Anyone got any good nurse/doc/hospital/enema jokes?

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Okay, let's all tell a good medical related joke. The one who gets the most kudos wins. I'll start first. It's a little off-color but don't worry, I'll asterisk the bad words out.

Question: What's 18 inches long, black and hangs in front of an *$$*#**?

Answer: A stethoscope on a surgeon!

Yeah, I know, pretty bad. Okay, let's hear yours.

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Specializes in Plastics. General Surgery. ITU. Oncology.

What is the difference between God and a plastic surgeon?

God dosen't think he's a plastic surgeon.

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Specializes in Plastics. General Surgery. ITU. Oncology.

Bad netiquette to post twice I know but another popular one on my old surgical ward was:

Q: What is the definition of a holistic orthopaedic surgeon?

A: They consider the whole bone.

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Specializes in ICU/CCU/CVICU/ED/HS.

How do you make a surgeon taller...

Give him Viagra...

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How do you make a surgeon taller...

Give him Viagra...

:bdyhdclp:

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..."some ***hole's got my pencil!"

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Specializes in PACU, OR.

This story was told to me by a surgeon.

An RN phoned him at 3am one morning to tell him his patient could not defecate. His response was, "Sister, take two enemas; give one to the patient and the other one to yourself, then you can both go s++t!

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