I could really use some opinions/advise from people who understand the extremities of NS.
Okay, so basically I was going to this school where I am basically guaranteed a spot in the nursing program. Problem is this is a private, very expensive school that is 30-45 minutes away. Luckily, I have $20,200 in scholarship money at that school. However, I would still need to take out $10,000 a year in loans to cover child care and commuting expense. Another good note, this is a BSN program from a really nursing program. Also, I am an army wife. My husband is choosing to try out for special forces and, basically, continue to try out until he is selected. This means the rest of us are just waiting in the unknown because, if selected, we will move probably within 6 months of him being selected... lovely right?
Another consideration, I have two children. A 5 year old and a 2 year old. My son does not do very well in daycare. Last school year, I put him in full time while I went to the school mentioned above. I absolutely loved that school but felt extremely selfish bc maintaining a house, school, and two children (DH was deployed) almost drove me crazy. I cannot work because there would be no one to watch the kiddos in the evenings or on weekends.
After struggling with what to do, I decided to go to school half time to get remaining prereqs done and really hit NS when my youngest starts school. However, who knows where we will be living and what kind of NS is around there.
So, what I am looking to be answered is: Do you guys think I am making the right decision by waiting to go to NS until my son is in school, turning down said scholarships? Or, do you think I should just go ahead and put him in daycare and deal with the craziness for the next three years and pray we do not move...
I am at a major loss of what to do and I am to the point where I just cannot stop crying and I can't make a decision. No matter what I try to decide, it feels like it is not the right choice.
Thank you to who ever takes the time to read this and respond. I really appreciate any and all opinions.
I'm looking at this as an Army brat. Born and raised with a military dad.
And my thoughts are...you will NEVER have a guarantee that you will stay put long enough for a particular school. This will forever be a problem so why keep pushing it later, when the next station he is sent to may do the same thing? It sounds like he is carreer military. If so, you are facing a life time of moves. You cannot make whethere he gets new orders determine your dreams. You will never have them then.
If you want to wait until your child is in school...again, what if you have more babies? Will you forever put your goals off because another child needs day care?
It may be this particuluar school isn't the best fit for you, but there are options. And there are also scholarships available to military wives, plus the G.I. bill. Figure out first if you really want to be at this school or not. Then let the rest of your decisions be based off of that.
I can't tell you what to do, but I can say military kids are resillient. We are bred to be that way. Keep me posted on what you decide. I will be thinking of you.
I don't know if length of time served has ANYTHING to do with the GI bill, but there are several women at my school who are using their husband's GI bill to be able to attend school themselves. I haven't asked about that, as my husband was out of the military and had already used his when I met him. LOL.
Good luck with your decision. (And as a Navy brat, I can affirm that what LCinTraining said about military kids being resilient is true.) And even if you were a civilian mom, the decision to leave your kids in daycare is just as hard. I had to do that, THEN my husband took a job transfer out of state. (I was lucky and had family I could live with though, otherwise we could NOT have afforded for me to stay in school.)
LC, I completely agree with what you are saying about continually pushing it back. Luckily, we are done having kids :) I did not grow up around the military, at least not directly, so hearing that mil kids are resilient makes me feel a lot better. Reminding myself I cannot shield them from life is in need of constant reminding. LOL
As for DH's GI bill, they (the military) semi-recently changed how easily transferable it is. He has to have served six years before he can transfer and then commit to X amount of service. The committing isn't a problem because, as you guessed, he is a lifer. I swear, they will have to kick him out when he hits 27 years! So, he will transfer it to me so I can use it to pay for grad school.
Since this lifestyle is not going away, which I don't really mind as long as I can finish school, I am not going to stop going to school. After speaking with the BSN school, they told me I should be able to get the same amount of scholarship if/when I am able to return. So, I have enrolled into the local community college and I will spend the next semester/year taking remaining prereqs for various BSN programs. Then, once DH is either selected or gets promoted, I will hit NS full time. I feel that this is a good compromise bc I am still going to school, but I am not taking out a million loans :) Best of all, I feel more at peace. Thank you guys so much for listening and giving your opinion on the matter!
Now, I am just nervous for all the online classes! I have taken them before, but never this many at once. I am one of those annoying students who go to class everyday, participate in lecture discussions, but never opens the book or reads anything and gets an A. Now, I have to read... a lot! :/
Yes you will read a lot, but I still found online courses easier, if that helps at all.
I think just talking things through has helped you decide what you want to do. Best of luck in your venture, both to you and your husband.
And yes, yes we are resilient. I'm all mad about the possibility of having to move from our dream house right now. But I know I'll survive where ever we end up. My little short civilian children however, DEVASTATED and swearing they will never forgive me. Wait...I didn't pull that nonsense until I got to high school! Even still, my dad switched stations five weeks after we moved there LOL.
My poor husband is ready to cave to a hole in the ground house just to stop the tears and keep them here. I'm all...no. If we move, it will be decent, and in a decent area, and where they will have more opportunities. You will not move them to a bad area just to appease them because they will survive a move, and they will make new friends and even if you stay, next week they may hate it anyway. Give our kids some Army backbone you civilian dad you!
My honest to God no-BS answer? Don't give up on scholarships and free money. You need to be able to take care of yourself especially if your husband is going into SF and actually gets in. If anything your husband should be waiting a year to try to get into SF school, not you. Your career will take care of your family for decades, SF won't.
Sorry, just a no-nonsense military family opinion.
My poor husband is ready to cave to a hole in the ground house just to stop the tears and keep them here. I'm all...no. If we move, it will be decent, and in a decent area, and where they will have more opportunities. You will not move them to a bad area just to appease them because they will survive a move, and they will make new friends and even if you stay, next week they may hate it anyway. Give our kids some Army backbone you civilian dad you!
HA! We are still at our first duty station, been here for two years. I am SO ready for the next place! I do not mind it here, but I actually like the idea of moving around... New places and new adventures. I just want to finish school somewhere in that mix. Still, I need to get use to the not knowing what is going on.
Before deciding on selection, my hubbs was talking about re-enlisting for stabilization. :uhoh21: So I am just hoping he gets selected. It is time to PCS and I think I would like NC
My honest to God no-BS answer? Don't give up on scholarships and free money. You need to be able to take care of yourself especially if your husband is going into SF and actually gets in. If anything your husband should be waiting a year to try to get into SF school, not you. Your career will take care of your family for decades, SF won't.
Sorry, just a no-nonsense military family opinion.
I agree that SF should wait; however, that is not happening.
LCinTraining
308 Posts
I'm looking at this as an Army brat. Born and raised with a military dad.
And my thoughts are...you will NEVER have a guarantee that you will stay put long enough for a particular school. This will forever be a problem so why keep pushing it later, when the next station he is sent to may do the same thing? It sounds like he is carreer military. If so, you are facing a life time of moves. You cannot make whethere he gets new orders determine your dreams. You will never have them then.
If you want to wait until your child is in school...again, what if you have more babies? Will you forever put your goals off because another child needs day care?
It may be this particuluar school isn't the best fit for you, but there are options. And there are also scholarships available to military wives, plus the G.I. bill. Figure out first if you really want to be at this school or not. Then let the rest of your decisions be based off of that.
I can't tell you what to do, but I can say military kids are resillient. We are bred to be that way. Keep me posted on what you decide. I will be thinking of you.