I am writing this totally heart broken and at my wits end.
I started my career as a nurse receiving compliments on what a good job I did. I felt that I was one of those people that had to do my job well and couldn't settle for any less. I had to chart well and provide the care that patients and families were more than satisfied with. They had to know they could count on me and that I was going to be there for them.
After 15 years and multiple hospital settings I have come to realize that it doesn't matter. Over the years, I have witnessed that many of hte units are run by managers and assistant managers that couldn't handle floor nursing and yet their demands on their employees are unrealistic. The people that they choose to be in charge and manage the floor are picked based on friendship and loyalty rather than hard work.
I have worked side by side with techs who run the unit and force nurses to do their work while they find time to sit on the internet or phone and then get out on time while we are stuck over finishing our work. I have walked into many patients rooms to pass pills only to find they had no water, haven't been turned or need urine emptied from urinals or pans that are overflowing. I can't tell you how many pans I have see stained with urine or feces because they don't get rinsed. How often patients are tied up in lines and cords.
I find myself picking up the slack and doing all of the jobs that countless others do not. Why can't people untangle lines? Why aren't pans rinsed from urine or feces? Why won't the techs do tech jobs and make sure people have water or that other needs are met?
In the end, what you get is punished. Punished because you couldn't get your work done. Punished because you couldn't meet everyone's needs and a patient or family felt you took too long to get to them and there was nothing you could say or do to make it right when you knew in your heart that it wasn't your fault. Instead, the blame is on the fact that there is too much for you to do or there is a major imbalance of productivity amongst workers.
The reason for the nursing shortage? Overworked and not appreciated and abused. You can't stick up for yourself, you can't tell them why you couldn't get things done - you can't say nothing. 15 years and nothing to show for it. I have tried nearly every hospital around and I find the negative complainers and the staff that knows how to socialize are the people that are respected and appreciated. It's not about the people that are out there busting their tails. Everyone knows there is a shortage and why but no one does anything and the biggest culprits are the administrators of the hospitals. The majority of those couldn't handle floor nursing or hardly ever experienced it at all.
I leave behind a lot of families and patients that thought I was a great nurse. But when you can't please one in a hundred or more you are a bad nurse. People don't understand the level of demands on a nurse. It is a downright abusive field with little to no appreciation surrounded by many people who are disappointed with their jobs and their choice in the career.
My final blow: After 3 years of sweating to please my last employer and taking the abuse of never hearing anything good - only bad. I went back to agency and went back to a hospital that I worked at 3 years ago. I knew that this hospital had a bad reputation for poor bedside care. Half the staff of any unit could easily be float and agency. The regular staff on the floor was made up of mostly young girls in tight spandex and inviting clothes working on socializing with doctors and hanging out at the desk all day long. Call lights were on non-stop but these girls would not answer them. The techs were busting their tails here. The agency nurses were working but the in house floats were sitting and socializing too. I ended up with a patient with a very bad attitude that was a complainer and law-suit happy. She was furious that for 4 days not one person followed through with obtaining her records from another hospital. It fell on me. I also had a patient admitted with respiratory distress which she shared a room with and could see I was busy. With her personality, she was angry at the moaning of the elderly lady who couldn't breath and was determined to get me to stop and cater to her to get on those records. When I got my respiratory patient stablized, I did just that. Turns out that the other hospital never received any fax requesting the information. This lady hated every person she had contact with at that hospital and wanted to call an agency to get them shut down. I'm sure you know the type by now. So....guess what. I was told today that I was not welcome back because of her complaint. I would literally pull a chair up and sit next to this lady and let her vent. I gave her my heart and I got booted. The nurse that she had the next day was a guy that sat around socializing and didn't care one bit about her. He was regular staff and he was NOT going to go out of his way. They all get to keep their jobs but the nurse that took the time out to take care of her is out the door.
I need a job or I wouldn't take the abuse. But, I know for a fact that this hospital is never going to get it. They were like that 3 years ago and now they have more floats and more agency staffing them. This is a big and reputable hospital.
The hospital I worked at for 3 years was dumping more and more tasks on the nurses and they were all unhappy and complaining. We lost good hard working techs and they were replaced with people who didn't want to work or nursing students who were tired when they came to work and were kicking their feet up taking it easy. Management loved those people.
