no way for you to respond. If your manager calls you in and won't share the reason, or won't show you the complaint, well, then there IS no complaint, no matter what kind of mind games they are trying to pull.

I know that you can be fired for most any reason in some states, but if they want to get rid of you make them do it honestly. If they just don't like you they can still get rid of you. If you aren't doing anything wrong, it's unfair to put you through this baloney. Tell them you need guidance that is specific and actionable to improve. Going in to repeated meetings for vague statements of dissatisfaction is harassment by anyone's definition.

[ruby_jane, BSN, RN]

Review your personnel manual. Next time you are called in you will have the correct verbiage:

Is this an official counseling? Is this a level one (or two, or whatever the policy says) warning? Is a written report of this going into my personnel file?

Also, the advice to lay low, be a team player, and look for another opportunity are all sound.

[TristleRN]

If complaints end up in your file and you are actively working on taking care of them (real or perceived c/o as they may be), you should also have the right to respond, also in writing, and have that inserted into your file. I would keep copies of all communications and attempts on your part; of course, include that you discussed one on one with the charge nurses for details, and yet they denied having any specific issues (include dates etc., just so you can keep track of the time line).

Also, to avoid burning bridges, have a chat with your manager if she thinks that this unit is a poor fit for you and if she suggested you transfer to another unit. She may feel less threatened if it looks like the idea to move his hers. Sometimes, if they know you are looking to leave, the situation can improve... yes, not always, but sometimes. For example... I was denied a raise at a previous job, even though I strongly felt I was not being paid for my education and experience. Long story short... when I put in my month notice (to be nice), I was pulled into HR and offered a 5 1/2% raise. (A little late).

[HomeBound]

I am so, so sorry you are going through this. Just know, you are NOT ALONE. You are shedding some light on a serious problem in nursing (and yes, folks....since we we are all on a NURSING BOARD, talking about NURSING....I will limit the problem to oh....NURSING, for now.)

There are many here that will flame you and demean you as a "snowflake" or "too sensitive". That is not the problem. You may be sensitive, and it shows because you are worried about this particular thing. It BOTHERS YOU.

And this is precisely what these people want. No specifics. No line items to go through with you. Just nebulous "complaints", protection of the supposed person who brought them up, nothing real to point to and say "I can fix that." NO PAPERTRAIL.

They won't fire you. They're doing the age old thing that units do....circle the wagons against someone they don't like....and it doesn't even have to be a real reason they don't like you. It might be your hair is brown and you smile all the time. Who knows. They circle the wagons and turn their backs. It's subtle and it's vicious.

There is no leadership in this unit. You aren't going to change this. If the NM was one that would sit with you and say..."i'm hearing some grumbling, nothing specific, but is everything okay?" I would say try and fight this out. But she's part of the toxicity.

When I started in the ICU, I had already experienced some of the most toxic attitudes in the ED. Some directed at me, some directed at others. Equal Opportunity Toxicity. I was pretty gun shy by the time I went ICU. I asked specifically ..."if I am doing poorly, for WHATEVER REASON, will I be notified of this and given a chance to correct the problems?"

I was told...."Probably not. What you will see is you being slowly given 'less challenging' patients. Or the 'whiney/shouldn't be at ICU level anymore/pre op transplant where they just sleep all the time'...in other words, Med Surg-y pts instead of ICU pts. They will do this until you get the hint and leave the unit."

I couldn't figure out whether it was toxicity or just spinlessness on the part of the NM. It's spinelessness. Nobody had the cojones to offer constructive criticism. The RNs on that unit, some of them....worked together for over 25 years. A good number, in fact. And they didn't want/need anybody coming in and doing "new things" or perhaps having new energy. It was strange. The practices were antiquated, the RNs weren't up on the literature or new techniques/drugs/standards---and they liked it this way.

But it comes down to leadership. You are being bullied into leaving. Another reason they won't fire you? UI. Unless they can show a papertrail of opportunities for you to improve your supposed "poor skills"---you can file for Unemployment if they fire you...and you most likely will win. If you leave voluntarily...no UI.

This is a very, very old tactic. Not just in Nursing. And the attitudes are not exclusive to nursing, either. I worked at a major on the west coast in my former profession---and they hired a traveler who was.....simply AWFUL. I think...he was licensed in the primary profession, but had no experience in our specialty within that profession. He may have figured....he's smart, he can watch and pick it up. Not a do-able thing in that job.

Well....we had enough of his crap---asking the most basic questions, like "how do you set up this exam?" And because we had no effective leadership----we all abandoned him one day in the department while he was sitting there reading up on how to do the job. We all just "went on lunch" together. We knew he was getting a simple exam and we wanted to let him struggle through it---and let management see that without our help, he wasn't going to succeed. He needed to be let go.

It worked well enough---and I am NOT proud of it. I should never have participated in it--because I most certainly don't appreciate it when I am the "last to know" if I am or have done something wrong. Although this guy KNEW he was a fraud---it was unkind of us to do it this way.

He was let go that day.

This is what your colleagues are doing to you. If you can't pin anything down, and nobody has a hard copy of anything you have done....and your NM is protecting this "complaintant" with anonymity? You aren't going to win.

Transfer. If that's not possible, document. Document. Document. Every single thing. Every time you're called in and nothing is actually done for you to correct whatever it is that is supposedly wrong. There are cases where you can resign and still get UI---but you have to prove that you did everything you could to make the situation right and it was the employer that was the problem.

If none of this works...you can consult an employment attorney and see what they suggest. Legal recourse is always the last resort. There are options for you, hopefully to transfer out of the unit or even find a different job outside of this facility.

I am leaving nursing for just this type of passive aggressive crap. You should not have to live this way. The job is hard enough....going back to high school, which is what this behavior is...immaturity and low self esteem (which is why they bully you)....is not worth the meager paycheck we get biweekly.

Good luck to you.