Advise on how to deal "bossy" colleagues?

Liddle Noodnik · Jan 6, 2008

What do you think is the best approach towards colleagues who are acting arrogantly and being inapproapriately "bossy"? Please help. Thanks.

It's even MORE fun when subordinates act bossy. But at least you can say, "I'm the boss, back off". When it's a peer ya gotta be more tactful.

Is this situation long-standing or did it just start? I feel for ya. It is all about the delivery and apparently theirs is not too good eh?

mommalumps · Jan 7, 2008

You don't give them the "power". By that, I mean that if you stand for it, they will consistently make you feel this. Personally,I walk away. Rude? Possibly, but they get the point.

vamedic4, EMT-P · Jan 7, 2008

It's even MORE fun when subordinates act bossy. But at least you can say, "I'm the boss, back off". When it's a peer ya gotta be more tactful.
Is this situation long-standing or did it just start? I feel for ya. It is all about the delivery and apparently theirs is not too good eh?

Ouch...subordinates..such a touchy word. Coworkers are "peers", regardless of their job title. You have to be tactful, no matter what.

As for any techniques? Pull them aside and explain to them that their attitude (toward whomever) isn't going to help get things done any easier or quicker. It can be perceived as rude and that's certainly NOT the image the ER needs...from a patient or a provider standpoint.

Liddle Noodnik · Jan 7, 2008

Ouch...subordinates..such a touchy word. Coworkers are "peers", regardless of their job title. You have to be tactful, no matter what.

Yeah it can be touchy - depends what side you are standing on. I was working w/ this CNA for some time and she kept practically LAUGHING at me in front of pts when I was trying to HELP her. She would constantly try to tell me to "go do this" and "you should do that" and etc - it was her attitude. She was very condescending and yes, BOSSY. Then she would be sitting on her behind while everyone around her was working - I had to speak to her. You don't tell your charge nurse what to do and you sure don't refuse to do what she asks you to do.

This person and I did end up getting along after a fashion - and I did suggest she go on to nursing school, since she is a natural leader AND smart (but still, lazy ... lol)... But anyway - that's what I was referring to.

And don't worry there are plenty of threads about "Bossy CNA's" and "RN's who are too good to wipe bottoms"

Liddle Noodnik · Jan 7, 2008

Ouch...subordinates..such a touchy word. Coworkers are "peers", regardless of their job title. You have to be tactful, no matter what.
As for any techniques? Pull them aside and explain to them that their attitude (toward whomever) isn't going to help get things done any easier or quicker. It can be perceived as rude and that's certainly NOT the image the ER needs...from a patient or a provider standpoint.

ps, I didn't mean you LITERALLY say "I'm the boss, back off." LOL!

vamedic4, EMT-P · Jan 7, 2008

I hear you, Zoey...and you are spot on.

Good for you for handling a situation with tact. You'd be amazed at the number of nurses I've seen just blurt it out ("because I said so, or "because I'm the boss"). That's when I calmly take them aside and explain the rules to them.

Liddle Noodnik · Jan 7, 2008

That's when I calmly take them aside and explain the rules to them.

ha ha (shuddering... )

nyapa, RN · Jan 7, 2008

What do you think is the best approach towards colleagues who are acting arrogantly and being inapproapriately "bossy"? Please help. Thanks.

Explain what your own priorities first.
If they 'tell' you to do something which is against your own knowledge, back up your actions with evidence based practice. If they still insist, and they may be senior to you...document...
Pull them aside, and be assertive. Explain how you feel, and why. Put the ball back in their court.
Go further if it has progressed to bullying. Ask for mediation with your nurse manager.

It would be lovely to be bossy back wouldn't it! But then one sinks to their level...

Liddle Noodnik · Jan 16, 2008

...go further if it has progressed to bullying. ask for mediation with your nurse manager.

i read this response too quickly and thought that it said: "ask for medication ..."

i suppose that could work too!

northshore08 · Feb 2, 2008

I have found that often the bossy arrogant colleagues are insecure, and the behavior is a coverup. I am a great fan of the "Can I talk to you in the breakroom for a minute?" approach.

If it is becoming a real focus of each shift you work, I agree with confronting the coworker, preferably with others that have been the focus of the same behavior. It also helps for it to happen in a mediated forum if needed, and sometimes that can be in the medroom with your charge nurse. If these colleagues have a real beef with the nursing care you deliver, it is WRONG to fuss at you in front of other staff members or especially patients. :angryfire

Now, I have to tell you that the last one that acted that way toward me was that way with everyone. But it was funny how things changed once I helped her with a couple of rough patients.

Oh, and you could always let the bossy one be your preceptor or teach you something. That way they feel they are useful and less likely to attack you.

Hope any of this helps. Stand your ground! :specs:

TinyNurse, RN · Feb 15, 2008

I work with a new grad nurse that is very bossy, and she even thinks she's in charge when she isn't. I mostly steer clear of her, but when she takes a tone with me I either ignore her, or laugh.