Asking for help

Published

Specializes in ED.

Why do you do other's work for them?

I've seen so many posts lately from people asking for 'help' with a med calculation or help with a care plan or whatever.

Why do so many people just GIVE the poster the answer? Why just spoon feed the info?

I guess I'm just venting here a little but it irks me to no end that so many people just voluntarily give the info so the OP doesn't learn a thing.

I really don't mind helping someone get to the correct answer but I refuse to just HAND someone the answer. What does that teach? Not ONE darn thing! If the OP actually tries to come up with an answer or at least rationalizes why he/she got this answer or whatever, I think we are more inclined to guide or confirm what the OP got. At least TRY to answer your problem.

I have a hard enough time doing my own darn homework. Maybe I'll just start posting my needs for help and y'all can do all my work for me. :uhoh3:

ok, vent over. Carry on.

m

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Specializes in ER, Critical Care.

Wow KeeperMom,

I don't understand why you would "vent" in a forum designed to assist and discuss ideas and/or questions that people have regarding the medical field as a whole. I perceived your post as not helpful and it seemed to come from a place that reflects you as a person. Healthcare, in my opinion, is about providing care and assisting people to get from point A to point B.

I have been in the medical field for more than 20 years in way too many capacities to discuss and I am not sure what you do or are planning to do in the medical field. Patients often ask question that they have the answer to but want a professionals viewpoint in order to potentially align there own thoughts, plans or misconceptions. I have taken care of people in the ER who wait 6 hours with a sore throat only to hear the Doctor say what they already knew before the wait; that they have a sore throat.

Being available in a forum like this to answer questions, that to you, might be a no brainer or holding someone's hand, and answering a question that might make someone's life easier, is really what NURSING is all about. It is a piece of the pie, of course, but it is Nursing! I am really sad that where ever you are in your life you chose to "vent" about a core concept of nursing on a site called allnurses.com.

I wouldn't want you to take care one of my family members. My Mom often asks me medical questions that I know she knows the answer to. Should I get mad at her and vent my opinion to her and say: that is such a stupid question Mom. You already know the answer. I hate when you do that. No, I would never say that.

My advice KeeperMom, if you are in the medical field or currently a student trying to move up as an LVN or RN, make a choice now of what type of caregiver you plan on being. If you plan to be the type that is represented in your post, get out now and save the rest of us the negative, non open minded care that is not needed in our (my) community.

Being a nurse is not just a 9-5 job. It is a true calling for the good ones. It extends out of the doors of employment and is represented in mentoring new student nurses in order to make them better, just like patients who depend on you much more than you probably realize. Leave the spoon feeding for educators in nursing schools that have a curriculum and plan with an end to a means. Don't bring negative, non careing onto a website that is a resource. You will just cause frustrations for everyone, like the "prejection" or insecurity you have displayed in your post.

You should self reflect on your post instead of trying to rebut my perception. Your response insults the 20+ years of my devotion as a Nurse, and I hope you decide which path to take in your career. WE don't need more negative people in our profession. We need caring, considerate caregivers that say "Yes I can" when others like you say "NO!"

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Specializes in ED.

So, you are willing to just spoon feed someone the answer to a question w/o bothering to explain why or how? What happens when he/she is on the floor needing to do a med calculation and doesn't have you standing over his/her should to tell 'em the answer?

How does spoon feeding TEACH anything?

If you bothered to read my post, you would have read that *I* don't mind helping people. I just don't want to do everyone's homework for them. This has absolutely no bearing on how well I care for and educate my patients. I just personally don't want a nurse caring for me or my family that can't figure things out on his/her own.

Further, I never insulted your experience as a nurse. You read into that on your own. If you are teaching new grads or precepting students and you are just handing them info and not explaining why or how something works on the body, you aren't a good teacher but rather an enabler.

Ever hear of the phrase, "Give a man a fish and he eats for a night. Teach a man to fish, and he eats for a lifetime?" Same principles apply.

If you want to continue to do everyone's homework, be my guest. I just hope you have a lot of time and energy to keep feeding the machine.

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Specializes in ER, Critical Care.

Thank you KeeperMom for your response and for proving my point in my response. Your response and post reminds me of an old saying: "Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining." I would bet money that you are not a nurse but are studying to be one. I hope for the sake of others that your lacking ability to recognize a narrow mind improves before you harm one of your patient that doesn't fit the perfect world you are living in.

Take care and study hard.

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I agree completely with the OP, and also get v. tired of students asking us to do their homework for them, when they have made no apparent effort to do it themselves but just want someone here to give them the answer.

It is not being negative or uncaring to refuse to spoonfeed info to students. Doing so is not good nursing practice -- I've been a practicing nurse, as a generalist and an advanced practice nurse and a nursing educator, for a few decades now, and one of the things I've always found to be true is that it is generally a mistake (in terms of professional practice) to do something for someone else that they could do for themselves. It feels v. gratifying at the time to the "helper, " but creates dependence rather than helping people achieve independence, which is what we want for all our clients.

I'm all about mentoring students and "baby" nurses, but we're not doing them any favors by doing their homework for them. Right on, KeeperMom! :)

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Specializes in ED.

How have I had a narrow mind? And why won't you answer any of my legitimate questions but you are so quick to do someone's homework for them? Maybe my understanding of a narrow mind is 'off' but spoon feeding someone answers is more narrow minded than me, or anyone else, trying to help some widen their knowledge and learn HOW to find the answers to the questions they have.

::sigh::

Yes, I am a student. That really isn't too hard to figure out since I've mentioned doing my own homework several times here. I am also a career changer late in life and not naive. I do not need to justify or explain anything to you or anyone else here for that matter but I stand firm on my beliefs that we, as a message board community, are enabling people by spoon feeding and are really doing a disservice as care givers and educators.

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Specializes in Gerontological, cardiac, med-surg, peds.

Moderator's friendly reminder: Please keep discussion civil and avoid personal attacks. Debate the ideas, without attacking the poster. Thank you.

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Specializes in Home Care.

I smell something :sofahider

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Specializes in Gerontological, cardiac, med-surg, peds.

Thread closed.

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