I suffer from spinal degeneration and pain and I never get to sit down. My job is harder because they are not pulling their weight.
There is nothing left. I still owe for my loan and I am scared to death to take another nursing job. I know it is not going to be any different. I hurt. I lost my insurance and after all that I worked for I have nothing to show for it but bills and a destroyed ego and heart. I feel as though I am the misfit. I am the one who isn't right. I am wrong. I can't even bring myself to waste time on another application since I don't want anything to do with this career any more. I am going to lose my home, my vehicle and everything else.
I have noticed that the field is being taken over by young graduates who are more worried about looking sexy and socializing than working. Patient satisfaction has gone down the tubes and the senior skilled nurses are getting nowhere in this field. There is nothing anyone can do. We all know it is happening but we can't do anything about it.
I am so sorry for the experience you have had. After 15 years I am sure that you have explored other areas of nursing. I think taking a break from nursing is a good idea. We are only here for a short time. It's important to be happy and be able to look forward to each day. There is a light at the end of this tunnel. You are in my thoughts and prayers as you find your way through this difficult time. Hang in there! :hgu:
Frankly, I don't see many of us leaving - what will happen is this: and that trend is already here. There will be core staffing, the rest is all travel nursing/agency nursing. They pay better, incentives are great. Health insurance sucks. It takes care of burn out, as you deal less with the politics. The unit I work on, which is Oncology, few stay beyond bonus incentive years, then move on. I can't believe, I have been there a year already. And, since I have the incentive of needing decent healthinsurance for the next few years, get rid of bankruptcy burden from working for Medicaid, and not get paid! There are issues I have to deal with for another 3 1/2 years. But seeing the staff change in that one year is unreal. But it's the way of the future. This makes it more efficient for the employer, travellers are there for a limited amount of time. Nurses are still necessary, but nurses longterm is on it's way out. It'll turn all into temp nursing. What do you think...Maine!
"I don't see many of us leaving.." They are. Over 330,000 licensed nurses are inactive. If you read labor statistics, more than 50% left because of this here. Others left for better or better paying jobs. Reality is that woman have found other jobs with better pay and more respect and personal pride.
"The rest is all travel/agency..." That is their solution to this problem. That is not the solution to provide the adequate staffing so the care can be appropriate. It is their solution to fill the holes in the present condition.
"They pay better, incentives are great..." Not if you have been a nurse for 15 years. At the top of the pay scale, you are lucky to make much more in agency. Many agency spots barely offer me $2 more than my pay scale. The benefits aren't as good if they are offered and you have to wait 90 days and pay more. If you are working in two facilities, you will not get overtime for your hours over 40. Agency pay is good for nurses early in their career but doesn't pay that much more for a nurse at the top of her scale. One of the problems with floor staff's beliefs is that agency gets paid so much. It used to be agency did not get benefits nor guaranteed hours, vacation or sick days. When you are in the $30-$40 or maybe even $42 an hour, that doesn't make up for what you don't get.
"It takes care of burnout..." Not really. Any agency nurse will tell you that we have to work harder than floor staff and if one patient complains you are out the door - no review - nothing. Agency gets hit harder with the well known patient dissatisfaction. Also, staff tends to look for their errors and anything wrong can get them booted. So the stress level and burn out is not absent. People that run agencies can tell you what they hear from their agency nurses. It's still rough.
"efficient for the employer..." You got that right. It is cheaper for them to pay agency in the long run because they are not paying benefits.
"Nurses long term is on the way out..." That is one of the symptoms of this problem.
I found a national petition addressing this. Anyone interested in the web address, PM me. I don't want to post it because I'm afraid it will get deleted or moderated.
You didn't mention if you were a newer nurse.
