Blackballed for leaving after only a year?

[Guest 1056340]

I am working (and excelling, according to my managers) as a first-year RN at a great hospital that has really helped to foster my professional development. I've taken classes, gotten certified, held leadership roles. Everything. It's been awesome. The only issue is that this job has put me in a long distance relationship with my fiancee. Now I'm a little older than most first year nurses because nursing is my second career, and my fiancee and I feel the urge to settle down and start a family together. I've been looking at jobs near my fiancee since she's not in an industry that allows for changes in location.

I've been given the opportunity to interview at my top choice hospital around my fiancee, for whom I could envision working for a long time. But I have a good working relationship with my management, and I feel like they are really grooming me to be a leader on the unit. And if I told them I want to leave them after only a year, they might be devastated. And I fear that devastation would make them blackball me or something. This is a very influential hospital and healthcare system. But this year of long distance relationship has been gut-wrenching for my fiancee and I, we hate the distance; and we've struggled to cope with it for this long, I cant imagine going significantly longer.

So, is being blackballed a realistic fear? This company has a policy (that I've found is actually pretty common) that states employees have to work at their post for 24 months before applying for internal transfers, so coworkers always talk about "just getting my 24 and moving on". And there's going to be a bunch of senior nurses leaving for grad school in the upcoming months as well. Would I be considered just another RN who's leaving, or would I be seen as a "defector"? I just want to know if other people have had experience in similar situations of resigning for family reasons and how employers received the news. Thanks!

[sweetydarling]

I wouldn’t worry about getting blackballed. Be professional and follow hospital procedure to resign. You’re in a professional relationship. You owe them nothing unless you signed a contract.

It may sound callous but you are replaceable and I doubt they would worry as much about you as you’re worrying over offending them or burning bridges. Express your thanks for the opportunity and experience and move on without regret or fear.

Management is used to people leaving or transferring for all sorts of reasons. You don’t owe an explanation but can tell your floor why you’re leaving, if you want to.

Do not worry for one minute. Do what’s best for your life.

[Nurse SMS, MSN, RN]

Don't overthink this. The hospital you are at may be peeved, but life goes on and they will continuing rolling along just fine without you. Turn in your notice, tell them why, thank them for the opportunities and express a desire to work with them again in the future. Then get on with your life.

[guest464345]

Good advice above....I'm sure you're a fantastic nurse but they are not going to be "devastated." As you're talking to your manager, she's already going to be adding "Tell HR to post TurquoiseTortoise's job" to her task list. It might be disheartening, but also a relief, to realize that you're a small part of a large machine. They'll be OK.

Double check your employer's policy as soon as you can, ideally before you get an offer, so you know when you'll be available to start. When I quit a job because I was moving out of state, I was very surprised to find that my hospital had a 30-day notice requirement for RNs. I'd never had a job that required more than 2 weeks.

[caliotter3]

Act as if you know that leaving this position won’t hurt you. Stop torturing yourself if staying indefinitely is no longer an option.