Anyone ever have to give report to that one nurse who's grouchy all the time?

[Littleguccipiggy]

Hello! I've been working at my current job for about three months, I transferred there from a different location. Overall I like my job, my coworkers are nice, but there's just that one nurse who literally acts like she hates her life all the time. She's rude to everyone, so I know its not anything personally against me, but it just brings me down when I have to give report to her. She doesn't pay attention to what I'm saying because she's looking up other patients so I end up repeating myself. And its just my luck that something always seems to go wrong when I'm giving patients to her, nothing serious - patients having "code brown" after I check on them, labs needing to be redrawn; but she always complains about me to the leads. My leads will ask me about the complaints and when I tell them they're from her, they respond with "oh ok, nevermind then" which makes me think she's also a constant complainer. I'm not a new grad, I still feel like she's got that "eating their young" mentality with me. I usually don't have to give report to her very often, but when I do, it takes me days to recover from her toxic attitude. Sometimes I think I'd be better off transferring back to my old hospital then having her constantly complain about me. Sorry, I just needed to get some weight off my shoulders, thanks for your patience everyone!

[SmilingBluEyes]

Give report, succinctly and to the point and go on with your life. They are the problem, not you.

[Ellie G]

We had one constantly grumpy nurse and I had to give her report 3 days in a row. On the 3rd day, I had had it and said "I dont

know what happened to you in your life that you're so unhappy, but I'm sorry it happened to you" Never had another issue with her. We're not exactly friends and I have since transferred to another unit, but we always acknowledge each other warmly

[LittleTwinStars, ADN, BSN]

My rules of report time:

1) If you are being unbearably rude, then I won't take or give report until you are able to act civilly. I can wait.

2) If I am giving you report, please don't constantly interrupt with questions. You are filling out your blank report sheet, and can see what information is missing. I am going down my full report sheet, and will definitely miss something if you make me constantly jump around from neuro to plan to IV access to GI. Please ask questions relevant to the body system I'm on, or jot them down and ask at the end or when the pertinent part of the report is given. Interrupting also means that you're probably not listening as much as you should.

3) If you come in angry, complaining about your assignment, and spewing verbal and emotional diarrhea, I'm going to give you a wide berth unless I don't think that I may become a victim of the wounded tiger. I'm not going to risk being your emotional toxic waste dump or try to give report to someone who is probably too emotionally fired up to properly listen.

[Adele_Michal7, ASN, RN]

Totally . . . every place I've worked had 'one' or maybe two, but at least one that EVERYONE dreaded passing off report to.

My last job there were actually two of them. One was a very experienced nurse, the other fairly new. I was 'new' to acute care nursing after several years in psych, and they scared the crap out of me, plain and simple -- until I realized I was relating to them from a very 'victim-y' point of view.

It isn't the most professional thing I've ever done, but I needed to defuse this in myself, so I started referring to her as George Forman or "the Grillmaster" when another nurse (usually a new one) came to me with their latest adventures in giving her report. Just so the newer nurses would have a 'humor' edge to cope with her. She would genuinely lose her temper, slam charts down, pound her fist, raise her voice. That happened with me once, and I went to the manager because that is bullsh*t. Enough people complained that I sensed a turn around in her after a while.

She was SO insecure and anxious it wasn't funny. She was out of control with her anxiety -- but she disguised her fear with anger. I know, SO common.

The other 'one' was no different, just absolutely TERRIFIED that she was going to get in trouble. She had this assumption that 'my license is on the line!" and absolutely NO adult understanding of cause and effect. Whatever evening shift left undone was a personal attack against her, literally.

So beneath the Grillmaster persona in such nurses is sheer terror. And they need to get an effing grip. No one appreciates it when someone acts out their psych issues and refuses to take personal responsibility. I sense they have ZERO insight into themselves, and no matter where they go, they play out the same drama, and drive everyone around them crazy.

This is THEIR problem, their psych issues if you want to look at it like that. The quality of your report is on you to determine, that nurse wouldn't know a good report from a bad one, they react the same.

I tried very light 'joking', and without sounding insipid, I complimented them for what was truly good things they did. It took a while but both of these gals began to feel more safe around me, or something. Beneath their Grillmaster persona they were killing themselves.

Now I don't think there is ANY excuse for acting that way, I don't care how anxious or terrified a nurse is, they are responsible for how they act, period. But management is rarely going to do anything about them. So it falls upon you and me to cope so that we aren't marinating in their toxic personality disorder for days after report. THAT is complete nonsense. I refuse to waste a moment of my life cringing or wringing my hands because some semi-psycho won't deal with her anxiety disorder. Whatever their persona, arrogant, mean, drama queen -- I don't care. They can play out their psychological problems all they want but I don't have to 'buy' into it or take it seriously and most of all, take it home with me.

Very well stated! I deal with people like this all too much. I make it very clear I will not be playing into their psychopathy!