Women used to go into nursing because it was one of the few jobs that a woman could get with good pay. It has trended through us over the years as one that pays well. The starting pay doesn't seem to have improved all that much since I started 15 years ago. That is sad knowing how hard new nurses have to work while learning their skills. It is a pity to see new nurses thrown into the sharks trying to learn their skills working at the pace that experienced nurses are working for less pay. I would not want to be a new nurse at this time. New nurses used to look so ready to go and proud to become a nurse. Now they come through orientation looking scared and concerned. No wonder. They know they are hitting the floor running on fast paced units and worried about doing things right with the way the pace is. If you don't have good support around you it is even harder. The other dilemma is that the experienced nurses on the floor have to precept one new nurse after another. It used to be that you started with a smaller assignment to build the nurse up to a full assignment. Those days are gone. They don't staff for the trainee. The preceptor has to take a full assignment, often with specific patients for the trainee to get experience (and those can be very busy). That preceptor has to manage the full assignment and help the trainee. It burns them out. Their pace is twice as high as not precepting. Often times, the trainee gets to feel as a burden or dead weight. That's not fair. It strips many orientees from good training.
The other new fad is that new grads get training from nurses who have been in the field for maybe a year. I have to chuckle whenever the orientee asks the 1 year nurse a question and they have to turn around and ask a nurse that has been in the field or on that floor. Needless to say, a lot of those new grads need a lot of support when the orientation is done because there were those extra things they didn't get that an experienced nurse might have been able to give them. That learning curve takes longer out of orientation.
Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
notsonurseproof and bluefabian, i feel bad about your situation and it seems to me that lots of nurses come from other countries hoping it is better here. i have often wondered if that leaves the other countries even more shorthanded, and i don't know if it really is "greener" here. notsonurseproof, how many pts do you have in the icu?
you are right about agency nurses getting( and taking) the blame for all the ills of a hospital, floor,unit,etc. i just joined an agency this week. i figured if i'm going to get abused anyways, i might as well get paid better to take the nonsense from the administration!
flychick08...my handle.....means that in 2008, i hope, i'll be doing flight nursing! pts, nurses and even docs at pick-up facilities are usually very happy to see the flight crew arrive. if they're sick enough to fly, the above mentioned groups almost never complain.....
flychick i have always found that if the fog gets too thick i can always move on - that is the great advantage to agency in my experience. of course moving on means i move to the lesser of two or more evils - it is still tough out there.
so do you have a plan, explored training, and etc. for becoming a flight nurse? could be very cool - will enjoy doing it w/ you - vicariously of course!
"I just wonder what happens when the agency/travelling nurses get burnt out."
What seems to be happening with agency is identical to the units. The revolving door. You start adding places to your list that you won't go. Places add you to their list. Then...one less, two less, three less....replaced by a new agency nurse.....same thing....and then some of the newer nurses go to agency because it is difinitely more pay for them. Eventually, they tend to find it might not be their "niche" and back to a permanent job and maybe that revolving door again.
After 13 weeks of he** on a floor, agency can tend to feel ready to move on. Doesn't seem to be any statistics on that area.
I so agree with your previous message! I am a new nurse. I started on a med/surg floor but quickly got burned out trying to take a full load and provide quality care with no CNA, no tech and no support. It became increasingly difficult to feel good about what I was doing because there's just not enough hours in the day to get it all done. I have since left acute care and am now a school nurse. I couldn't be happier with my choice.
"The nurse to pt. ratio is horrendous every day, given the acuity."
Be careful. When I used "horrendous" and that statement to my last manager she said my communication was poor. She made a big stink about that word. I felt so wrong but I have seen it used by other nurses.
Thanks! I feel better. Mind if I sent that post to her?
Yeah, it is very difficult to accept giving up your life for "theirs" only to be rewarded by being forced to leave or the threat thereof. Each day many of us come in never knowing if today will be our last. I have worked for an organization for over 19 years. In the last three years I have witnessed more than 60 "let go" whether it was restructure, downsize, or just want to get rid of you... For several it was due to supervisory or management not liking what you say or do and either you resign as of today with a decent referral or get "laid off" or "fired" with a poor referral. Usually we find out by an email that states the employee has decided to leave for another opportunity as of TODAY-that's how we know which way it really went down .
Hi - you have my empathy. I've been a nurse for almost 40 years and have felt the way you describe for a good part of it. I felt overworked and resentful of people who weren't working as hard; I often stayed late to catch up on charting; and in the early years, at least, I had a good cry in the car before going home. I felt I never measured up (why couldn't I get my work done and leave on time like the others? Well, for one thing, being a perfectionist didn't help); I felt resentful of those in the 'cliques' who clearly were personality favorites - in fact, it was a bit like high school! Only the consequences are much higher when one is an adult working in nursing. There are some things you can change and some you cannot, but coming to know the difference is a key move. Nursing is notorious for both 'eating our young' and not supporting each other. It's pitiful but common, and some feel strongly it has to do with "lateral violence" in nursing as a whole. If you don't know the term, check it out.
