Asking for my job back?

[Sweetpea04, BSN]

I have been a nurse 2.5 years. All adult experience.

About seven months ago, I transferred to a completely different job taking care of babies. Huge culture shock, different people, different hospital. I have contract with my hospital system for another year, I can't leave unless I want to owe money. 

The position was also for night shifts (7PM-7AM). I accepted the job with this in mind., thinking I was going to love what I was doing as a nurse. I however, am not a night person and my partner/family all are daytime workers!! 

I went through 7 months of training that made me question my existence, my abilities, and stress me out like nothing else. I also felt very unsure of myself there and wasn't sure if it was a good career choice that I made. 

After a while I did get put on to the Night Shift. I did about five nights. Then one day out of stress and anxiety, I asked HR to transfer me back to my old job. I really hated the idea of being on an opposite schedule than everyone else and I wasn't sure about how happy I was..

I had a good rapport with my old manager so she allowed me to come back, and my current managers understood why I wanted to leave. 

I was allowed to transfer back 5 months early because technically, I was supposed to wait a full year before I was able to transfer anywhere else. 

Anyways, now I'm at my old job again and I remember exactly why I left. I don't like it here. I am happy to see familiar faces, and I am grateful to have been able to come back.. but I realize that I really do not love my job here and don't see any potential here to grow as a person or professionally!!

Now that I'm here I also notice that I did enjoy my job working with the babies. I liked it, the schedule wasn't hard to work around, and there is a lot more potential for growth than it is here. I liked the people, and the job even though it wasn't easy.. it did challenge me in a good way. 

I'm feeling regretful and even though I know, I already made my decision, and I completely understand if I'm unable to go back, but 

I came onto this sub to ask you all:

Would it be a bad idea to ask if I can transfer back? Or is it that unprofessional? Would I even make it through HR? Would it be bad for me to speak to the manager in person and tell her how I'm feeling? 

Can anyone offer advice? Thank you. 

[Wuzzie]

You, my friend, have done what I call "screwed the pooch". 
If you want to continue to be employed I would counsel you to put your head down, close your mouth, prove yourself a reliable employee and work your current job for a year while figuring out what the issue is. During that year a session with a career counselor to figure out if nursing is for you and regular sessions with a counselor to address your inner conflicts would likely be beneficial. You could also use that time to polish your résumé and begin looking for another job that may (or may not🤔) suit you better. 
Under no circumstances should you even approach your manager to discuss switching back. I'm fairly certain the NICU manager will nope out of that possibility and you will likely no longer curry the favor of your current manager. 
Unfortunately this is the bed you've made. The good thing is a year isn't that long to have to lie in it. 

[klone, MSN, RN]

Totally agree with Wuzzie. If a nurse approached me and asked to transfer BACK to the other me job, my response would be "Are you ***ing kidding me?”

[mtmkjr, BSN]

What are you looking for in terms of professional growth? If it's the same hospital shouldn't the opportunities be similar? What does the NICU have to offer that the current position does not? 

 

And I agree with the others - you've used up your oops card, no more punches left

[JKL33]

Quote

don't see any potential here to grow as a person or professionally!!

This is a matter of mindset and at the roughly 2-year mark I think it's an unfortunate one. No doubt close to a year of your time in nursing so far has been in training mode. You have room to grow professionally.

And personally.

Dang, I spent time trying to encourage you about Oncology on your other post