I'm going to suggest something that might be misinterpreted as blaming you, but please know I'm not at all. Many of the workplace things you've described are on target but I know from experience that the conflict (both at work and within yourself) only gets worse when you feel SO down and SO resentful and SO frightened of the future, that you actually make things worse for yourself. You start feeling like a victim of the 'system' and helpless to change things so you start blaming that system across the board - and you get yourself nowhere. I've been there in the past and my best friend is there now, too.
So what I suggest is this - somehow, find some psychological counseling you can afford. If you have no health insurance, see if your town/city can offer help through an agency. Or see if you can get into a mental health clinic setting where you can pay on a sliding scale. Maybe there's a women's support group within a private psychology practice - you'd pay less and get even more support. I never knew whether or not to trust employee resources groups, but maybe you could.
There's so much good advice in the letters here about changing areas of nursing or indeed, changing careers through education - don't be afraid to try again! My nurse friend has been suffering so much through a nasty divorce, single parenthood, depression, anxiety, and a load of hospital workplace backstabbing that she's finally, gingerly stepping into an opportunity in an entirely different area of our hospital's nursing units with an eye to moving over fully if it works out. She's gotten to this stage by lots of support from other nurse friends and from professional counseling.
Which is how I've also survived the trenches - with counseling, you come to see the bigger picture in more realistic terms. You could feel better about yourself and others; even the malingerers do, in the end, get their comeuppance; you learn to concentrate more on improving your own interpersonal skills; you learn to clarify any personal issues and to feel less self-pity and anger. No, not every nursing management team is horrible; and if you're able to perhaps move or travel further away from the local meager pickings, you might get another new start that works out better.
You might learn to develop more self-esteem so that you end up functioning at a happier/higher level in general; with greater concentration on raising the level of the entire unit through your ideas, suggestions, constructive complaints, etc. You cannot fix everything; you will not find all the answers; you are not responsible for making your hospital a model for all nursing. But you can join a work committee that appeals to you in the slightest; you might join the nursing journal club and start it off with a review of barriers to unit cohesiveness, or some other issue that resonates.
Btw, this is a pet peeve of mine, too: "Why can't people untangle lines?"
But this: "I find myself picking up the slack and doing all of the jobs that countless others do not" is akin to co-dependency. You cannot do all the work that others fail to do. You're NOT personally responsible for it, and in a way, you're ending up feeling like a martyr. Do you see what I'm saying? That this is so much bigger than what any one nurse can do?
I do get the sense that you're feeling hopeless, and wonder if there's anything positive in your life? Do you take care of yourself outside the job? Do you have any fun? I worry about how sad and angry you seem to be. It's no wonder given the situation you're working in, but I think you've got to start with yourself. I wish you all the luck in the world. I'm still a nurse but have made some huge changes because I was able to. May things get better with you! :heartbeat
You are so right. Even knowing this doesn't help because I know how bad it really is out there.
Truthfully, since this happened, I got a call that my aunt - who is like my mom to me - is in bad shape down south. I'm thinking things happen for a reason and I have decided to try a travel RN position down there. So far, one place called me and doesn't have anything. As long as she is in ICU she is fine. When she gets out and goes to LTC I don't think she will make it. I think with my cousin and me taking care of her, she will have a better chance. We all know that even if the LTC has good worders, they probably will be overworked and at this point she is facing a trach and can not sit up or turn. Totally bedbound - probably for months. Without the right care she will be so deconditioned it won't be worth trying. I want to get down there so bad.
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jemtown
19 Posts
I am so sorry for the experience you have had. After 15 years I am sure that you have explored other areas of nursing. I think taking a break from nursing is a good idea. We are only here for a short time. It's important to be happy and be able to look forward to each day. There is a light at the end of this tunnel. You are in my thoughts and prayers as you find your way through this difficult time. Hang in there! :hgu: